


A Rose for a Kiss

by CanuckleheadCowgirl, magnetocerebro



Series: The 714 Marvel Universe [21]
Category: Avengers (Comics), X-Men (Comicverse)
Genre: Gen, Next Gen, X-Kids - Freeform, because we're like that, continuing our trend of tryna make everyone happy, lookit all the kids, while also being evil to everyone
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-08-20 05:31:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 63,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16549853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CanuckleheadCowgirl/pseuds/CanuckleheadCowgirl, https://archiveofourown.org/users/magnetocerebro/pseuds/magnetocerebro
Summary: When Scott Summers' brother-in-law in the police force gets the word that the police believe a mutant is responsible for a recent rash of break-ins, he calls up the X-Men to investigate.And what better X-Man than Remy LeBeau, thief extraordinaire?While Remy investigates the (very cute) sneak thief (investigate here meaning "flirts with," of course, because this is Remy we're talking about), the rest of the X-Men get to deal with family drama. After all, the family is getting bigger all the time, and that means more challenges.Not to mention extended family drama, Billy and Teddy's quest to adopt, and Sying's never-ending love of being a big brother :)





	1. Pretty Lil' Sneak Tief

 

* * *

Anton Wright had been getting more and more reports of robberies in high-end places around New York, and it was getting to the point of frustration for most of the members of his force.

And it didn't help that his sergeant was riding him to figure it out, because by that point, it was well-known around the force that Anton was the one to go to when it was a mutant "problem." He still wasn't sure how that had gotten started, and he'd  _tried_ telling them that he really didn't have any control over anything at  _all_  with the school, let alone the rest of mutantkind. But that was like talking to a brick wall.

So when he got another call about a robbery, he just… let out all his breath and called up Scott. It was time to pull in some help.

"You know those thefts I told you about?" he asked his brother-in-law once he had him on the phone. "We've just had another one a few miles north of you. That offer to help still stand?"

"Of course," Scott said, and Anton could already hear in the background that he was moving because the sound of kids got a bit more muffled. "I'll bring Gambit with me. Just tell me where to meet you."

Anton gave him the address and then hung up before he went back to looking over the scene. It was just like the other break-ins that had been happening all across New York. There wasn't a single sign of forced entry, no alarms had been tripped, no fingerprints, no DNA — nothing. There wasn't even anything on the cameras, though there wouldn't be, not when several minutes of footage was missing on every single one of them.

The popular theory was that either this guy was a professional the likes of which the state police were probably better off handing to someone like Interpol ... or a mutant or other powered person who the state police were probably better off handing to the Avengers. Either way, it was clear they were simply being outclassed, and it was  _frustrating_.

The rest of the police had mostly left the scene by the time Scott and Remy arrived — which was how Anton wanted it, anyway, because he knew how some of his fellow officers were about the X-Men. Still, Anton made a point to send his greenie partner home when he saw Scott's car pulling up — the guy was an idiot, and he didn't have time to deal with that crap.

"Thanks for coming out here on short notice," Anton said as he met his brother-in-law in the driveway. "These cases are really giving me a headache. No one can figure out how this guy is getting  _in_ , much less how he's not leaving any traces."

"If there's any way we can help, we'll do it," Scott said. "I think we'll take the resident expert in B&E since … well. The ferals are off somewhere. Otherwise, they'd just track them down."

"The dogs haven't had any luck at that," Anton admitted. "We tried that route when it was a former senator's house that got hit."

"You'd be surprised what they can find," Scott replied.

"At this point, I'd be happy for any lead at  _all_ ," Anton admitted as he motioned for them to follow him into the house. He showed them the opened safe, the list of the missing antiques and jewelry, and took them through the security systems that all failed to catch the intruder.

For the most part, Remy looked mostly uninterested as he looked from afar, not willing to get very close to the open crime scene, though he did look a bit impressed at the security that the thief had gone through. More so when he saw that there was no sign that this person had turned off any of the systems. At least, not in the manner that he would have done it.

"Whoever this guy is, he's a pro. I've been tracking back the pattern, and there's a string of break-ins following his MO across state lines, if you account for people thinking it was insurance fraud," Anton said, shaking his head. "It's just recently he got to New York."

"And there hasn't been anything at  _all_ to identify this guy?" Scott asked.

Anton shook his head. "Well, not unless you count the fact that he broke form when he broke into Senator Robbins' place. Smashed the living room to pieces on the way out."

"You'll forgive me if I don't weep for him," Scott said dryly.

"Nobody did," Anton said with a smirk. "At least nobody who matters. But I still gotta investigate it."

"Sounds like it's leaning more toward one of our problems then if they trashed Robbins' house," Scott said, sounding a bit down at the negative press that was bound to follow a mutant thief.

"Yeah, that's why I called you in. The chief is thinking of leaking it to the press that we think it's a mutant just to see if we can get him to back off, but if you can give me a lead before then, I convinced him to hold off."

"All I can do is try," Scott replied.

While Scott and Anton were talking, Remy discreetly pulled out his phone and sent a text half in code to his guild back home to see if there was anyone in the area that he should be aware of. He only frowned that much deeper when the response was that they didn't have anyone with that level of skill anywhere nearby — outside of himself, of course.

"I got nuttin'," Remy said suddenly.

Both Scott and Anton looked up at that. Scott looked surprised, but Anton just looked discouraged. "Nothing, really?"

"Dat's de word from de guild," Remy said, though he was looking harder at the room in general. "Ain't nobody can do dis kinda thing."

"So it's someone new," Scott surmised.

"We find 'em with a lil' bit of time," Remy said with a confident nod. "Just gon' need a list of who been hit."

"Thought you might need that," Anton agreed. "I've got a list in my car, and a list of what was taken." He gave Scott a look. "Officially, I didn't give either of you access to that, though. Some of the places are high-end, high-confidentiality."

"Don't worry 'bout dat none," Remy said. "We don' tell nobody."

"Didn't think you would, but it always bears repeating," Anton replied before he let out a bit of a sigh and scrubbed his hand over his face. "Whoever this guy is, his timing is awful. Midterms are this fall, and you know Robbins won't stay quiet about a breakin like this if it  _is_ a mutant. Or even suspected to be one," he added in an undertone to Scott.

"Then we'll try to get this sorted out before it becomes a problem."

Anton nodded as he took the two X-Men back out of the house and made sure they both had the files they needed. "Thanks for lookin' into this. And hey, Chance and Charlie still coming down this weekend for Mary Beth's birthday party?"

"As long as she doesn't mind a few extra party guests," Scott laughed. "A lot of the students are home for the summer, so the kids stick like glue together and don't go anywhere but in one big mob."

"Yeah, Leslie Ann said the kids at the school love spoiling the little tykes," Anton chuckled. "I'll make sure we've got extras for the rest of 'em. I know Chance has gotta be missin' Elin if the Howletts are gone."

"Yeah." Scott shook his head. "That's been going on since the day she was born, really."

"Yeah, I've seen the videos," Anton chuckled. He clapped Scott in a one-armed hug before he waved them both off. "I'll let you know if there's anything else I can find to help you. The sooner we catch this guy, the more time I can spend with my wife," he added with a little smile.

"Then we'll push hard to get this fixed for you," Scott replied with a grin. "Can't have her mad and waiting for you."

"Nope. That's dangerous territory," Anton agreed, laughing. "See ya, Scott. Thanks, Remy. I'll give you a call later."

The men parted ways, but even with as obviously curious as Scott was, Remy waited until they were nearly back at the mansion before he voiced his opinion. "Either dis guy is better'n me — which just  _can not be so_  — or dey cheatin' wit' some interestin' powers."

"I'm sure it's the powers," Scott said with a little smirk. "Which makes it our problem."

"I tink fastest way to know for sure might be to ask your lil' girl to take a peek," Remy admitted. "But if she busy, I got some thoughts on where dis tief be hittin' next."

"She won't be back until this weekend. She and Betsy were in Madrid last time she called," Scott admitted. "I think they were going to hit Venice next…"

"Then I guess ol' Remy needs to get to work," he replied.

* * *

"Is everything alright with Anton?" Annie asked after Scott had put the twins to sleep. Cody was being a bit of a pain, so Annie had taken him back to their room to snuggle with him, and he was zonked out on the pillow next to her head, one little hand wrapped up in her hair so that she couldn't exactly move.

"He's just got a pretty difficult case," Scott admitted as he slipped into bed next to her and gave her a little smile. "He thinks mutants might be involved."

"And are they?" she asked, one eyebrow quirked up at him.

Scott let out a breath. "Yeah, Remy thinks so. That or it's someone better than him, and you  _know_ he doesn't think that's possible," he said with the slightest of smirks.

"You X-Men are all so vain," Annie said with a little twinkle in her eyes.

" _You_ try being the one to tell Remy we should consider the idea that there might be someone out there better than him."

"I wouldn't dare," Annie laughed.

"Exactly." He shook his head with a little chuckle. "Anyway, he's looking into it. He thinks he might have an idea of where this guy might strike next."

"What kind of problem is it, exactly?" Annie asked, sounding a bit concerned, but Scott quickly shook his head.

"Just a rash of break-ins, high end homes — just a few days ago, whoever this guy is hit Senator Robbins' home."

Annie grinned outright. "Oh, I shouldn't be happy about that, but I really, really am," she said as she tried not to laugh and glanced down to make sure that Cody really was asleep so she wasn't being  _too_ bad of an example.

"Yeah, whoever it is trashed the place on their way out, which makes us think he's a mutant," Scott nodded. "Not a whole lot of love lost there, honestly. If this guy wasn't going after other homes too, I might not even look into it."

"Of course you would," Annie laughed. "You can't stand the idea of a mutant out there causing trouble that you don't know about."

He shook his head and gave her a bit of a dry look before he leaned over and kissed her. "Yeah, you might be right."

"Might be?" She arched an eyebrow at her.

"Sorry — you're always right," Scott laughed, and she nodded approvingly.

"And don't you forget it, Scott Summers," she told him.

* * *

Out of the list that Anton had given him, Remy knew that this house — an old colonial-style one that had been around for centuries and had been passed down through the family — was the most likely target. Whoever this guy was, he wasn't just going after the most lucrative catches but the most obnoxious families or owners. And the owner of this particular house — an old man who lived mostly alone and who had all but cut out his entire family because he was just  _mean_  — was practically asking for a visit from Anton's street thief.

He prowled the grounds of the large house under the cover of a moonless night as he watched for any sign of this thief, but thus far, he hadn't seen the slightest sign of movement besides the slight wind that evening.

So he was a bit surprised when he  _did_ at last spot movement — this time inside the house. And since the old man was out of town for the week, it had to be the street thief. In a rush, Remy headed over, just getting a glimpse of long blonde curls before she seemed to disappear again.

Still, Remy wasn't too worried. It was going to take a while for her to get through the safe, and when she did, she was bound to be mad — since Remy had already liberated the contents before the thief could get there.

He slipped past the house's defenses the same way he'd come in the first time — silent and stealthy as always — before he made his way to where he knew the safe was and carefully, quietly leaned in the doorway as he watched the young woman work.

She was good — he recognized her technique and knew it was the fastest way to crack this particular brand of safe, so she must have done her homework before she came. And she was careful — even wearing gloves and long black clothing, she made it a point not to touch or brush against anything but the safe she was working on.

And to be frank ... she was easy on the eyes. Long blonde hair in tight curls ... and she was slim and tall enough that she might match his height with a pair of good shoes.

He waited until she opened the safe and had to smile when he heard the whispered curses in French, of all things.

"Oh, now dat ain't no kinda way for a lady to talk," Remy said quietly. "'Specially a pretty lil' sneak tief like you."

The thief spun on her heel to face him, surprise painted over her plump pink lips and brown eyes as she took him in before she let out a light little laugh. "I am no ladee," she said in a heavily accented voice, very French, her accent Parisian.

" _Non_?" he asked, his head tilted slightly. "I'm afraid we gon' have to disagree on that."

She laughed again and shook her head. "If you say so," she said. She closed the safe and seemed to be studying him as she raked her gaze over his coat. "No, I don't suppose you would keep such trea-zures on your person. You empt-eed ze safe before I arrived ... when? Zis morning?"

"Ol' Gambit don' tell those secrets,  _petit_ ," he replied with a little smirk.

She waved her hand at him. "Ees no matter. You can keep ze trea-zures if you like."

"Dem baubles ain't the kind of treasures I'm lookin' for," he said, unable to stop the smile.

At that, she quirked one eyebrow at him and laughed. "Then I have no  _tr_ _é_ _sors_ to give you," she said easily.

"You'd be surprised," Remy said.

But she simply laughed and blew him a kiss with one hand as she waved with the other — and in an instant, she seemed to dissipate until she was nothing but a breath of wind.

"Well dat certainly explains it," he mumbled before he lightly headed out again. Anton would find the jewels in the morning on his front seat of his patrol car.


	2. The Romanoff Women

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which little Zoe Barton knows what she wants and doesn't take no for an answer. Also, Remy is definitely falling for this sneak thief.

 

Scott and Annie hadn't gone far for their anniversary that year, just ducking away for a few days of privacy — and they were back for Cody's birthday the next day. The littlest Summers had turned one and, as was customary, Annie had to make him a cake to smash.

But honestly, Cody seemed less excited about the cake than he was excited about the fact that the Howletts were back from their vacation, and he ran straight to James to wrap the older little toddler in a big hug. The two little boys dissolved into a pile of giggles as their parents more or less stepped around them and watched the silly little ones and their happy reunion.

"You'd think it's been months," K said, shaking her head as Chance ran over to do the exact same thing to Elin, only he also made it a point to shyly kiss her on the cheek.

"Yeah, they're just ... attached for some reason," Scott said with a shrug as he watched his two sons excitedly hugging their respective besties.

"Oh yeah, not a learned behavior  _at all_ ," K said with the most sarcastic tone Scott had ever heard.

Scott shot her a very dry look. "They do spend a lot of time with the other kids, and you know how Krissy and Kari are about hugs and sweets."

"Yeah, well. Fury doesn't have a picture of the kids hugging on his desk. That's all I'm saying."

"That was a special circumstance," Scott defended with his arms crossed, though it was clear she didn't buy it for a moment.

"Was the circumstance that you missed him terribly and were overcome with emotion? Because … that … is also apparently genetic."

"He was dead. It really doesn't count," Scott insisted even as Charlie decided to get in on the hugging and wrapped her arms around Logan at the knees.

"It's one of my favorite pictures in the world," K told him.

"Of  _course_ it is," Scott deadpanned.

"Two of my favorite guys ever? Getting along? On  _film_? Amazing." K said as she made her way over to him. "You don't even hug your brother like that."

He shot her an even drier look than before before his expression very suddenly changed into a smirk and he picked her up in a spinning hug. "You're right — I should do that more often for other people," he told her when he set her back down.

"That was perfect. I'll take one every morning," she said before she popped up on her toes and kissed his cheek.

He shook his head at her before he tipped his head at the kids who were still giggling and hugging. "Help me gather them? Clint and Natasha are getting here soon with Zoe — and you know that'll be a whole other round of hugging.

K nodded before she whistled shrilly to catch the kids attention. "Guys," she said, bending down so she could look at them better when they all turned her way. "Logan needs a dogpile, don't you think?"

The entire group of them broke out in  _beaming_ smiles as Chance led the charge with a war whoop. Cody brought up the rear and running as fast as his little legs would carry him to keep up with the older kids to join the dogpile — and they all valiantly tried to bring Logan down.

"Maybe you wanna join 'em?" K teased Scott's way.

"I'm good, thanks," he said, giving her another dry look as the kids were giggling madly and drawing attention from the kitchen, where Kari had escaped her mom and was making a mad dash to join them.

"Kate! Maybe you wanna help them — Scott's shy."

A moment later, Kate appeared in the doorway as well. She had Sying in one arm and Krissy in the other, and both kids were looking absolutely livid with each other. "You guys want to help?" Kate asked in an obvious attempt to get them both to play.

" _Nein!_ " Krissy squirmed in Kate's grasp, and Sying glared at her. "Wanna race again. Sying  _cheated_."

"How did he cheat?" K asked as she made her way over to take Sying out of Kate's arms.

"I didn't cheat," Sying insisted. "Krissy  _won_."

"He cheated, he cheated, he cheated," Krissy sang back at him, little arms crossed as her tail was twitching behind her.

"Do you think he went slow for you?" K asked.

" _Ja_!" Krissy nodded fervently, and Kate caught K's eye with a look that confirmed that, yes, that was what had happened.

"He's trying to play fair," K told her as she snuggled the little boy. "Because he's  _way_ faster than everyone else."

Sying nodded with wide eyes. "Daddy says not everybody can run as fast or pick up big things, so I gotta be fair and be careful."

"He's right," K agreed before she gave him a little kiss. "But Krissy doesn't want you to go slow for her."

"But then I win always," Sying said, wrinkling his nose in confusion.

"Nu-uh," Krissy sang out. "I fast too!"

"Maybe this is a lesson she wants to learn for herself," K told him.

He wrinkled his nose even more. "But it's not fair."

"You can't help how fast you are, and even if you keep winning now, she'll probably beat even  _you_ someday," K said as she glanced toward Kate and Krissy.

He giggled and leaned in to whisper, "Nu-uh."

K giggled with him and nodded her head. "She might."

"Even if I don't play fair?" He looked skeptical.

"Even if you run at top speed, she still might beat you."

"See?" Krissy stuck her tongue out at him triumphantly, but Sying was just grinning wide.

"But that also means you can't get mad when he beats you now," K told her. "Because he will win."

"Okay… but I'll still win," Krissy insisted as she scrambled to be let down. "RaceyoutoLogan!" she called out, blatantly cheating as she ran toward Logan before Sying was even down from K's arms.

Kate chuckled as she watched Krissy and Sying run to join the dogpile. "They've been arguing all morning. She hates it when he tries to do stuff like that, but he's not wrong."

"No, he's not. But she's got this stubborn streak that I just … I don't know where it comes from. Gotta be from her father's side, though, I'm sure."

"Clearly," Kate agreed, though she was rolling her eyes and smirking at K.

It wasn't long before the rest of the kids from outside the mansion showed up — Zoe and her parents first and then Dani, Gerry, even Eleanor and Magda.

Of course, as soon as Magda showed up, she and Charlie were off, the two of them giggling and trading stories about their summer vacation adventures. Magda was  _so excited_ about her new house in town and how she was going to get to see her grandfather and cousins all the time now.

Gerry went right to his Aunt Katie to tell her all about how excited he was for Kindergarten and how much he was working on his letters and numbers so he could help other kids learn them too. "And Mom says I gotta be careful talking about everybody here and all my friends, because not all the other kids know about the 'Vengers and the X-Men, so I'm not supposed to tell them everything, even if I think my family is the  _coolest_ ," he explained to her happily. "And  _then_ when  _Chance_ and his sister start Kindergarten next year, I can show them all about it! Won't that be really cool?"

"You're going to be amazing at school," Kate agreed with a grin as she hugged him tight before he wriggled out of her grasp to go talk Chance's ear off about Kindergarten coming up.

Zoe, meanwhile, seemed to have made it her mission to make sure that Cody was having a good birthday. She had at some point grabbed hold of his hand and didn't seem to be that interested in letting go as she made sure to get him to the table where his cake was and point out the frosting to him. "See?" she pointed. "For you."

Cody just kept trying to get her to let go of his hand, though. "No, no," he said, frowning.

"For you," Zoe insisted, still trying to pull him over before Annie was quite done getting everything set up.

But Sying intervened and grabbed Zoe's other hand with a little frown and a shake of his head. "No, Zoe," he said very seriously. "No means no."

"But yummy," Zoe said, pointing up at the cake. "For Cody!"

"But no means no," Sying insisted. "Annie not done — let's play?" he offered, now pulling  _Zoe_ along by the hand as Cody looked relieved to be freed and immediately ran away to go hang out with James.

" _Nyet_." Zoe pulled her hand away and crossed her arms with a scowl, and Sying looked very lost as he tried to figure out how to  _help_.

"Sying, do you want to help clean up the extra frosting?" Annie asked.

The little boy brightened up immediately and climbed up the table, nodding fervently. "Yes! Yes please!" he sang out as Annie put him to work, freeing up Zoe to sulkily make her way over to where the other kids were.

Still, it was hard for Zoe to keep sulking when Kari wrapped her up in a hug with a whispered, "Hi, Zo!"

Of course, with all of Zoe's earlier insisting, it was proving a little difficult to get Cody to actually want anything to do with his cake when it  _was_ ready, as he was stubbornly insisting that he did  _not_ want to set down. "Wanna  _play_ ," he kept saying, trying to scramble back down every time someone put him in front of the cake.

Annie tried several times to get Cody to try his cake, but each time, he just got more and more insistent and stubborn. Finally, before anyone noticed what she was doing and could stop her, Zoe got fed up with Cody, grabbed a handful of his cake, and threw it in his face.

For a moment, everything was silent as Cody seemed to be trying to figure out if he was going to cry or not. But then he saw the smug look on Zoe's face and decided that revenge was the better option, though probably none of the adults had expected the small wrestling match that developed from there and splattered bits of cake everywhere until Natasha and Scott were able to get the two of them separated — though by that time Zoe was giggling maniacally every time Cody shot her a glare.

"Vindictive little Summers," K muttered to Logan, who had to try hard not to laugh at that one, going so far as to pull her over into a hug and kiss her temple so he could chuckle along with her.

Natasha took her little girl off to go hose her down, and it was clear to everyone that she was getting a talking to for her behavior, but she didn't look sorry in the least even as she was sullenly escorted over to Cody to give a forced "sorry" through her teeth.

Cody glared at her and stuck out his tongue before he jutted his chin out and walked right past her to go find something and some _one_  else to play with.

"Sorry about that, really," Clint muttered to Scott, shaking his head at his little girl as Zoe had her arms crossed and was glaring defiantly at anyone who looked her way. "She's… I'd say she's going through a phase, but…" He rubbed the back of his neck and did his best to look apologetic.

Scott sighed and shook his head. "He's stubborn too," he admitted. "And it's alright — no one saw her until she had the cake."

"Yeah, she is a Romanoff."

Thankfully, the rest of the party managed to go off without any more of the kids getting into fights once the party games got started for the older kids and the younger kids got to play with some new toys. By the time it was time to go home, even Zoe had dropped her glare and was halfway attached to Kurt and insisting that she wanted to stay with Uncle Kurt and Aunt Katie and not go home at all.

"Sweetie, we have to put Kari to sleep. She's smaller than you, and she needs a nap," Kate explained gently, ruffling Zoe's red curls, but the little girl just stuck out her lower lip.

"I nap too."

"Yes, you need a nap too," Clint said, still trying to pry Zoe off of Kurt without hurting him, since she had a couple handfuls of his fur and was holding on tight.

"With Kari."

Clint let out a breath and shook his head. "No, sweetheart. We're going home, but we can play with Kari later, okay?"

" _Nyet_."

" _Da_ ," Logan said before he reached over and started to tickle her.

" _Nyet, Nyet, Nyet!_ " she said, gasping and giggling, though she'd let go of Kurt because of all the tickling and was trying to wriggle away from Logan.

But Logan had a solid grip and he kept tickling her until Clint had a decent hold on her and she had tears in her eyes from laughing so hard. "Be good and maybe next time you can spend the night."

"Sto-o-o-o-p," she moaned, still trying to wriggle. "No. No tickle!"

"Are you gonna be good?" Logan asked.

"Yes.  _Da_. No tickle!"

He finally stopped and gave her a little kiss on the forehead. "Quit givin' your dad a hard time. He can't take it."

"It's genetic," Clint said with a little smirk as Zoe crossed her arms but nodded at Logan.

"Thank you," Natasha whispered over Logan's shoulder as she gave him a little kiss on the cheek.

"She's just like her mother," Logan whispered back.

"I was not that stubborn."

Logan gave her a look, with one eyebrow raised, as he crossed his arms. "You really wanna try that line with  _me_?"

She smirked. "I was an angel," she said sweetly, just to needle him.

"Yeah, sure you were. Must be gettin senile in your old age," he teased.

"Impossible," she said with a dismissive wave. "I'm not a day over seventy."

"I know better than that," Logan whispered. "Or your math is bad. Could be a sign of something."

She laughed and kissed his cheek. "Like you can talk."

"Yeah? I don't look anywhere near my age. Not a gray hair yet either," he said low with a little smirk.

"Hey. I'm proud of that first gray hair. Do you know how long that took?"

"Closer to  _eighty_ years, I'm guessing."

"Oh, relax. I'm still in top form, and I'll put you on the ground if you don't believe me," she said lightly. "It's nice not to look twenty-three."

"You can try, but I don't want you to break a hip," he teased.

"You wish," she laughed. "You just want an excuse not to be embarrassed."

"Big talk, little girl."

"And I have the training to back it up," she said with a little smile.

"Yeah, no idea where that came from," he said as he pulled her over for a hug. "Try somethin' new — like teachin' that little girl how to be nice. You know, before she ends up with an idiot."

"Like I'd let that happen," Natasha said. "And she  _can_ be nice. You should see her with Kari and James. She just thinks Cody is an idiot." She smirked a bit wider at that. "Because he doesn't listen to her."

"Yeah, nothing like you  _at all_ ," he replied.

"Shut up," she laughed before she kissed his cheek and headed over to Clint as the little family packed up to go, with Zoe still a little pouty but finally behaving for her dad as they all said goodbye.

* * *

Remy was waiting in the high-rise for his sneak thief to come by, just watching for any sign of movement in the place he had staked out.

The authorities weren't interested in this presidential suite because it wasn't one of those big, fancy houses. But this particular woman, who had swindled several well-meaning family members — along with five husbands — out of their life savings… she was a prime target for this little French thief.

Remy had noticed what the police were overlooking — there was an underlying method to this little thief's targets. It wasn't just that she was hitting the rich who were scumbags — she was hitting those who had wronged people  _personally_. Family members with their inheritances stolen. Friends who had been cheated for their kindness. People like Robbins whose own son was a mutant — according to JJ's gleeful report at the height of the political storm two years ago. Her targets had enemies.

Add to that the fact that none of the fences Remy knew had seen or even heard a whisper of the missing valuables, and Remy was certain that this blonde had a little more going on than just a Robin Hood complex and a good power set for thievery.

It was a quiet night, and the wind had been still all evening, so when a slight breeze came through and played across the windows, Remy was sure that the thief had made her way inside.

As before, Remy had already taken the liberty of relieving the safe of all its valuables, but this time, he stayed in the other room, seated lazily on the couch as he waited for her to find the present he left for her instead of the contents of the safe.

He heard the little gasp before the girl slipped into the room, her windy form sliding under the crack of the door before she reformed in a whirlwind, her arms crossed and a slight flush on her cheeks as she held the single long-stemmed rose that he had left for her in the safe between her long fingers.

"What ees thees?" she asked, a bit of a fire in her expression as she turned the rose over and over in between her fingers.

Remy shrugged lightly, though he couldn't quite stop the smile. "Seemed like an' awful lot o' trouble for a pretty tief to go tru witout sometin' waitin' for her at de end."

She let out a huff, but, Remy noticed, she didn't toss aside the rose either. "Why do you interfere?" she asked instead, shaking her head the slightest bit. "You are an X-Man; you see my work with ze senator who cause so much  _la_ _difficulté, non_?"

"You gon' cause more trouble,  _petit_ ," Remy told her with one eyebrow raised. "He ain't gon' like de idea of a mutant tief goin' tru his home."

But at that, she laughed breezily. "He won't say anee-thing," she said confidently. "He is missing too many … important things zat he would like to stay hidden." There was a little troublemaking sparkle to her gaze as she looked Remy over. "So zere is no reason to look so serious, X-Man. Eet ees no good look for you."

At that, Remy broke into a wide grin her way and sat up a bit straighter. "Ol' Gambit look good in anything,  _petit_ ," he told her, still wearing the wide and increasingly crooked grin.

She let out a little scoffing noise, "Oh, you mangle ze language."

"What's de matter,  _cher_? You ain't never heard a Cajun before?"

She looked him over once more, appraisingly, and then laughed. "Do try to stay out of my way," she told him at last, and though Remy realized what she was doing a moment before she faded back into her breezy form, he was a split second too late to stop her as she blew him a kiss and disappeared literally on the wind.


	3. Remy (and Kari) Have Valentines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Leslie Ann wants to join the team, the kids are all either flirting or causing trouble, and Remy is just falling harder and harder.

 

As the school year approached, more and more of the students were coming back, and the mansion was much louder and fuller. Almost all of the junior squad was back — except for Rico and Ziggy, who had moved down to Houston so Rico could go to college down there. He was apparently still determined to be an astronaut — and Ziggy figured she might as well go with her boyfriend and see if she could convince NASA to catch up with the kind of technology the Avengers and X-Men had. She was, after all, a high-calibre genius.

But with Rico and Ziggy gone, and with Tammy and Tyler increasingly spending more time with the senior crew, not to mention the fact that Tommy and Cassie were spending half their time with the Avengers so they could hang out with Billy and Teddy…. There was space on the junior squad, and Leslie Ann  _wanted it_.

" _Please_ , Uncle Scott?" she begged, her eyes wide and her hands clasped under her chin. "Please? Jana's my best friend, and  _she's_ training with the team. I just want to  _train_  with them! Please? I won't even go on missions!"

She had managed to corner Scott at dinner, where she knew there were witnesses, and when he looked over at the other senior X-Men, it was quickly obvious that he wouldn't be getting any help there, because they were all just smirking at him and watching him flounder in the face of his very, very determined niece.

"Please?" Leslie Ann said again, all but bouncing on her toes as she gave Scott her best Bambi eyes. "I'm old enough — I  _am_! I'm gonna be fourteen in just a couple months, and I've been working really hard in self-defense, and I've been practicing  _all summer_ on getting my powers even better. Please oh  _please_?"

Scott finally scrubbed a hand over his face and looked at his expectant niece. "It's not  _just_ my decision to make, Leslie Ann," he told her.

"Yeah, but if I convince  _you_ —"

"Have you talked to your dad about this?" Scott asked, and when Leslie Ann immediately went into a bit of a pout, he knew she hadn't.

"Maybe if  _you_ talk to him…" she started to say, then trailed off as she realized that she had trapped herself.

But then Scott leaned forward with the smallest of smiles and a twinkle in his eye. "Don't worry — I'll talk to him. I think you'd be pretty good at being an X-Man," he told her quietly. When she positively  _beamed_ at him, he added, "We just need to make sure you're putting in the work to get there the  _right way_."

"I  _am_ ," she promised fervently. "I am! I'm working hard, and I'm studying my guts out, and I just  _really, really_ want to be an X-Man!"

"Then I'm sure you will be," Scott assured her. "But you have to do what everyone else on the team did. You have to get permission, and you have to take the evaluations, and—"

"Oh, thank you thank you thank you!" Leslie Ann cut in before Scott could finish, throwing her arms around his neck as she pulled him into an incredibly tight hug and kissed his cheek before she burst back out of the dining room, clearly on her way back home to try to convince her dad to give his permission.

She rushed right past Storm and Forge, who were coming back into the dining room after Storm had to excuse herself because she simply wasn't feeling well enough to be around people. The two of them watched the excited little girl bound past them before Forge very gently pulled out a chair for Storm to sit down. She wasn't due for another six weeks, but still, it was a high-risk pregnancy not only because of the rough start with the Shi'ar but simply because Storm was older, and Forge was babying her — and the entire mansion thought it was the most adorable thing to happen in those walls in years.

"What's got her so excited?" Forge asked as Annie pushed him the plates she had saved for the two of them while they were gone.

"She wants to join the junior squad," Kate explained.

Forge grinned at the idea, and Storm smiled and looked Scott's way. "And what did you tell her?"

"I told her she needs to get permission from her parents first," Scott told her honestly, but at that, Storm shook her head and tutted the slightest bit.

"You know Anton won't acknowledge that his little girl is old enough to do that," Storm told Scott severely. "He's been supportive of the defense classes and everything else, but he doesn't want her to have to  _use_ it."

"He'll come around," Annie put in. "He's just overprotective, considering all the trouble we've had at the mansion in the last couple years she's been here."

But Storm looked between the two of them for a moment before she cocked one eyebrow and pushed against the table to stand. "I'll talk to Rachel and Anton myself," she decided.

Kurt frowned a bit and was half standing. "Should you really be—"

But Storm shot him a thunderous, commanding look. "Should I really be what, little brother?" she asked. "Using the phone? I'm not  _invalid_."

Kurt looked a little bit embarrassed as he sat back down, though K was giving him a triumphant sort of look.

"At least finish dinner first," Annie suggested kindly. "Anything you can keep down."

Storm smiled gently Annie's way and nodded the slightest bit as she sat back down and simply ate the dinner Annie had kept warm — quickly and quietly — before she swept majestically from the room without so much as a backward glance to go advocate for her favorite little garden helper.

* * *

Once more, Remy found himself sneaking into a home that he was sure his little sneak thief would hit next. The security systems themselves were easy enough to bypass, and the safe ... well, it was child's play.

He was already looking forward to seeing the lithe French girl again, if he was honest with himself, and he had a smile on his face as he whistled old Cajun tunes under his breath while he worked.

It took him almost no time at all to get the safe open, but to his surprise… there was nothing inside, except for a single white card.

With raised eyebrows, Remy reached into the safe and pulled the card to find that his sneak thief had left him a single kiss, lipstick pressed to the card in a perfect imprint of her mouth, and he couldn't help but chuckle a bit to himself as he felt the light breeze pick up in the room that meant the thief was there as well.

"You took so long I thought perhaps you were not so smart as you think you are," she said with a light and airy laugh. "Did you not see the pattern?"

He grinned at her outright and shook his head at her. "Alright,  _cher_ , you done caught ol' Gambit off his game," he admitted. His grin spread a little wider as he added, "Seems a shame to have jus' this card an' not the real thing,  _non_?"

But she simply laughed at him as she leaned lightly against the wall, her eyes sparkling. "Eet seemed such a shame for a handsome thief like you to go to all zat trouble weeth no reward," she said, still with that sparkle in her eyes.

"A kiss for mah troubles, den?" he asked, matching her troublemaking smile with one of his own.

"A kiss for ze rose," she replied as she shook out her long curls a bit and smiled at him with her tongue between her teeth.

"Then maybe ol' Gambit oughta start bringin' more roses," Remy replied.

She seemed to regard him for a moment longer, still with that same smile. "You weel have to work harder," she decided at last. "Only ze first kiss ees so easily won."

Remy nodded with a little crooked grin. "Dat sound like a challenge,  _cher_."

"Maybee," she agreed with a little smile. "Perhaps next time," she added as the first evidence that she was going to float away again started up with her curls around her ears and she disappeared into the wind one more time.

But this time, Remy was not quite so empty-handed as she might have thought. He had a camera in the lining of his jacket — and now, he had her picture and her voice. With a little time, it wouldn't take him long to learn exactly who this little sneak thief was and what she was doing in New York.

He made his way back down the long driveway of the old house with his hands deep in his jacket pockets, his fingers turning the card with the kiss over and over again in one hand as he whistled old tunes to himself all the way down to where his car was parked.

This thief ... she was good. Not just her powers; she knew how to get around security systems, cameras, safes… she knew what she was doing beyond just getting  _into_ the places she meant to steal from.

Not to mention she was downright  _pretty_.

When Remy got back to the mansion, Scott met him at the door, eager to give his brother-in-law some kind of actionable intelligence beyond Remy's description of what she looked like and what she could do. Remy tipped his head toward one of the classrooms, and the two X-Men quickly set up Scott's laptop so that they could look over the video footage.

But when they pulled up the files from the camera, the images and even the voice were heavily distorted. She must have been wearing some kind of jammer to keep them from doing exactly that — and Remy leaned back in his chair and let out a little laugh.

"Dis tief — she know what she doin'," Remy said, shaking his head.

"Yeah, she's good," Scott had to admit. He sat down in the chair beside Remy and frowned for a moment. "And you can't catch her in the act?"

"Oh, ol' Remy kin catch her. It's de keepin' her in one place dat's de problem," Remy said. "We gon' need a dampenin' field to keep her where she is, or else all Remy get is a handful of air. Hard to catch de wind herself."

Scott nodded thoughtfully, staring at the heavily distorted images on his laptop before he let out a sigh and closed it. "Next time you go out to find this woman, we'll send you with a field. We're just lucky so far — you know Anton told me all the charges get dropped within a few days? If a mutant thief story hit public knowledge…" He shook his head.

"She doin' dat on purpose," Remy said with a little smile. "She ain't hit nobody who want their dirty laundry on de news. She pickin' her targets well."

"That can't go on forever. Sooner or later, someone's going to say something, and then—"

"Yeah, yeah, we gotta catch dis tief," Remy said, holding his hand up to stop Scott. "She real good, but ol' Remy'll catch her — don' you worry 'bout it."

* * *

When the end of August and the beginning of September rolled around, both of the elflings had birthdays within days of each other — so they had a joint birthday party for both Kari and Krissy, complete with both purple and pink decorations and one of Annie's gorgeous (pink) birthday cakes for the youngest of the kids in the mansion.

And of course, Krissy was in full big sister mode. This was, after all, Kari's first ever birthday, and she wanted to show her little sister the ropes on how everything worked.

"Everybody gonna hug you," Krissy explained, holding her sister's hand as they skipped down to breakfast that morning. "And they all say 'happy birthday' and you gotta say ' _danke_ ' because it's polite."

Kari grinned at Krissy as they climbed into chairs for their breakfast, and when Sying was the first to run over and give both of them hugs and 'happy birthday' wishes, Kari very carefully sang out " _danke_ " and  _beamed_ over at her proud big sister.

As the two little girls were swinging their feet and their tails over their seats and giggling together, they noticed Remy come down to get some coffee, and in a flash, Krissy had rushed over to him to hold her arms up to be picked up so she could give him a big hug and a kiss. "My mama says you being a detection just like her!"

"Your mama pretty close," Remy replied with a little smirk as he tossed her into the air.

She giggled delightedly when he caught her. "You must  _really_ like being a detection, because you really happy!"

"I'm always happy,  _petit_ ," he replied before he gave her a kiss on the cheek and set her down. "Ain't nothin' change dat."

" _I_ think you have a  _Valentine_ ," Krissy said loudly, with her hands on her hips.

"I always have  _les amoureux_ , little one," Remy said with a little laugh.

"O-kay, but I think you have a  _real_ one," Krissy said, straightening up.

"Hey, dat ain't nice to say, lil' imp," he said in an attempt to sound strict.

She giggled delightedly and tossed her hair over her shoulder very dramatically. "Papa says it gotta come out sometimes."

"What kinda ting's you teachin'  _la petite fille_ , Miss Hawk?"

Kate set down her coffee mug and held up both hands. "Oh, that one's on Kurt. That is  _not_ on me," she insisted, though she was laughing quietly.

"Don't mean you ain't a mean-hearted woman goin' 'long wit it."

Kate chuckled and scooted around the table to scoop up her little purple elfling. "She does this all on her own, sorry," she said, still chuckling and not looking the least bit sorry, though she did manage a much more stringent look once she set Krissy back down at the table and had a talk with her about prying into other people's business and using her words nicely while Krissy shifted a bit guiltily. And when she was done, Krissy did scoot over to where Remy was and gave him a little hug around the knees.

"I sorry I said mean things," she said very sincerely.

He scooped her up and gave her a kiss on the cheek before he tickled her. "You didn't mean nuttin' by it," he said with a little grin. "Trouble."

She gasped and giggled but looked very proud as she said, "That's what Logan says Mama's name is."

"When it's not Chicken Hawk," Chance muttered to Elin under his breath, which got Kate to give him a  _look_.

Once Kari had finished her breakfast, meanwhile, she seemed to be a bit put out that not everyone had given her a hug yet that morning, so the little pink elfling had taken to toddling over to whoever hadn't hugged her and would stand in front of them with a very expectant look on her face, just…  _waiting_. Most of the adults caught on quick and scooped her up to kiss, tickle, and snuggle her — but as for some of the little ones, it was more of a battle.

For the moment, Kari was stubbornly stationed in front of James, who, to his credit, looked like he knew  _exactly_ what was going on; he was just enjoying the fact that she was being so stubborn about making him come to her. She had her arms crossed, her lower lip poked out, and her tail switching irritably behind her as she kept right on waiting and waiting for the hug that her big sister had promised she would get from  _everybody_.

So, naturally, James smiled brightly, gave her a wave, and wished her 'Happy bird-day' before he started to walk past her.

She scooted over so she was in his path, arms still crossed. "And?" she prompted.

He frowned and looked between the two elflings before he looked like he remembered something and took a step forward to give her a kiss on the cheek.

At that, Kari melted into little giggles. "No, silly!" she said, shaking her head.

He looked as if she'd given him some monumental task as he sighed. "Okay," he said before he tried again — this time giving her a kiss on the mouth.

Kari dissolved into giggles all over again, blushing brightly — with her big sister not far behind in the giggles— as she shook her head again and reached over to pull James into a very sweet snuggle. She even kissed him on the cheek, still giggling. "Silly James."

"Kari has a  _boyfriend_ ," Krissy whispered loudly and happily to Elin as she was still half bent over with giggles.

"So do you," James said, pointing to Sying with no hesitation — and Sying turned positively beet red but was grinning ear to ear.

"Nu- _uh_ ," Krissy insisted, shaking her head hard as her braids bounced.

In what had to be a patented family move, James shrugged a little and tipped his head to the side. "If you say so."

"Please tell me someone recorded that," Kate whispered to K, though it wasn't immediately clear if she was talking about the little kids' interaction or the look on Kurt's face as he was starting to realize just how much trouble he was in with his little princesses.

"I … don't know," she replied. "But I'd like to see that again."

"Which part?" Kate giggled.

"Yes. Please. All of it."

Kate laughed again as Krissy vehemently shook her head at James, braids still bouncing, like she could hardly believe her ears, though he had already moved on to playing with his toys and was not giving her any more attention.

"Kwissy," Kari called out at last, trying to pull her sister over. "Now what? Hugs… now what?"

"Cupcakes," Elin said with a giggle.

Chance grinned crookedly. "Cupcakes for  _sure_ ," he agreed.

"Actually, we are having cake later," Kurt said, clearing his throat a bit to get the kids' attention. "So no cupcakes right now — but we are going to play some games while we wait for the other kids to arrive."

"I dunno; I think there's time for 'em," Logan said with a perfectly straight face as he looked Kurt's way over his mug.

Kurt gave him a  _look_. "It's still warm enough outside to play in the sprinklers,  _ja_?" he asked the kids, and they all broke out into wide grins. "Do you think the bamfs want to play water fight with you too?"

"They  _always_ want to play water fight," Krissy giggled delightedly.

"Then let's get everybody some towels and swimsuits," Scott suggested, jumping in to help Kurt with a similar expression on his own face as he and Kurt both started to usher the small mob of little ones out of the kitchen.

The two X-men and the kids had only been gone for all of a few seconds when Annie looked to Logan and, with a wide grin, asked, "Pink icing for the cupcakes, then? For Kari's birthday — and purple for Krissy too."

"Sounds like a plan," he said with a little laugh. "Kurt's gonna have a heart attack at this rate."

"Those are  _his_ genes," Kate pointed out, shaking her head over her own mug. "He can't complain that his kids are flirts."

"I think you helped a little too, Kate," Annie pointed out as she was already pulling supplies from the cabinets to get started on some cupcakes.

"Scott doesn't look too happy either," K pointed out.

"They're just kids," Annie said with a shrug. "They're learning."

"They'll grow out of it," Logan agreed.

"When I taught Kindergarten, the kids were still trying to figure out if they wanted to kiss each other or push each other off the swings. It's adorable," Annie said with a little smirk. "They'll be  _fine_."

"Besides, Annie and I can use the cupcakes  _our_ way, and those two will be fine too."

"You're welcome," Logan said with a little laugh before he too headed outside to watch the kids try to throttle each other with water.

It wasn't long before the rest of the kids and their parents showed up for the party, too, and joined right in on the sprinkler fun. Zoe dove in fully-clothed before either of her parents could stop her, and it took all of a few seconds before she and Kari were teaming up on anyone who got too close to them to tackle them in massive, wet giggles and hugs.

But Gerry went right to Tyler with a  _huge_ grin on his face, pulling on Tyler's pants leg so Tyler would crouch down to be closer to his height. "I started  _Kindergarten_ yesterday," he explained, his eyes wide with delight and awe.

"Already?" Tyler asked with a little grin.

"Yeah! And I made lots of new friends already too," Gerry said confidently. "There's lots and lots of kids my age, and my teacher is really, really nice and was really proud of me for knowing my letters so well," he said in a rush, drawing himself up even taller as he told his hero how well he was doing.

"That sounds like a lot of fun," Tyler agreed.

"Yeah, it's really neat! And we have snack time, and the girl the teacher chose to hand out the snacks today was really pretty, but I tried to tell her and she just told me I had cooties." Gerry looked a little disappointed. "I just wanted to say she was pretty because she  _is_."

"Well, she just doesn't know you yet," Tyler said reasonably.

"Yeah, I  _guess_ so," Gerry agreed as he sighed out all his breath. "Mom says I should say things like ask her about what she likes instead of just saying she is pretty so I can be her friend," he added. "So I am gonna ask her tomorrow if she likes LEGOs because I like LEGOs."

"That's a good idea," Tammy agreed over Tyler's shoulder, and Gerry beamed at her before he hugged both her and Tyler and then headed off to go play with the other kids.

Of course, he was still so excited about his day at Kindergarten that he had to tell all the other kids about it, and Krissy in particular was completely in awe of her older Hawk cousin, her eyebrows high and her mouth slightly open as he talked about going to school.

"And then she said I had cooties," Gerry finished, and by that time, he had a little more of an audience as Sying and Chance had come over as well.

"Well, you have boy cooties," Chance said diplomatically. "And girls have girl cooties. Some people don't  _like_ cooties."

"I don't want her  _cooties_ ," Gerry said, making a face at Chance. "I just wanna be nice!"

"Well maybe you just gotta give her a cookie or some fruit snacks," Sying suggested, which got Krissy to give him a bit of a sideways look. "That way, she knows you're nice."

Gerry looked skeptically over at Krissy, but she let out a sigh and had to nod her agreement. "I like cookies," she said, and Sying just beamed and nodded.

Eventually, Annie called the kids to come in, and everyone was wrestled into new clothes — including Zoe, who borrowed Krissy's old sundress, since her own clothes were too wet and her parents hadn't expected to need more than one change of clothes and they were saving the other set of clothes for the inevitable mess that the kids made of their cake and cupcakes.

Of course, when Scott saw that Annie had made a whole bunch of pink and purple-frosting cupcakes, he gave her a  _look_  — though she laughed and handed him a cupcake with a whispered, "Don't get so upset; they're just kids."

"I'm not upset," Scott said with a little frown, but that had Annie laughing at him outright.

"You're just going to have to get used to the fact that your son is a  _flirt_ ," she told him even as Chance was the first one back from changing out of his swimsuit and was  _clearly_ excited to get cupcakes.

Scott gestured wordlessly to the little boy, and Annie laughed and patted his shoulder in joking consolation. "We'll have cupcakes after Kari gets to smash her cake," she explained to Chance. "I still haven't finished putting all the icing on them."

Chance sighed out a long breath like this was a terrible imposition. "O- _kay_ ," he said before he settled into a seat at the table to watch his mom put the finishing touches on both the cupcakes and the cake.

"You should really start a business with all the baking you do," Jess suggested with a little smile as she leaned over the counter.

Annie laughed. "Maybe when I have more time," she said. "Right now, I've got my hands full just runnin' after those three kids of mine, not to mention the rest."

"Good point," Jess had to admit with a laugh. "I stay busy just trying to keep track of Gerry. I can't imagine having three of them."

"Well, I have a lot of help," Annie admitted, tipping her head at Scott, who was in the middle of wrangling Cody. The little boy had apparently decided that he didn't  _want_ to wait for Kari to be done with her cake before he had a cupcake, and he was fussing about it.

"Wanna  _cu-cake_ ," Cody insisted stubbornly as Zoe and Kari arrived together, giggling and admiring Zoe's sundress before they noticed the obstinate little boy fighting his father and shared a look with each other.

Jess had to laugh, because she absolutely recognized Natasha in the expression that passed over Zoe's face as she decided what she was going to do. In just a few strides, Zoe had crossed the room to where Cody was and gave him a little shove.

"Today Kari day," she said, sticking her finger in Cody's face. "Be nice."

"Zoe, we don't  _shove_ ," Clint said as he scooted around the table to try and pull his little redhead back from Cody, but to the surprise of both Scott and Clint, it seemed to have worked. Cody looked so surprised by Zoe getting mad at him that he shut up for a moment.

"No shove," he said at last with a little defiance.

"Be nice," she countered with her chin thrust out.

"No  _shove_."

" _Nyet_."

Scott and Clint shared a look before Clint let out a sigh and pulled Zoe aside. "Zo," he told her once he'd pulled her a little further away from her friend. "You can't shove people or hit them."

" _You_  do," she said defiantly.

"Your mom and I only hit bad guys."

" _Nyet_."

"Your mom and I only hit bad guys unless we're practicing to fight bad guys."

"Cody not nice."

"Cody's little," Clint pointed out. "He's still learning. He's  _not_ a bad guy. So we do  _not_ shove him," he said, putting a little severity in his tone that finally got her to look at least a little repentant.

"It Kari day," she muttered.

"Yes, it is. And you're a really good friend to try and make sure everything is good for her birthday, but you can't do it by being mean to people, okay? Do you think Kari wants you to be mean to her friends on her birthday?"

Zoe looked slightly abashed as she looked down at her feet and scuffed one shoe against the floor with a muttered, "No."

"And do you think it's right to tell Cody to be nice when you're the one pushing him?"

Zoe stared even harder at the ground. "No."

"So now what do you need to say to Cody?"

Zoe looked up at Clint with an expression that was bordering on disbelief and betrayal, but he held her gaze for a long time until she let out a long sigh and rolled her eyes. " _Fine_."

"Well?" Clint prompted, looking over to where Cody was with James, and Zoe pushed her lower lip out even further and looked generally like she was just not happy in the least as she made her way over.

Cody regarded her with deep suspicion when she came over to where he was, but she kept her eyes on the ground and scuffed her shoe a couple of times, looking over her shoulder three times to see if her father was still watching her before she let out a long and frustrated sigh. "I sorry," she said quickly before she glanced back at Clint and, seeing that she was off the hook, scampered off to go climb up in the seat next to Kari without a backward glance at either of the boys.

Kari, meanwhile, had been getting the rundown on how this was supposed to go from her very excited big sister.

"Miss Ammie gonna put the cake down and then you can do  _whatever you want_!" Krissy explained, throwing her hands in the air to illustrate just how cool this was.

Kari tipped her head to the side as she watched her big sister's excitement. "Kwissy too?"

Krissy shook her head, braids bouncing. "No, just for you!"

But Kari didn't look like she was entirely sure about that. She kept a little frown on her face all the way up until Annie set her cake down in front of her, and when she looked around to see that everyone was watching her, she started to sniffle a little bit before she promptly burst into inconsolable tears.

In an instant, Kurt was there to shush her, wrapping her up in his arms as he dried the tears off her cheeks very gently. " _Prinnzessin,_ what's wrong?" he asked her as he patted her back and tried to get her to calm down, and the bamfs kept teleporting close by to try and offer their own solutions — candies and toys and anything else they could think of.

Kari continued to cry, little squeaks and hitching breaths in between her screaming until she was finally able to hiccough out a little, "No Kwissy."

Kurt kept rubbing her back gently as he tried to calm her down, and Krissy watched her little sister falling to pieces with a look of deep concern until, finally, she offered, "I help?"

It took Kari a minute to get her hysterical sobs back under control as she picked her head up and looked Krissy's way before, with a pitiful little sniff, she nodded, and Kurt let the little girl back down so she could run over to her sister and join her by the cake.

Krissy reached over and grabbed Kari's hand and grinned widely at her. "It's okay," she promised her little sister, and Kari put on her very bravest face as she nodded and watched as Krissy took a little handful of the cake and held it out for Kari to see.

Kari took the handful of cake from Krissy and examined it for a moment with a little frown. "Mess," she said, wrinkling her nose.

"That why it's fun," Krissy giggled as she took another handful for herself and shoved the whole thing in her mouth at once, getting pink icing on the tip of her nose.

Kari giggled as she watched Krissy for a little longer before, gingerly, she reached out to do the same thing, shoving the mouthful into her face — much messier than her big sister did it. Her little eyebrows shot up when she started to eat the cake, though, and she broke into a little giggle. "Yummy!" she declared.

Krissy laughed and nodded. "It's for you!"

Kari looked wide-eyed, and Krissy and waited for her big sister's nod before, with a laugh, she dove into the cake with both hands, shoving little handfuls in her mouth with a delighted grin.

She didn't smash the entire cake — because after a while, she started to get full of cake and didn't want to eat any more. So instead, there was about a third of Annie's beautiful cake with little fingerprints and handfuls missing, and the rest of it was perfectly untouched. And Peter Parker was sure to get a picture of the adorably half-eaten cake for his steadily-growing collection of first birthday photography books.

"Now cupcakes?" Chance asked once Kate moved in to start cleaning Kari up, and Annie had to laugh at the hopeful look on his face.

"Yes, now it's time for cupcakes," she agreed, crouching down to hand him two — one pink and one purple — so that he could speed off to go give one of them to Elin.

"Enabler," Kate whispered Annie's way.

Annie shrugged. "I'm hoping Scott will get used to the idea that his son is a flirt  _before_ he becomes a teenager and it's a little more serious," she whispered, tipping her head toward Scott, who was watching the beginning of the cupcake kisses with a look of pure longsuffering.

Kate giggled and gestured toward Kurt. "Have you seen mine lately?" she laughed. "I think it's just dawning on him what it means to have  _daughters_."

"I'm sure my daddy'd be willing to commiserate with him if he needs it," Annie said in a conspiratory tone but with a twinkle in her eyes.

"He just might," Kate agreed with a laugh, watching as Kurt looked like he couldn't decide if he was relieved over the fact that Krissy was skillfully avoiding Sying's attempts to share a cupcake with her… or worried over the fact that Kari was all but shoving cupcakes at James with  _glee_.

"They learn from watching you guys," Clint pointed out with a little smirk.

"I know. But don't tell Kurt — I  _like_ the PDA," Kate chuckled.

Clint grinned and shook his head. "Don't worry, Katie Kate. They'll grow out of it. Give 'em another couple of years and they'll be having 'no boys allowed' clubs."

"Yeah? Well you better make sure Zoe knows about that," Kate teased, gesturing toward where the little redhead had decided to take her cupcake to someone more deserving of her cupcake kisses — and Logan now had little pink-frosting kiss marks all over his cheek from his little admirer.

"Nat's genes," Clint replied without even hesitating. "Seriously, I'm not worried."

Annie and Kate shared a look, shrugged, and then decided to go give their husbands a break, since both of them looked like they had just watched their kids age ten years with all the 'cupcake kisses' going on around the house.


	4. Out All Night on a School Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which our absolute favorite kid-word (which we now both use regularly in our vocabularies because we love it so much) is born.

 

 

Remy was once again set up in the next house that he thought his little sneak thief would hit. The safe was empty, a rose was waiting, and he was just waiting for her to come in before he started up the power dampener so she wouldn’t be able to get away from him so easily this time.

 

This house was a little further upstate, and Remy could honestly say that he enjoyed the drive up to the old place. The new couple that had moved in had swindled the old owners literally out of house and home, so he didn’t think he would weep if they were relieved of their valuables when he got there, though that seemed to be the case with most of his thief’s targets, he found. And he liked her style.

 

And he had to admit that he was looking forward to crossing paths with the pretty blonde again and having a longer conversation that didn’t end with her fading into thin air. He’d like to get a few things from her  — a name for starters, but he had more ambitious plans beyond that.

 

The old house was already drafty, not only because it was a few centuries old but also because the new owners were renovating. So Remy wasn’t sure whether the cool touch of the breeze on his cheeks and through his coat and his hair was his sneak thief or not, but he liked to believe it was. 

 

Especially because shortly after the breeze had ruffled his hair, he heard the telltale clack of a safe opening, and he hit the button on the power dampener as he stood up from his seat on the couch to lean in the doorway, his arms crossed and a smirk firmly placed on his face. 

 

“You are persistent,” she said as she turned toward him, the rose between her fingers as she shook her head with a light laugh. 

 

“You’re de one who keep comin’ back,  _ cher _ ,” he pointed out, the smirk widening when he saw her smiling at that. 

 

“No, it ees you who interferes with my work,” she laughed. 

 

“Well, das what happens when ol’ Gambit tell someone he gon’ catch a tief for dem,” Remy said with a shrug. “Cain’t let a sneak tief outdo me, even a pretty sneak tief.”

 

She laughed and took the slightest step toward him  — and then she fell into a deep frown as whatever she had been planning to do with her powers simply didn’t work. “You ‘ave a dampener,” she said, all trace of laughter gone as she looked back up at Remy. 

 

“Like I say  — cain’t let a sneak tief outdo ol’ Gambit,” Remy said. “You been cheatin’ wit those powers o’ yours, and kisses on de wind are nice, but dey ain’t as nice as de real ting.” 

 

“All this to get a kiss?” she asked, one eyebrow quirked and some of the laughter coming back into her voice. “You  _ are  _ persistent.” 

 

“You did say work harder,  _ petit _ ,” he pointed out. 

 

She let out a sigh and rolled her eyes as she took another step toward him. He kept his body language relaxed as she seemed to be studying him. “I did,” she said at last, playing the rose between her fingers.

 

He leaned against the doorframe, his smile wide as he played with a few of his playing cards, shuffling and reshuffling them as the sneak thief looked around the room, likely to try and spot where he had the dampener. 

 

“You got a name,  _ petit _ ?” he asked with a crooked grin, and she looked back his way, blinking for a moment as she sized him up once more.

 

“I do ‘ave a name,” she said at last with a playful smile that pulled at the corners of her mouth before it made it the rest of the way over her face. “But I think… you ‘ave to choose. You ‘ave given me a rose. Do you want your kiss or my name?” 

 

Remy stood up a bit straighter, smiling brilliantly as he put the cards back into his pocket, making a show of thinking it over. “You drive a hard bargain,  _ petit _ . I ask your name and you offer a kiss  —  dat is very tempting,  _ non _ ?”

 

“Take your time,” she laughed, waving a hand as she took another few steps closer to him. “I ‘ave plenty of it.” 

 

He gave her a crooked grin and, in a few steps, closed the gap between them. He swept the slender girl up tight, and she stepped into him…

 

And the next thing he knew, he was waking up with a pounding headache, laid out on the cold floor. He thought he could remember the flash of a taser of some kind, but his head was pounding too hard to remember the details clearly.

 

As he pushed himself up, he realized that there was far more of a draft than there had been before, and when he looked down, he let out a bit of a groan as he realized that the little sneak thief had stolen the coat right off his back. 

 

He could  _ not  _ let anyone know about this.

 

He sat up and held his head for a moment, looking around the room before he spotted the pristine white card with a kiss pressed into it for him.

 

Despite the situation, he couldn’t help but chuckle as he picked up the card and pocketed it. His sneak thief had a sense of humor. She had, in fact, given him a kiss for his rose. Just not in the way he’d expected with the way she had been looking at him. 

 

He stood up and straightened himself out a bit and decided he would just have to get himself a new coat on the way home before anyone asked any questions that would prove more embarrassing than the fact that he was already going to have to tell Scott that the sneak thief had gotten away from him once again because he hadn’t noticed a taser.

 

He supposed it was his own fault for noticing so much  _ else  _ about her, but he would not include that in his chat with Scott.

 

He would also  _ definitely  _ not mention to Scott that already he was looking forward to their next encounter, and not just so he could get his coat back. Though… he had to smile at the mental image of that skinny little thief wearing his coat.

 

It probably looked good on her.

 

He put his hands in his pockets, and he didn’t realize he was humming to himself until he was halfway back to his car.

Kate couldn’t help grinning as she made her way down the halls. She was quite sure that K suspected something was going on, but Kate was devious and wasn’t above using her own little girls to play distraction so that she could set up the Sweet 116 party she’d been planning to throw for K for the past few weeks. 

 

And to make matters even better, she had a  _ hilarious  _ voice message on her phone from JJ, who had gone on and on about how he was a serious journalist and it was incredibly unprofessional of her to waste his time in this way, sending him an interviewee who spent the entire time talking about his daughter and absolutely nothing else.

 

Kate was still giggling about it. 

 

She’d have to make sure to tell Logan to thank Maverick for a beautiful, beautiful birthday present, even if he and JJ had gone back and forth for months so it was a very  _ late  _ birthday present.

 

She was still grinning to herself as she put the finishing touches on the very teenage-girl themed decorations in the living room when Kurt came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist to rest his head on her shoulder. 

 

“You always look so beautiful when you’re plotting,” he teased her as he pressed a kiss to her cheek. 

 

“Hey, we didn’t do anything big last year because of all that crap with the Purple Man,” she pointed out.

 

Kurt chuckled low in her ear as he kissed her just as the base of her jaw. “Yes, and besides that, you saw an opportunity to tease,” he pointed out.

 

“I almost bought her a car, but I thought it might be too much,” Kate admitted with a wicked grin, and he laughed outright as he spun her around and pulled her into a kiss, shaking his head at her.

 

“You know our daughters are not fooling her at all,” he pointed out to her when the kiss broke, still holding her tight to him as he rested his forehead against hers and they spoke in low, gentle tones. 

 

“Yes, but that’s the best part,” Kate said with a grin as she hooked her hands around him, resting her thumbs in the belt loop of his jeans. “What are they doing?”

 

“Krissy wants K to listen to the new songs she has been learning to sing,” Kurt said with a little smile.

 

“Smart girl. She’s adorable with her high-pitched little cherub songs,” Kate said, nodding against his forehead as the two of them had clearly decided to just let the bamfs finish setting up. 

 

“Kari is trying to help by sitting on K and telling her ‘no’ every time she tries to leave her seat,” Kurt chuckled.

 

“Also a smart girl,” Kate laughed. She grinned up at Kurt underneath her eyelashes as she added with a playful little smile, “They must get it from you.”

 

“Naturally,” he agreed without hesitation before he swept her up and kissed her gently, his hands tracing the curve of her back as she stepped into him and ran just the tips of her fingers over his shoulder blades. It wasn’t until they came back up for air that he added, with a little smirk, “Of course, they get some of that from their mother.”

 

“Naturally,” she replied in such a bad imitation of his accent that he couldn’t help but laugh and pull her into an even deeper kiss. 

 

He had his hands tangled in her hair when they heard a small crash, and they both broke apart in an instant to find a sheepish-looking bamf who had been trying to hang a boy band poster and had instead toppled over with not only the poster but the little box of tacks  — and had knocked over the chair that Kate had been using as a stool to reach the ceiling so she could hang the sparkly streamers.

 

Kurt and Kate glanced at each other and then the little bamf before Kate let out a sigh and kissed Kurt’s cheek. “We’ll pick that up later,” she told him with a twinkle in her eye, and he laughed and nodded before he teleported over to help the little fallen bamf gather himself.

 

In a matter of a few minutes, they had finished the rest of the decorations, and Kurt teleported over to where Kate was to kiss her once more before he grinned at her. “I’ll go round up the party guests,” he said. 

 

“And I’ll go find the guest of honor,” she agreed with a little smirk, returning the kiss before he teleported away with the bamfs to start bringing people to the living room.

 

When Kate found her little girls and K, she couldn’t help but laugh, because it was clear that their distraction tactics had moved on from the usual and now consisted of trying desperately not to get tickled by K, who had clearly had enough of whatever mission the two elflings had been sent on and was going to tickle them into cutting it out.

 

And, of course, both girls only responded by tickling her right back, when they were able to, though K had a pretty good grip on both of them.

 

It was a mark of how much better control Krissy had over her tail that the older Wagner girl managed to sneak around K’s grip to tickle her sides with the tip of her tail, and she giggled delightedly when K raised her eyebrows at the purple elfling and snatched her up closer to tickle her harder, all while Kari tried valiantly to help her sister even though K had her basically tucked under one arm.

 

When Kate couldn’t help but laugh as she watched the ongoing tickle fight, K looked up at her and leveled her finger at her. “I’m getting you next, Chicken Hawk,” she declared.

 

Kate held up both her hands and laughed as she went to go rescue her little girls. Kari all but hid behind Kate as soon as her mom was close enough for hiding, and K let Krissy think that she had escaped all on her own as she scooted over to Kate. 

 

When the giggling had subsided and the girls stopped actively hiding, K gave Kate a little look. “You’re about as subtle as Annie, sending in the sweet little elflings like that,” she accused her.

 

Kate laughed. “Hey, you gotta work with what you got,” she said with an unapologetic shrug as she picked up Kari, who was tired out from all the laughing and excitement and was half curled into her mom’s neck, one hand resting on Kate’s cheek as she let out a loud yawn despite the fact that she was obviously trying valiantly to stay awake. 

 

“I’m assuming since you’re here now, you’re calling off your distractions?”

 

“They’ll still be around to tickle you into submission, won’t you, girls?” Kate teased, and she had to laugh when Kari nodded tiredly and Krissy gave her two enthusiastic thumbs up.

 

K gave Kate such a  _ look _ , but Krissy seemed to have realized that it was time for the party, because she grabbed hold of K’s hand and started to pull. “You gotta come. You  _ gotta _ ,” Krissy insisted as she pulled, and Kate valiantly pretended that she couldn’t see the expression on K’s face as she outright encouraged Krissy to lead the way.

 

When they finally got to the living room, Krissy made sure to jump through the door and throw both arms out wide as she declared, “Ta da!”

 

For a moment, K just… stared at what Kate had done to the living room. She had clearly gone all out on the “Sweet Sixteen” theme, with teeny bopper posters and such dotting the walls and a “sweet sixteen” banner that Kate had clearly had customized so that it reflected the correct age  — plus one hundred years.

 

There were also “Sweet Sixteen” balloons everywhere, and it looked like someone had taken a Sharpie to  _ every single one of them  _ to add a “1” in front of the “16” so that it said “116.” 

 

Add to that the fact that the cake was made in the shape of a car…. K had to shake her head, though she didn’t get to say anything to Kate, because as soon as she arrived and had five seconds to look around the room and see what it was Kate had done... most of the mansion residents were there to offer their birthday wishes and their own brand of teasing.

 

“I let Hawkeye borrow half my Sweet Sixteen stuff from over the summer,” Sophia said with a little grin.

 

“Yeah, and the boy band posters are from Brye’s cousin. She’s super into that kind of stuff,” Leslie Ann chimed in.

 

“What in the world possessed you?” K asked as she looked over at Kate with a little laugh - one arm draped around both Sophia and Leslie Ann. 

 

“I was inspired. Plain, simple, pure inspiration, my friend,” Kate said airly, though she was grinning ear to ear. 

 

“That … that is entirely the wrong car, by the way,” K said with a smirk as she took a swipe of frosting and just looked at it. “But points for effort.” 

 

“What, you don’t want a car for your Sweet Sixteen?” Kate teased. 

 

“Oh, at that age, I wanted a Model T. Fastest thirty five miles an hour you ever had in your  _ life _ . But there were no drivers licenses then either.” 

 

“Fair point,” Kate laughed. She readjusted Kari a bit as the little girl was tiredly grinning at K. “What do you think, Kari? Do you think Aunt K should get a Model T?”

 

“Mmhmm,” Kari said, nodding along, content to have some fruit snacks and try valiantly to stay awake.

 

“Maybe if she saves up her allowance,” Kate teased K’s way. 

 

“I doubt you could even find one, sweetie  — though that is  _ not _ a challenge,” K clarified. 

 

“I love that you know me so well,” Kate giggled. 

 

“I know better than to leave a door like that open is all,” K said with a laugh as Tyler came over to pick her up in a hug. 

 

As everyone made sure to wish the birthday girl well and get in their teasing, Lorna made her way over to where Kitty and Storm were seated apart from everyone else. Just looking at Storm, no one would have known that she felt even the slightest bit inconvenienced, though she had not moved an inch from where Forge had gently set her on the couch so that she could be part of the party without having to move. But Kitty was clearly miserable; she kept turning her nose up at the cake that the kids kept trying to offer her. Sying in particular was  _ very  _ concerned that the two pregnant women might get left out of the sweets because they were so far removed, and he kept coming back to ask “Are you sure?”

 

Kitty had just sent the persistent little boy off one more time when Lorna sat down on her other side and rested a hand on her arm. “How are you feeling?” she asked.

 

Kitty just looked at Lorna with one eyebrow raised and blew out all her breath. “Like someone is stomping all over me. Which they  _ are _ ,” she said, glancing pointedly down at her stomach as Storm let out a little chuckle beside her. 

 

“Do you know if you’re going to be sticking around for long after the baby is born?” Lorna asked curiously as she leaned back into the couch, settling in to watch the party for a while.

 

“We’re not sure,” Kitty admitted. “Peter’s got his duties as a Guardian of the Galaxy, but it’s pretty lonely in space for a kid…” She pushed out her lower lip, and Lorna reached over to give her a little encouraging squeeze.

 

“You’ll figure out what works best for you,” Lorna assured her. She tipped her head toward where Erik was playing with the twins and Magda. All three kids were entirely engrossed in their coloring books, and Magda had insisted that Erik share one with her as she happily laid on her stomach with her feet kicking up in the air behind her. “We tried staying in Hawaii, but every time we came here, Magda just had such a good time with her cousins and her grandfather… it seemed like a shame to separate them.”

 

“Yeah,” Kitty had to agree as she followed Lorna’s gaze. But then she let out a sigh. “It’s kinda different, though. I mean, with you guys, you were just doing your own thing. Peter’s got a whole team to lead…”

 

Lorna rested a hand on Kitty’s arm. “It’s alright. You’ll figure it out,” she said.

 

“I mean, at the  _ very  _ least, we’re going to be seriously stepping up our visits to Earth,” Kitty said. “Every holiday we can manage, and maybe some birthdays… and you know if he’s a mutant, he’ll be going here.”

 

“Of course he will,” Storm said as if the very idea that Kitty’s son would go anywhere but the institute was an insult. 

 

“And he’ll probably be leading the X-Men by the time he graduates,” Lorna teased with a little smirk. “After all, he has natural leadership from his  _ father _ .”

 

Kitty laughed at that and leaned further back into the couch. “Yeah, well, we’ll have to see how it goes. We’ve sort of been playing this whole thing by ear since the beginning  — why stop now?”

 

“You know you always have a home here if you decide that’s what you want to do,” Storm said with a soft smile. 

 

“We’ll see,” Kitty said, worrying her teeth over her bottom lip as she said it. She watched Peter Quill playing with James  — who had learned that Peter would dangle him upside down if he ran fast enough toward Peter that he was the one to scoop him up  — and let out a sigh. “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss this place and if I said these last few months haven’t been amazing.”

 

“No reason you can’t be on two teams at once,” Lorna pointed out. “As I understand it, half of your roster has done that at one time or another.”

 

“Yeah, but the Avengers are  _ much  _ closer to home than the Guardians,” Kitty chuckled out. She shook her head. “No, we’ll figure it out. But don’t worry about it.”

 

“At least tell me you’re going to bring him back for his first birthday,” Lorna said with a little smirk. “We’ve had a few of those lately, and I think I’m enjoying them far too much.”

 

“You know what to do about that, right?” Kitty asked with one eyebrow raised.

 

Lorna chuckled and leaned back, watching the group of Summers kids with her father, though she fell into a bit of silence and seemed to be thinking it over as she did so. 

 

The party started to draw to a close  — at least for those with little ones who needed to be put to bed. Kari had long ago zonked out on Kate’s shoulder after her busy day playing distraction to K, but she had slept soundly through the entire party as Kate did everything one-handed. Krissy, on the other hand, was standing in the middle of the living room tiredly rubbing her eyes and absolutely  _ refusing  _ to admit that she was too tired to play anymore, even though she didn’t want to do  _ anything  _ the bamfs offered to play with her. 

 

Finally, Kurt swept up the little girl and teleported away with her before she could cause too much of a scene  — and from there, most of the parents started to do the same with their kids, making sure to give K one last round of birthday wishes on the way.

 

“Happy birthday, old lady,” Kate said with a chipper smile on her way out the door.

 

“Yeah, thanks. Oh and hey  — I’m going out for a while. Got a hot date,” K teased. 

 

“Don’t stay out too late, now,” Kate replied with her best motherly expression. 

 

“Oh, I’m staying out all night. Maybe even tomorrow night too.” 

 

Kate put her free hand on her hip. “Now you listen here, honey, you can’t go out all night with a boy. It’s a  _ school night _ .”

 

“Oh. He’s not a  _ boy _ . He’s _ nineteen years older _ . Married. It’s scandalous.”  

 

“That’s it  — I’m giving Kurt a shotgun,” Kate said, laughing a bit. 

 

“He’ll have to find us first. Good luck with that,  _ Mom. _ ” 

 

Kate rolled her eyes but, still playing along, made it a point to kiss K on the forehead. “Curfew is still ten o’clock, young lady.”

 

“Ten o’clock next Wednesday. Got it.” 

 

Kate was unable to stop laughing as she shook her head at K. “Oh, I hope yours are just like this. Just so I can watch.” 

 

“Are we still play acting? I can’t tell,” K said as Logan led her out toward the door. 

 

“Neither can I,” Kate laughed. “See you at coffee, kids.” 

 

“Don’t wait up,” K said with a final wave before they did, indeed slip outside into the dark.

The next morning, it was clear that Kate had recruited Kurt for a bit of her teasing, because he had a wide smirk on as he sat down next to Logan the next morning at coffee. It was clear that Logan hadn’t slept much by the tired, almost grumpy expression he was wearing as he read his paper. But Kurt managed to rein in  his amusement before he gave Logan his sternest look and drew himself up tall. “What are your intentions with my sweet little girl?” he asked Logan severely. “You were out all night with her!”

 

Logan took a moment to put together what exactly Kurt was talking about, though the little chuckle from K as she leaned in a little closer and nuzzled into Logan’s shoulder was all he really needed to play along too. “Pretty sure there’s nothin’ I can tell you  _ honestly  _ that you wanna hear.” 

 

Kate was dying by the counter, barely keeping her laughter in check as she tried very hard to look scandalized, and Kurt simply looked thunderous. “She’s only  _ sixteen _ !” he said, sounding highly affronted. 

 

“Can’t tell,” Logan replied without missing a beat before he pulled K a little closer  — and she was amazingly keeping a straight face as well. 

 

“You should be ashamed of yourself,” Kurt said sternly. “Nineteen years older  — the very thought!”

 

At that, Kate positively fell apart laughing behind him, though Kurt, ever the consummate actor, was entirely straight-faced about the whole thing. 

 

“I’m gonna stick with proud,” Logan replied with a smirk. “Though I’d like to ask about that gap you’re dealing with … “ 

 

“Never you mind, young man,” Kurt said, clearly enjoying himself even though his entire expression was stern. “This is about the virtue of  _ my  _ little girl!”

 

“I got her all liquored up too,” Logan told him. 

 

“Have you no shame?” Kurt asked, thunderous. 

 

“Not even a little bit,” K said with a grin. “He has  _ absolutely nothing  _ to be ashamed of, either,” K continued as she gave Logan a little squeeze. 

 

“You stay out of this, young lady,” Kate said through tears of laughter. “You’re so grounded.” 

 

“I’ll just take her outta here and liquor her up again,” Logan offered. 

 

“You will  _ not _ ,” Kurt said in his most highly-offended tone. 

 

“Stay here and liquor up?” Logan tried. “Save the travel time anyhow.” 

 

By then, the whole little play had a bit of an audience, and most of the X-Men in the room were either in states like Kate, dying of laughter, or a bit more like Scott, who looked like he couldn’t believe they were being this ridiculous.

 

But Sying’s reaction was by far the best as he climbed up onto the table and sat down between Logan and Kurt with a very concerned expression. “Why you fightnin?” 

 

Logan looked up at Kurt with one eyebrow raised, curious to see how he’d handle this little situation or if he was clever enough to keep it going. 

 

“This isn’t a fight  — it’s a discussion,” Kurt said patiently, though he was smirking Logan’s way. 

 

“You gettnin mad, though,” Sying said with a frown as K turned Logan’s head her way just to kiss him and let Kurt hang to handle the big questions. 

 

But Sying looked so  _ sincerely  _ concerned that Kurt had to let out a sigh and pull the little guy into a hug. “I’m not mad at Logan. He’s my best friend  — we’re just pretending,” he assured the little boy. “See how Kate is laughing? It’s all a silly show.” 

 

Sying wrinkled his nose a bit. “It’s not silly to get mad at people,” he told Kurt. 

 

“It is when Kurt is pretending to be my dad,” K told him finally when she turned his way. “That’s just ridiculous.” 

 

Sying giggled and nodded. “Okay,  _ that  _ is silly,” he had to agree. “You’re Grammy K!”

 

“I know! And he thinks I don’t need a cupcake,” she said while she readjusted how she was curled into Logan. 

 

Sying glanced at Kurt and then at Logan and K. “That’s silly too,” he decided. “You  _ gotta  _ have cupcakes. Unless you’re like Gerry’s friend and don’t like cooties.”

 

“Hear that,  _ Dad _ ?” K said as she rolled her shoulder to her ear. “Even the little guy gets it.” 

 

“You should be ashamed, using this sweet little boy for your own ends,” Kurt shot back without hesitation. 

 

K waved Sying over so he was between the two of them for serious snuggles. “Should I be ashamed?” K whispered to Sying. 

 

“For what?” he whispered back. “For cupcakes?”

 

“For having you point out that Kurt has his tail in a twist,” she whispered back even softer, though Logan laughed a bit. 

 

Sying thought it over for a bit, his lower lip poked out as he furrowed his brow until, suddenly, he broke into a huge grin and leveled his finger at her. “ _ Sha-shamed _ , K!” he said in a dramatic voice. 

 

She let out a fake gasp and started to tickle him between little kisses on his forehead. “ _ So _ much like your father.” 

 

“And he knows it,” Kurt said, chuckling. 

 

“I suddenly feel like we should find out if there  _ is  _ anything we can do to be properly ashamed,” K laughed, looking at Logan with a smirk. 

 

“Well, Storm’s little one  _ is  _ going to need a playmate,” Kate piped up from where she was still half bent over from laughing. 

 

“This is true,” K laughed. “You should do something about that.” 

 

“You’re the one looking for shameful things to do,” Kate pointed out. 

 

“Gimmie your car, Kurt,” Logan said with a grin. “I’ll figure somethin’ out.” 

 

“I’m too young to be a grandfather,” Kurt said with mock horror  — even as he was handing Logan the keys.

 

“Thanks for the coffee,  _ Dad _ ,” Logan said as he got up and tossed K over his shoulder again. “We’ll be back eventually.” 

 

Kurt was chuckling by then as he waved them off, with Sying chiming in helpfully, “No being sha-shamed!” 


	5. Little Stormy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Storm's baby girl makes her debut and everything is adorable.
> 
> There is also a hint of not-fluff but shh we're ignoring that.

 

It had been years —  _years_ — since Mystique had been stranded on that god-forsaken island with Azazel, years since he pulled her into a spell that took her will from her. And she really had thought she was rid of him.

It had been a relief after she infiltrated the institute with Azazel only to find that purple little brat alive and married to Kurt — because despite her failure to kill Wolverine, the X-Men at least had the sanity and intelligence to separate her from Azazel, and she hadn't heard a thing from him since she broke herself out of prison only a few months after she'd been locked up. Longer than her usual record, to be sure, but it had taken her at least the first few weeks to determine that he wasn't going to show up and demand something  _else_ of her.

She'd been able to get back to something like normalcy, thankfully, for a while. Her professional reputation had taken a bit of a hit after she disappeared after the  _disaster_ that had been the Bishop case on live television, but it took her little to no time to get that sorted, including a visit to Masque herself when she found out where the woman was being held to make sure she regretted putting a dark stain on her reputation — though someone had clearly beaten her to it, if the barely-healed marks when she got started were any indication.

And then, almost two years ago now, it had started up again.

At first, it was negligible. Just a sort of nagging feeling that she should try to find Azazel again. She chalked it up to sleep deprivation from a long job and didn't pay it much attention until the nagging feeling turned more insistent.

By the summer, it was in her dreams, and by the fall, she could only keep it from her waking thoughts by concentrating. She  _had_ to find him, and it was getting harder and harder to ignore.

By the time a year of that feeling had gone by, she finally gave in and put her considerable talents to use looking for him, and that at least held the feeling at bay — for a while.

But after another few months of finding  _nothing_ in any prisons, any islands, any records, it was clear that whatever this spell was had now bypassed her thinking mind, and she found herself making plans she didn't remember making, waking up having traveled closer to where Azazel must have been.

And the trail finally,  _finally_  stopped at the mansion. Of  _course_ it did.

It wasn't hard to slip in during the summer while Wolverine and his little pack were off to parts unknown to investigate, but to her frustration, she found…  _nothing_.

No cells. No records. No traces.

It was driving her insane — literally.

By that time, it had gotten to the point where she felt physically ill if she was too far from the mansion grounds, with the spell pulling her that way. It was clear that whatever trouble Azazel had found himself in that would have kicked the blood magic into overdrive like this, it had to be resolved at that ridiculous school.

Only, he simply  _wasn't there_.

But that didn't matter to the spell. It consumed nearly her every thought — when she wasn't trying desperately to find a way to just make it  _stop_ , to figure out where he was and kill him so maybe then this would  _go away_.

The only solution she could think of was that someone in that school knew where he was. So it seemed she was just going to have to have a talk with Kurt.

* * *

Remy was coming to look forward to every new game of cat and mouse with his little sneak thief, and he had a new haircut as a smile and a rose waiting for her in the safe as usual as he stretched out in the luxurious penthouse apartment of a woman who had been married to the original owner of the place for all of a year before he 'mysteriously' died.

It was exactly the kind of place she would hit, and it had been a while since he last saw her. She was due.

He didn't want to wait until she had opened the safe, either, and he was sure to have a clear line of sight to it in case she decided that it was no longer worth it to play their little games after he had used the power dampener last time. She had seemed incredibly put out by it, but it was a fair move when she was so impossible to pin down.

He spent most of the evening playing Solitaire, but as the evening stretched on into night and then into morning, he found himself settling into a bit of a frown. Where was she?

He had been right in all his predictions thus far about where she would go, and he had been sure that even if she didn't stay to chat with him, she would at least  _show_ her pretty face.

He frowned as he saw the first light of morning touch the windows of the apartment, and he gathered up his cards, looking around the place one last time. "Where you go,  _cher_?" he asked to himself, shaking his head as he made one last sweep of the place before he finally had to admit that he must have gotten this one wrong — somehow.

He shook his head to himself as he made his way back to his car, hands in his pockets. What had he missed? This was the perfect target — rich, underhanded, and with the kind of secrets that could be exploited to keep anyone from pressing charges. The security systems were top-notch, and the safe was one of her favorite types.

So what had gone wrong?

Remy was still chewing it over in his head when he turned down the street where he had parked his car — far from the apartment building. And then, suddenly, a gust of wind blew right through him and settled into the front seat of his convertible, where the blonde sneak thief made herself comfortable, her feet resting on his dashboard and her hands behind her head.

She was wearing the coat she had stolen from him, too, and she looked good in it. She'd clearly had it taken in so that it hugged her figure, and even though Remy was still smarting a bit from the blow to his ego, he had to admit that she wore the look well.

And there was just something about seeing a beautiful woman in his clothes….

"You like de coat,  _petit_?" he asked with a sideways grin.

She straightened the lapels with a little smirk and tipped her head at him. " _Merci beaucoup_ ," she said, snuggling deeper into the coat.

"It look good on you. I tink you keep it,  _non_?" he said, still with that same sideways grin as he leaned against the side of the car, halfway bent over so he could be closer to her and could properly make sure she saw the look he was giving her.

She laughed lightly but didn't move except to push a bit of her hair back from her face. "I don't like dampeners," she said with one eyebrow raised. "And why do you keep trying to catch me? Ze police 'ave dropped ze case. No one presses charges. It is the same everywhere I go — and still you follow me."

"Mebbe ol' Gambit jus' want to see a pretty sneak tief in his coat. Is dat so bad?" he asked with a shrug and a sparkle in his eyes.

She considered him for a moment with her head tipped to one side before a slow smile started at the corner of her mouth. "You wasted a rose tonight. I am sorree," she said, though she didn't look the least bit apologetic.

"Don't worry 'bout it none," he told her, leaning still further forward as just grinned wider. "I kin tink of other tings to give a pretty ting in such a nice coat as yours."

She laughed as she faded into the wind, and the breeze picked up all around him — fluffing his hair, his coat, his shirt — before she re-formed again, this time on the sidewalk, his deck of cards in her fingers as she raised an eyebrow at him with a playful sort of smirk.

"You cheatin' sometin' fierce,  _cher_ ," he laughed, subtly pressing his hands in his pockets to be sure the cards were the  _only_ thing she had taken — and they were.

"So I can keep up with  _old Gam-bit_ ,  _non_?" she teased.

He grinned that much wider at her. "You wanna learn a few tricks dat don't need no powers, you jus' let me know."

At that, she laughed at him before she was once again a breeze through his hair, his clothes — and then she was solid again and pressing a kiss to his lips, already half tangled in him by the time she re-formed. And when he just pulled her tighter, it was like holding sand when she was still forming, impossible to hold and then suddenly warm and close.

And then all at once, she was gone again, a whirl of wind through his hair and his coat, with the ace of hearts from his deck left in the front seat with her kiss still fresh.

Remy couldn't help but grin all the way through his drive back to the mansion, lost in the memory of a very passionate kiss — though once he arrived at Westchester, it was immediately clear something was wrong.

The sky was an eerie shade of green, the clouds lined with an almost silver gray, and when he got to the mansion itself, there was a tornado on the lawn. But seeing as there was no sign of anyone attacking the mansion, he knew almost immediately what was going on.

Storm was having her baby.

Remy burst into the doors of the mansion and ran right for the med bay — either to yell at Hank for not having Storm there already or to try to help her if he could; he wasn't sure yet. And he had only just burst inside when the loud thunder finally stopped — at about the same time the power went out.

He called out for anyone, but it was almost like the mansion was simply emptied out. No one was around that he could find, and there was no immediate sign as to what had happened to them.

As he pressed his way in the dark, he finally made it down to the medical bay, which was illuminated at least by some emergency power separate from the main power to the mansion. But when he peered inside and it was clear that whatever Hank had given Storm had finally taken effect — and that she was far more settled — Remy figured he would just leave them their privacy as he went on to look for the other mansion residents.

As it turned out, they were all in the ready rooms in the sub-levels, packed in and watching movies and waiting out the storm where it was safe even if Storm did accidentally level the main part — and there were various groups of students and staff alike making the most of the blackout.

"Pick a room and wait it out, Remy," Lorna told him. "K was trying to pick at Kate earlier. She said she was going to start a baby fight club."

"Well, dat depend on de mood Miss Kate in, don't it?" Remy asked with a little smirk as he sat down in the nearest seat and closed the door to the ready room behind him. "If she feelin' like playin', she see how far it goes."

* * *

When the wind had suddenly picked up and the clouds rolled in on an otherwise beautiful day at the mansion, most of the residents knew exactly what was going on. Anyone with little ones gathered them up to head to one of the ready rooms so they could all be together to watch movies and wait out the storm.

Noh was the first to get there with little Sying, far ahead of the rest of them, though, because the little guy's ears were still sensitive and he hadn't quite learned how to deal with very loud noises. He was curled up in his dad's lap with his hands over his ears and whimpering the slightest bit when the thunder started up by the time the rest of them got there — and both Charlie and Krissy looked very concerned as they ran over to their curled-up little friend.

"It's okay. It's just a thunderstorm," Charlie said, patting Sying's head as Scott closed the door and Jubilee found one of Sying's favorite  _Star Wars_ movies that they could watch to calm him down.

"Loud," Sying sniffled from underneath Noh's arm, and Krissy climbed up into Noh's lap to just hold his hand and sit with him until he stopped whimpering and started watching  _Star Wars_  with the rest of them.

The littlest ones were a bit on edge too, not just because of the thunder but because they had picked up on the fact that something was  _up_ , and Kari kept glancing at her big sister with a look of pure jealousy that  _she_ was not getting her hand held during such a scary time until finally Kate set her down so she, too, could climb up on Noh. And Noh, of course, took both elflings and Sying into a deeper snuggle once everyone was properly holding one of Krissy's hands.

Elin was a little bit grumpy, because she  _liked_ the storms and thunder and lightning, but she stayed on her Dad's lap, snuggled into him. After all, the twins were trying to help with Cody, and the movie was  _boring._

But after a while, even Sying started to settle out, though every once in a while he would tense as he could hear something the other kids couldn't. But it was his favorite movie, and he had an elfling on either side of him, so why would he be sad?

They were just working up to Sying's favorite part of the movie, when Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker had a lightsaber fight, and he was frantically shushing the adults in the room who had started up a few quiet whispered conversations as he watched the screen — and then, suddenly, all the power went out.

And just like that, the kids were in hysterics.

"How long do you think this will go on?" Jubilee asked.

"Likely until Hank is able to get her numb," Noh said over the top of three terrified kids' heads.

"They're scared," Elin said quietly into Logan's ear. "And loud."

He nodded and shushed her a little bit. "Not a thing we can do about it," Logan replied just as quietly.

Of course, the chorus of two squeaky, scared elves on either side of Sying wasn't exactly helping the little boy, and Kate made her way over by her cell phone flashlight to take the girls off of Noh's hands as Sying retreated again, though when the kids started to quiet down again with the cell phone flashlights making it a little less dark, those without enhanced hearing could finally hear that Noh was very quietly singing 60s love ballads under his breath to calm Sying down.

"Give 'im some backup Jubes," Logan directed.

Jubilee smirked his way for a second. "If you and K join in, we'll have the full quartet."

"Not happening," K said with a little smirk. "But an admirable try."

Noh chuckled a bit between songs and tipped his head at Jubilee for her to come join him, and Sying was beaming when both of his parents started in on "Be My Baby."

"Maybe this will bring them some glitter," K whispered very softly in Kate's ear. "Re-doing their vows every time they turn around."

"Well, they  _are_ trying to make Sying happy," Kate whispered back and pretended she didn't see the little smirk that Noh was trying to hide while he was singing as he clearly overheard them.

"Maybe if you and Annie bring the little ones closer and just rub them on him, it'll work like static electricity …" K suggested.

Kate seemed to consider this before she set down both of her little girls with a whispered, "I think Sying needs a hug," before the two elflings toddled off to go climb into both Jubilee's and Noh's laps for maximum cuddling. Krissy even tried to help in some of the singing.

"Gotta rub your faces on them," K suggested.

"Why?" Krissy asked. "That's silly."

"I'll make you pancakes tomorrow," K promised. "You can squish the berries."

Krissy's entire face lit up at the promise, and she immediately started to rub her furry little face into Jubilee, giggling delightedly when Kari started to follow her big sister's lead — which only had Sying giggling at them both.

"Can I squish berries too?" he asked as he tried to earn it by rubbing his face on his dad's chest.

"You can help me make the whipped cream," K promised.

He beamed even brighter at that as Kurt shook his head at K. "You're terrible," he accused her.

"Get off my back, Dad," K shot back.

"Someone has to keep you in line," he countered without hesitating, the grin widening.

"Yes, he does," K replied before she gave Logan a kiss. "But he doesn't have more luck with it than you do."

"Gerry says that's how you get cooties," Krissy said, wrinkling her nose.

"We're married. We share cooties," Logan said.

"That's gross," Krissy said, still with her nose wrinkled.

"Pretty sure you won't be sayin' that in ten years," Logan replied.

"Nu-uh. Cooties are gross," Krissy insisted, and Kate didn't bother to hide the wide grin she was shooting Kurt's way. "Cooties are gross  _forever_."

"Yes, they are,  _Prinzessin_ ," Kurt agreed with a little gleam in his eyes.

"Always playing favorites," K muttered to Logan very softly. "No wonder I went for an older man." She looked Sying's way before she raised her voice. "I guess Krissy doesn't want any more cupcakes."

" _Nu-uh, nein,_ no! That's not what I say!" Krissy insisted quickly as Kari burst into little giggles at the look on Sying's face at that.

"It's okay, Sying. Maybe Elin will share with you instead," K said consolingly.

"Elin's  _my_ Valentine," Chance insisted with a stubborn look on his face. "Sying can share with Zoe."

"I wanna cupcake by myself," Krissy said grumpily, her arms folded over her chest.

"That's no fun," Elin said with a frown. "I share with you too," she decided as she nodded Krissy's way.

Krissy seemed to consider this and then nodded. "Okay. That works."

"There. Now everyone is happy," Kate said with a little laugh.

It wasn't too much longer when Logan managed to slip out from under Elin and made his way to the door. "I'm going to make sure lightning didn't take out the lab somehow," he said. "You comin', Elf?"

Kurt broke into a grin and nodded as he grabbed hold of Logan's arm and teleported them up to the lab — in case opening the door would let the loud thunder back in.

When they appeared near the doors of the lab, all was quiet, and calm, though Storm didn't sound surprised in the least to see them.

"I knew you two would be the first to come by," she said with a little weary smile.

Kurt and Logan glanced at each other with wide grins as they realized that not only had the storm passed but Forge had a little pink blanket and was looking brighter than he ever had.

"He couldn't keep away," Logan said with a smirk. "Got smart and brought a lightning rod along."

"Of course he did," Storm said with a little smirk before she tipped her head to indicate they should come over. "Come and meet Amadi. She looks just like her father."

The two men shared a glance and stepped nearer to Forge to take a peek, though Kurt was a bit closer, so naturally, Logan made his way over to Storm to give her a little kiss on the forehead and congratulate her.

"You doin' alright, darlin'?" he asked quietly.

"Tired," she said. "And a little embarrassed."

"Can't hold back the weather, right?" He teased before he gave her hand a little squeeze. "She's perfect, just like her mother."

"Of course she is," Storm said, smiling a bit as she watched Forge gently hand the little curly-headed girl to Kurt, who was grinning crookedly at not just the tiny bundle but the shock-white color of her curls.

"You want me to go get anyone in particular?" Logan asked.

Storm smiled and shook her head. "If you could just tell everyone the coast is clear and they can come out now. Whoever wants to come, let them come. Amadi isn't shy." She tipped her head at where Amadi was watching the world with wide eyes trying to take everything in. "At all."

"I'll do that," he said with a nod before he turned to leave them with Kurt grinning at the little girl. When he got to the movie party, he just stuck his head in the door and smiled. "Hey, Jubes. You're up. The little one's here."

"Baby Storm?" Sying asked with wide eyes as Noh and Jubilee got to their feet, both elflings sticking close by, though Sying was still curled into his dad.

"That's right," Logan said. "Kurt's down there right now makin' friendly." He gave Kate a significant look for just a moment that K had to snicker at, and Kate rolled her eyes at him.

"Mama, we gotta go  _see_ ," Krissy insisted as she tugged on Kate's jeans, pointing toward the door.

"Yes, I guess we do," Kate said when both of her little girls started clamoring to follow Noh and Jubilee — and so the whole lot of them ended up trekking down to the med bay together.

When they arrived, both elflings went straight to Storm to give her hugs and snuggles, because, as Kari said, "tired Storm" needed them. But Kurt handed Jubilee the little pink bundle and didn't bother to pretend he wasn't grinning when he saw her melt at the little curls and long fingers and the big, big eyes trying to take in everything.

"She's beautiful," Noh said over Jubilee's shoulder as Sying nodded his awed agreement, his head tipped to the side as he watched the cute little one curiously.

Jubilee looked up and caught the look on Noh's face and cleared her throat a bit as she handed Amadi to Kate to hold next. "Yeah, the Maker is on a roll," she joked.

"Maybe he needs to pass on the torch," Storm said without missing a beat.

"Not it," Kate said and looked over at Jubilee, who just  _glared_.

"Not who I was looking at anyhow," Forge said with his arms crossed.

Jubilee looked defensively around the room at  _everyone_ but had a hard time coming up with anything when Sying asked, "Are all baby sisters this pretty?"

"Yes, sweetheart, they are," Jubilee said quietly.

"Mine will be prettier," he said decisively with a little nod that had Kurt laughing outright.

"Well, I hope you get to compare soon," Forge said with a warm smile as he ruffled Sying's hair.

"Is that why you wanted me down here first? For the picking?" Jubilee asked as she tried to glare a bit at her friends and family.

"I didn't ask for anyone specific," Storm said. "I only requested that Logan spread the word." Jubilee looked a bit irritated for a moment, then shook her head as she muttered out something about 'sneaky ferals'.

"Inna see," Krissy whispered, pulling on Noh's pant leg — since Kate was holding Amadi.

Noh scooped her up with a smile with the arm that wasn't holding Sying so she could say hello, with Kari scrambling up in Kurt's arms to do the same as the girls giggled in perfect unison, tails waving lazily behind them.

Krissy looked between Amadi and Sying and scrunched her nose. "Your sissy gonna have white hair too," she said with a decisive nod. "Like you."

"No, she gonna look like Mom," Sying countered.

The two of them fell into an argument right there in Noh's arms for a while as Kate gently handed Amadi back to a grinning Forge, and it wasn't long before Kate and Noh had to separate them and take them out of the room so they'd stop being so stubborn and disruptive while the Summers clan headed in to say hello.

The twins of course came over to very shyly say hello, but Annie started to giggle madly when Cody stared open-mouthed at Amadi. "Mommy," he whispered in a clearly awe-struck tone. "Mommy.  _Wow_."

"Just like your father," Annie said with a chuckle.

"She's got your hair," Scott said with a smirk Storm's way, which seemed to be all the prompting Forge needed to make sure Scott got a turn to cuddle the little girl too.

Annie started to laugh when Scott's expression looked almost  _exactly_ like Cody's as two of her favorite men stared in awe at the new little addition to the family.

"She's very pretty," Charlie told Storm in a shy voice as she patted Storm's hand. "You did a very, very good job."

"We're gonna help her learn letters when she gets big," Chance agreed; he didn't seem to heed Annie's directions to leave Storm alone and actively climbed up into the bed to snuggle her — though Storm gladly pulled him into a snuggle and kissed the top of his head..

Once Annie had set Cody down so she could take a turn holding the little one, Forge shared a look with Storm for a moment before he grinned. "You think K and Logan's little ones want to meet her too?"

"I think he's trying to avoid exactly that," Storm said with a little laugh. "He didn't even touch her when he was in here."

Chance and Scott both had matching looks at that, though Chance's was clearly not for the same reason as his dad's as he said, "But Elin's gotta meet Amadi!" He looked entirely scandalized and was even starting to climb down so he could go and rectify the situation for himself — though Kate was already sweeping her way down the hall to go find them.

When she did find K and Logan with the kids, she leveled a finger at Logan. "Forge says you guys've gotta meet his little girl."

"I met her," Logan defended. "And K's got a habit of trying to meet 'em after Mom's had some sleep."

K was nodding her agreement as James snuggled into her shoulder. "You know, and we gotta make sure the glitter stays where it's supposed to," she said with a smirk.

"Chance wants Elin to come meet their new friend too," Kate said. "You're lucky I got here first. Kid is on a  _mission_."

"Elin, you can go with Aunt Kate if you want to meet Amadi," K said. "Isn't that right, Aunt Kate?"

"That's right — and your mom can bring James to meet Amadi too," Kate agreed with a sweet smile.

"James is nearly asleep right now," K countered.

"So you're going to let your fear of glitter keep you from meeting the cutest little weather witch in the world?" Kate tsked and shook her head. "Scaredy-cat."

"Did you hold her yet?" K asked.

"I did, actually," Kate said.

"And Jubes?" Logan asked with a little twinkle of amusement.

Kate snorted out a bit of a laugh. "Yeah. And Noh. And Scott with his baby face on full blast. Annie too. I think the glitter has been well sprinkled."

"Well alright then," K said with a smirk. "As long as Jubes got the full dose after Kurt."

"You missed the part where Sying told Jubes that his little sister is going to be even prettier than Amadi. It was priceless." Kate grinned as she swept Elin up into her arms. "And Sying hasn't left the med bay since. Little white-haired girl — he's convinced that's what his little sister's gonna look like."

"And how did Jubes take the whole thing?" K asked with a grin. "I think she was teetering pretty hard already."

"You could blow her over with a feather right now, but Sying won't let her or Noh leave, so she's pretty well-coated," Kate reported with no small amount of glee.

"Good," Logan said. "She needs to lighten up a little bit, and she's as bad about melting over little ones as Scott."

"She's just got a better poker face," K agreed.

"Everyone has a better poker face than Scott," Kate pointed out as she led the way to the med bay. "And to be fair to Jubes, the last go-round was not exactly fun. Six and a half months of blech."

"Yeah, I know. Poor thing needed cuddles. I'm sorry I missed so much of it," K agreed.

"We were miserable together. It was a snuggle fest all around," Kate said. "But this time, if we get her good with the glitter, Noh will be  _around_ , so there's that."

"Yeah, that would be preferable," K said with a nod as they came up on the lab doors.

"Or so help that boy, his lawyer will be on his back so fast even Logan won't have the chance to break him."

"I'll have to get my buggy whip and spurs out," K agreed.

Kate smirked a bit wider as they made their way into the med bay — and their timing couldn't have been more perfect. Sying was standing obstinately in front of Jubes and insisting that she hold Amadi again because he heard Grammy K say babies had glitter and that was how babies were born.

Jubilee let out a sigh as she could  _hear_ Kate snickering, though she glanced over at the newly arrived group and stuck her tongue out as she pulled little Amadi into a quick snuggle and then made her way over to Logan to just tip her into his arms.

"That was the quickest pass off I think I've ever seen," Logan teased her as she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and he headed toward Storm and Forge to take a seat next to her bed.

Chance was grinning as he ran over to grab Elin's hand the second Kate set her down. "Elin, Elin, you gotta meet our new friend. Her name is Amadi, and she is really pretty, and she has white hair, and she is gonna be  _so cool_."

"I know," Elin said. "She  _has_ to be pretty; she's  _Storm's_ baby." She made her way to Forge and put her arms up to be picked up, purposely to snuggle him first.

"That's right, Elin," Forge said with a wide grin as he hugged the little girl in his lap. "You know what's up, don't you?"

"Mmhmm," Elin agreed with a nod before she gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Grammy K," Sying called out as he rushed over to her, pulling on her pants to get her to crouch down to his level so he could whisper, "Grammy K, you gotta have a turn." He grinned impishly. "And then you gotta give Amadi to Mom, because Dad says she's the one who has to do all the work."

"She'll let you know if she decides it's a good idea," K said before she gave him a hug. "And I'll take a turn when Logan's done."

He nodded and let out a sigh. "I wanna sister  _really really_ badly," he admitted. "I'll even take a brother!"

"That sounds desperate," K agreed as she let him lead her over by Logan, sure to give Jubilee a little wink as she went.

"Well…" Sying hedged. "A little brother would get in lots of trouble with me. And it's really hard to not break things, and I don't know if I'm ready to teach about that stuff."

"Well, if you had a sister, she'd probably need all the same lessons," K said. "Little sisters can be big trouble."

"I can handle it," Sying said confidently.

"Are you sure?" K asked as she sat down by Logan. "Sometimes you want to punch them and protect them at the same time."

"You're not supposed to punch people," Sying said with wide eyes. "That's mean when they're not bad guys."

K pulled a face and leaned close to whisper. "I'm mean sometimes," she admitted. "It's true."

"But … Dad says I have lots of gifts that make punching really,  _really_ bad."

"Yes, which is why you really shouldn't," she agreed. "But when I was little, I didn't have anything special, and I was little bitty. Like Elin. So sometimes, people got punched."

"If anybody was mean to Elin, I would punch them," Sying agreed in his quietest whisper.

"Elin can take care of herself," K promised. "Logan and I are making sure of it."

"Like Dad is helping me not break things?" Sying asked, wide-eyed.

"Pretty much," she agreed, as Logan just smirked at the little guy.

"You give her a little kiss, kiddo?" Logan asked as he tipped the little bundle so he could reach her easier.

Sying giggled delightedly and pressed a very gentle kiss to Amadi's forehead and patted her arm gently. "I gonna take care of you too even if you're not  _my_ little sister," he promised.

"There's plenty of little ones for you to help with," Logan said before he looked over at K and, without another word, she reached for the little girl and leaned against him to say hello.

"No surprise that she's gorgeous," K said.

"Very pwetty," Cody agreed from where he was still straining in Annie's arms to keep track of his new favorite friend.

Eventually, though, the kids started to get tired and followed James' lead into dreamland one by one as their parents started to herd them out of the zoo that the med bay had become - though Storm and Forge both had seemed to vastly enjoy all the company.

When the kids all started to yawn, K got up and made the short little walk to Storm to hand her the little girl back. "I'm guessing you haven't gotten to hold her yourself since the guys showed up," she said before she gave her a little kiss on the cheek. "Congratulations, she's already a tiny goddess. You really did make the most beautiful baby. "

"Naturally," Storm said with a little smile as she gently kissed the top of the now sleeping baby's head.

* * *

When the med bay had cleared of all of the visitors and Storm was settling in and marveling at her little girl, a familiar shadow made his presence known at last.

"Had to wait for de crowd to clear," Remy said with a little smile. "But even from the door, she look like she got her mama's beauty."

"She looks more like her father," Storm insisted with a smile as she waved him in. "You're confused by the hair — but she is  _magnificent_."

"I know everyone see what dey wanna see, and to me? She look like a little Stormy," he said, smiling her way as he peeked at the bundle in her arms. "See dat dere?  _Stormy_."

Storm couldn't help but to laugh at him. "You should hold her," she said, and it wasn't a question but a command as she held up the little girl for Remy. "Her name is Amadi," she added as Remy took her in his arms. "It means 'rejoicing.'"

He smiled down at her and traced the curve of the little one's cheek with his finger. "She perfect."

"I expect her to start following you around making trouble in no time," Storm teased. "If you keep up that look."

"I don' know what you talkin' bout, Stormy," he said with a rough voice.

"Of course you don't," Storm said, though she was smirking as she leaned back into the pillows and sedately watched her good friend fall in love with her baby.


	6. Stormtroopers and Siblings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kurt has a serious good news/bad news moment, and Sying is the cutest birthday boy ever.

 

When it was Kurt and Scott's turn for their rotation with the Avengers, Kurt had hardly stepped foot in the tower before he was all but accosted by a nervous-looking Miles.

"Hey, so… so, me and Kamala… we're thinking we want to go out for lunch. There's a diner that's got some really good stuff… and we were thinking maybe we'd take you. Our treat. Just for… just because," he said as he pulled Kurt aside and looked like he couldn't decide if he wanted to spit everything out at once or give up his efforts entirely.

"Far be it from me to say no," Kurt replied with a little smirk.

"Great!" Miles said, probably a little louder than he meant to, before he beamed and ran off to go get Kamala to tell her Kurt was in — while Scott shot Kurt a little raised eyebrow look and a smirk.

It took all of a few minutes for Kamala to come bursting down the stairs and to seize Kurt by the arm as the two young Avengers all but escorted Kurt right back out of the Tower, excitement clear in both of their expressions, though Miles' was more tempered than Kamala's.

It was a gorgeous fall day, so they decided to walk down to the diner, which was only a few blocks from the Tower anyway, and Kamala was in full beaming and babbling mode as she talked to Kurt about all her plans for the latest book in her series and hinted at plans for a whole new set of books once this one was over. Miles, of course, just chimed in every once in a while to prompt her with "don't forget about this part" or "and what about that twist?" that told Kurt he had clearly been reading her drafts as she wrote them.

They settled down into a booth at the diner as both of the young heroes were positively  _beaming_ , and Kamala waited until they had ordered the drinks before she leaned forward with a twinkle in her eye. "So… we didn't exactly bring you all the way here just to talk about books," she said.

"Oh, no?" Kurt asked with one eyebrow raised, though it was clear he'd already caught on to that fact.

Kamala and Miles shared a grin, their posture making it obvious that they were holding hands under the table, though Miles looked like he might decide to pass out as Kamala leaned just that much further forward and whispered, "We're going to be parents."

Kurt's grin was threatening to split his face, and he didn't bother to stand. Instead, he teleported to be beside Kamala and pull her up out of her seat at the booth so he could properly hug her. "That's wonderful news," he said warmly.

"We're not telling everybody yet," Kamala added. "Just… really a few people. My family and Miles' and some close friends. But you were there when we got engaged — and you really should be here for this too, we decided."

"And also Kamala wants to ask Kate how she managed to keep the press from finding out about two pregnancies for as long as she did, because  _that_ is gonna be a problem," Miles said with a little sheepish look. "We're due in June, and Kamala's next blockbuster hits in May…"

"And  _I_ don't mind the attention, but it makes Miles nervous," Kamala finished for him.

"You'll have to ask her soon if that's the case. I'm not sure how you're going to keep it under wraps for long, though. You're still fairly high on the hot list," Kurt said with a grin, though he hadn't yet quit hugging either of them.

"And proud of it," Kamala replied, perfectly content with her Nightcrawler snuggle. When she finally took a step back, she was beaming. "We were gonna wait until next week for our anniversary to tell people, but we just  _couldn't_."

"Yeah, for two people who had secret identities for so long, you'd think we'd be better at keeping secrets," Miles joked.

"I don't know that we're very good references for hiding things from the general public," Kurt said. "And if you ask Logan, he'd just tell you to disappear."

"Which we are so not doing. My mother would have a  _heart attack_ ," Kamala said. She and Miles finally settled back down into the booth with little grins on their faces as the waitress came back with their drinks.

"Oh," the tall blonde said with a little smile. "You're … you're that little author aren't you?" She looked a bit starstruck as she set their drinks down. "I'm  _such a fan_."

Kamala broke into a wide, beaming smile as she nodded happily. "That's me! It's  _so cool_ you recognized me!" she said as Miles looked proud.

The waitress smiled widely and stepped a bit closer before she looked between the three heroes. "And … your friend here has such a lovely accent," she said before she slipped into a perfect German accent of her own. "Incredibly charming." She gave him a little smile and then morphed her face into one more familiar — minus the blue coloring. "I need to have a word with you. I'm sure your little mini hero friends can live without you for five minutes."

Kurt fell into a glare when she said it, and both Miles and Kamala looked alarmed — though Miles tried to go for heroic: "If it takes one second longer than five minutes…"

"I'm sure that's a very big threat, but I'm not here to fight," Mystique said. "I'd just like a word with my son."

Kurt glanced toward Miles and gave him a reassuring nod before he frowned at Mystique, glanced around the diner to see if anyone was watching, and an instant later had teleported them both behind the diner to a more private alley. "What do you want?" he asked, his tail twitching behind him in irritation.

"What did you do with your father?" she said in a rush.

"I don't see how that's any of your concern," he replied with a bit of heat.

"I have to find him," she said, though she didn't sound angry at all. "It's driving me crazy."

He looked a bit surprised at that and frowned her way. "You won't find him," he said simply. "But it doesn't have to drive you crazy. Whatever he did can be reversed, I'm sure."

"I'm not going to trust one of your little friends not to do something to make things worse," she replied with a glare.

"You're not going to find him," Kurt repeated, frowning deeper.

"Why not?" she challenged. "What did you do?"

"I found a way to keep him from bothering any of us again — isn't that in your interests too?" he countered.

"Not when I  _need_ to find him!"

"And I'm telling you: it won't happen," Kurt insisted. He shook his head and tried again: "Let my friends look at the spell and reverse it. I know he's done something to you; we can undo whatever it is, I'm sure."

She all but snarled as she turned on her heel to leave. "I know he's there at your little school somewhere. I  _will_ find out where."

"Not this time," Kurt said, shaking his head, though before he could move to simply teleport her to Strange's sanctum, she had melted back into the crowd, and he let out a little growl of frustration as he headed back into the diner.

"Is everything okay?" Kamala asked as he returned to the table.

He let out a bit of a sigh before he slipped into the seat across from them. "Family drama," he said, waving his hand. "Don't worry about it for now; we have something much better to celebrate."

Kamala and Miles glanced at each other for a moment before they just decided to shake it off, and before long, their food had arrived and they were back into their excited discussion of their brand new adventure together.

* * *

New York was really the perfect place for a woman of Mistral's talents and tendencies. There were so many people here crushing one another in their mad dash for power and glory that it was almost too easy to find clients that fit her tastes.

It had been a few weeks since her last hit, and this latest request for her services seemed to be right up her alley: a sister whose inheritance had been stolen and her father murdered, if the request was to be believed.

But of course, she would need to meet with the woman and do her own research. She was very selective. She did not like being used to enact petty revenge, and anyone who tried found themselves suddenly missing  _their_ valuables instead.

The woman met Mistral at the gate of her lavish home, and her eyes had that slightly sunken look of chronic insomnia, though that was a kind guess as to what was going on. It wouldn't be the first time she'd seen a client driven to drink and other vices after being robbed or cheated, so she reserved judgement for the time being. She knew, after all, that this woman had just come out of a rehabilitation center.

Still, it was hard to stop the raised eyebrow when the first thing that this Susan did was to offer her a glass of wine as they sat in her parlor, and even when Mistral declined, Susan kept the bottle on the table and poured herself a generous glass.

"I've heard you can get anywhere, no matter the security," Susan said after a long drink.

" _Oui_ ," she replied though she watched the woman carefully. Clearly, rehabilitation did nothing for her.

"You sure you don't want any?" Susan asked, misinterpreting her look as she offered a glass. "It's fine wine; my father had an entire winery in, oh, at least three states just for us before my dear little sister had him killed," she added with obvious malice in her voice.

"What is it you're after?" Mistral asked. "I don't have time to waste."

Susan let out a laugh with absolutely no mirth to it. "My sister ruined me; now I want you to ruin her," she said. "Take back my inheritance from her. Everything she's been holding back. I don't care what form it's in — money, jewels, I don't know what she's been doing with it. Just get it  _back_."

Mistral took the woman in for a moment. A hit like that would certainly explain all of the substance abuse issues. And it wasn't like she'd be the first trust fund daughter to get screwed over by a greedy sibling. "Tell me the whole story now," Mistral said as she leaned forward slightly, her chin resting in the palm of her hand.

Susan shook her head and let out a long sigh. "I wish I could," she said, sounding entirely earnest. "The police still don't know what happened to my dad — but they  _do_ know, and my lawyers know, that all his assets were transferred to my sister's name just before it happened." A bit of a glint came into her eyes as she leaned forward. "She got  _everything_. The company, the money — everything."

Mistral looked around the room they were sitting in and the expensive decor. "She left you nothing?"

"Everything is hers. I have to beg for scraps, which she only gives me because she  _knows_ she can't afford a public fight," Susan said, sneering a bit. "I lost everything after that ... my husband, my good name…."

Mistral looked across the table at the file near Susan's right hand. "Is that all you have on her?"

Susan pushed it Mistral's way with a longsuffering sigh. "I can't get anywhere near that mansion of hers. Her  _friends_ won't let me, or I'd have more," she said.

"How long 'as it been since you tried to speak to her in person?" Mistral asked.

"I've been in that god-forsaken center for a couple years now —  _her_ fault — so it's been some time."

"Try, one more time. I will be watching," Mistral said. "And if they treat you as badly as you say, I will take your case."

* * *

Halloween rolled around again, and with it came Sying's birthday — as he happily reminded  _everyone_ all morning, dressed in his Stormtrooper outfit and pretending to shoot at anybody who moved. So of course this meant all sorts of sweets, costumes, and plenty of hugs all around from the excited little half-Kree as he gushed over every single costume.

"You look pretty," he said shyly when Krissy and Kari came out dressed as Elsa and Anna, respectively, and Krissy just beamed.

"Kwissy sing," Kari told Sying with a proud little smile.

Krissy broke into a huge grin and nodded a few times over. "I know  _all_ the words," she reported happily before she started to sing "Let It Go," milking it for all she was worth, belting out the parts she was most confident in — complete with moves from the movie like shaking out her hair as she went.

Kari of course was  _so_ proud of her big sister and even tried to give her a little backup, her high-pitched "let go-o-o-o-" delighting Sying and anyone else nearby to pieces.

And the two little elflings weren't the only ones who had gone with sibling costumes that year. Charlie had wanted to go as Sleeping Beauty that year, so Chance was Prince Philip — and they were both delightedly showing off their costumes to anyone that stood still for more than five seconds at a time.

And Elin and James as Hansel and Gretel were adorable as well. Kurt was practically melting into a puddle over the adorable German outfits, too — which had Kate raising an eyebrow a bit. It didn't help in the least that when they saw him, they both greeted him in German and rushed over for their much needed snuggles.

"You're trying to kill him dead," Kate, dressed in her regal Snow Queen regalia, whispered to the Laura Croft-K.

"It … was the best one I could think of, and Elin loved the idea," K replied with a shrug. "I just told them to say hello in German."

"Look at his  _face_ , though," Kate said, gesturing at Kurt as he snuggled the tiny Hansel and Gretel. "That face gets me in trouble."

"Wait … it gets better," K said just before Elin stepped back far enough to dig into her candy bucket and produce a little gingerbread man to give to him.

Kurt  _beamed_ at Elin and swept her into a deeper snuggle as he kissed the top of her head. " _Danke_ , Elin," he said in a voice that said he was clearly dying of cute.

She giggled and held on tight to him before she gave him a little kiss and a very quiet "Love you. Happy Halloween."

" _Ich liebe dich_ , Gretel," he replied as he ruffled her hair.

About that time, James made his way over to Kate with a gingerbread man for her too. "They're giving them to their favorites," K explained to Kate. "They have some for the elflings and all the kids."

It was impossible for Kate to do anything but melt in the face of a very sweet little boy with a gingerbread man as she swept him up into a snuggle and tickled him before she peppered him with kisses for being too cute, though when she caught Kurt watching her with James with a  _look_  on his face, she had to clear her throat and send James on his way to go play with the others before she raised an eyebrow K's way. "You're going to get me in trouble."

"I lack both the ability and the equipment for that," K teased.

"So the sneaky 'kill Kurt dead' had nothing to do with you being evil," Kate shot back.

"Hey," K said gesturing between the two of them. "You're the evil one this year. I just have big guns."

"No kidding," Kate said, chuckling at the sight of James with his gingerbread man offering the sweet to Kari, who immediately broke off the head to give back to him so they could share — since that was what Krissy always did when Sying brought treats. "He's… he's gonna want a little boy now, and I am  _not_ doing the whole 'keep trying til we get one' thing. That is too much."

"I don't know what to tell you," K said. "Logan was hoping for another girl when we got James."

"That's because Logan wants a small army of little girls so he can take over the world," Kate joked. "They just… he's like the little girl Pied Piper."

"It's because he's paranoid he's going to get another boy like Daken," she replied with a little chuckle. "But I love the imagery."

Kate gestured to the giggling Kari and James with one raised eyebrow. "I think he's safe. Besides, there's an argument to be made for him actually getting to  _raise_ this one."

"You're talking about Mr. Paranoia who is convinced it's him anyhow," K pointed out.

"I suppose he wouldn't listen to  _logic_ pointing out that he didn't even know about his mullet-mohawk-wearing, Noh-harassing kid?"

"Nope," she said, shaking her head. "Tried it. Even drew pictures to illustrate how to pull his head out of his ass, but no."

"He's got it pretty high up there. Why do you think he and the boss man share a brain half the time?" Kate asked with a smirk. "Similar contortionist skills."

"Sounds right. Wanna go see what happens when Chance gets his cookie? I'll bet I can guess."

"It's a  _mystery_ ," Kate said with a sparkle in her eyes.

"Well, she said she wasn't going to give him one until everyone else got one," K said with a laugh.

Kate chuckled. "Oh, so first we'll endure big Bambi eyes from Chance waiting for his treat.  _Then_ snuggles and kisses. Good to know."

"No idea where she gets  _that_ from," she replied as she linked arms with her. "Lead the way, oh, evil one."

Kate had to chuckle as she and K slipped over to where the kids were as James and Elin made the rounds with their sweets. Elin was sure to make sure Sying had his just after Krissy got her sweet, since Krissy was already starting to break up her gingerbread to share — while James had toddled over to Cody so the two little boys could share their sweets too. And just as Kate had predicted, Chance was just… watching and waiting for his gingerbread man from Elin, slightly wide-eyed when his sister got one first... and just a little pouty.

When Elin did finally give him his gingerbread man, though, he sort of looked at it and scuffed his foot against the ground. "Thank you," he said as he placed it carefully in his candy bucket. "That's very nice."

She smiled at him for a second and grabbed his hand before she kissed him quickly. "Happy Halloween."

"Happy Halloween," Chance replied with a shy smile as he seemed to be at a loss for something to give her and just ended up putting his hat on her head before he ran off to half hide behind Charlie.

All of the kids with their gingerbread men were now getting into a good sugared-up state as their parents chatted. All the ladies in the house were in costume, but the guys had plans for a big poker tournament, so not  _everyone_ was dressed up this year — though a few of the guys were still dressed up nonetheless.

Tyler and Tammy were staying with the kids' party, and of course, there really wasn't any question of it being any other way when the birthday boy saw that they had come as Chewbacca and a lady Han Solo. As soon as the two newlyweds came down to join the party, that was it — Sying was attached and refused to go anywhere else for a  _long while_ , breaking into giggles when Jubilee, who had dressed up as Princess Leia for her Star Wars-loving little boy, went flouncing up to Tammy and gave her a kiss.

'You look more stunning than usual, Han," Jubilee giggled.

Tammy drew herself up a bit with a little, "I  _always_ look stunning," directed Jubilee's way as Tyler let out a little pretended territorial growl.

"I'm not takin' your scruffy little nerf-herder," Jubilee half barked at him with a laugh.

"Who's scruffy looking?" Tammy replied without missing a beat, to Sying's delight, before Tyler and Tammy shared a quick kiss over the giggling boy's head.

Sying was clearly in heaven as he watched the three adults play around, though when he took off his little Stormtrooper helmet, Jubilee winked at him. "Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper?" she teased, and he broke into delighted laughter that didn't subside for a little while.

Tammy grinned as she leaned over to whisper in Sying's ear, "Use the Force, Luke," as she tipped her head at one of Annie's Halloween cookies.

Sying raised an eyebrow her way, giggling, and held out his hand in his most dramatic "concentrating" pose, clearly not expecting anything when he was just playing pretend — but then the cookie flew into his hand from Tammy's telekinesis, and it was all the adults could do not to burst into laughter when his eyes widened and he looked at the cookie in  _awe_.

"You are a troublemaker," K said to Tammy as she and Kate made their way over. "Glad to see the actual romance from Star Wars represented, though."

"Luke and Halloween cookies?" Tammy laughed. "The love story of the century, that one."

"Clearly. Soon to be played out as Luke and Elsa once he runs over to split it with her."

"Depends on if she wants to play," Tyler pointed out. "She and Kari are pretty wrapped up with Cody over there." He tipped his head to where both of the elflings were giggling madly as Cody showed off his "tail" for them. Annie had borrowed Kate's Maleficent costume, and Cody was her raven, and he thought his tail feathers were the  _coolest thing ever_ and needed to be shared with his fellow tail-users.

"She's not going to leave Kari alone anyway. Seems to think it's her big sister duty to make sure Anna and Elsa are together," Kate laughed. "She takes it very seriously."

"She's not the only one that's been taking lessons," K said. "Hansel and Gretel are holding hands again."

"I'm pretty sure Chance is pretending to fight his mom for Charlie too. House full of drama queens," Tammy giggled.

"No idea where they picked that up," Kate said with a smirk as Sying wriggled down out of Tyler's arms to go skip over to join the other kids — though it was immensely entertaining to watch Tammy keeping half an eye on him as he would occasionally test out his new 'Force' powers to see if he could lift anything else. Plates, chairs, presents, and various other objects found themselves hovering a few inches above the ground when Tammy was paying enough attention to catch it.

Jess came in a bit later when Gerry, who was fully decked out as the Tenth Doctor. He had a light-up sonic screwdriver and seemed to be delighting in pointing it at his mom, who was a weeping angel, to get her to freeze in her tracks as she made a face at him, which only left him in giggles — though it did mean the entire trek up to join the party after Jess parked took much longer than necessary because of the extended game of red-light-green-light.

In fact, the Bartons had already arrived as well by the time Jess got there, with little Zoe dressed as Donna Noble because Gerry had asked her to, though she didn't really understand why — just that it meant she got to hold her big brother's hand and go running around with him and sometimes play with his sonic screwdriver too.

Natasha was Jessica Rabbit, and she absolutely had the look down pat as she greeted Jess on the way in with a little smirk. "If the men are going to be hermits, I say make them suffer for it," she said that second Jess complimented her on her outfit — and if the looks Clint kept giving Natasha were anything to go by, her evil plan was working marvelously.

But Natasha and Zoe weren't the only ones with Clint that year. When they got to the door, Kate let out a little gasp of delight when she saw that Clint had brought his brother Barney as well as Simone and her kids, and they hadn't even gotten into the entryway before Kate had attacked them with hugs.

"I haven't seen you guys in  _forever_!" Kate gushed as she hugged the now-teenaged boys before she stepped back and had to laugh at their costumes. Simone was Mockingbird, and it was clear that Barney had stolen some  _actual_ Hawkeye costumes from his little brother to dress up the boys as well. "I like the look," she added, and she wasn't sure which was better — the epic eye-roll from Clint or the thumbs-up from Barney.

"Heard there was a party," Barney said with a crooked grin while Clint was pointing Simone and the kids toward where the non-alcoholic portion of the evening was taking place. "And a chance to clean my kid brother out again."

"Yeah, good luck with that," Kate smirked. "Hope you brought plenty of cash to get totally taken by the X-Men."

 _Your brother's a piece of work isn't he?_  K signed out to Clint from behind Barney.  _Want me to stab him?_

Clint rolled his eyes up to the ceiling before he responded in sign:  _You have no idea. Don't stab him in front of the kids._

 _I can make it look like he did it to himself._ She grinned at him for effect.

Clint chuckled a bit at that.  _Tempting._

Barney had looked Clint's way for a moment, and though it wasn't clear how much of the conversation he caught, he broke into a sideways grin and stuck his hand out for K to shake. "Barney Barton," he said as the grin widened. "You know. The better Barton."

"Wow. Your parents really were cruel to you, weren't they? Handle like that? And … not … the better Barton from any reports I've heard," she replied with a smile to match his.

"Well, if you count the gorgeous lady my brother snagged…" Barney allowed. "And hey, when you got a brother named Clinton Francis, you get grateful for 'Bernard'."

"Why do you go by your middle name instead of Charlie?" K asked with a frown.

"Corn pone Iowa parents, circus freak… kid brother never stopped calling me that, take your pick, sweetheart," he said with an easy shrug, though not until after he did a bit of a double take on realizing that she knew his given name.

"Hmm," she said with her head tipped to the side. "Somehow, Clint sounds like he got the better end of that deal."

"Yeah, people keep saying that, but here I am retired with the cutest wife and kids on my own private island…" He grinned and let the sentence hang in the air.

"Yeah. Interesting how you managed that one," K replied. "Can't be luck. Definitely not skill."

Barney laughed and looked over his shoulder at his little brother. "Where'd you get this hype woman?" he asked.

"Dunno — she just attached to me for some reason after we were, oh, publicly tortured by the Kree. Little something you might have seen. If you paid attention. To anything," Clint replied.

"He's my blood brother," K said. "Kinda. In that we spilled a lot of blood together."

"Both ours and otherwise," Clint agreed.

"Didn't know you had the stomach," Barney said, shaking his head.

"I can show you later," K offered with that same bright smile.

Barney raised both hands with another crooked grin. "No thanks," he said. "I don't play those games anymore. Turned over a new leaf and all."

K looked over to Kate. "Logan's wrong. This one's the chicken hawk."

"Please tell him so," Kate said without hesitation.

"C'mon. I haven't used that name in a while. I don't have Clint's bird obsession," Barney laughed easily. "Not even Trickshot anymore. Just retired."

"Iowa corn pone … chicken. Chicken hawk. It fits." She shook her head and gave them a little wave. "I'm going to get a beer. Try not to startle at the scary costumes or hide behind your baby brother while I'm gone."

Clint chuckled at K, and Barney kept right on grinning easily. "Come on, Barn, let's get to the poker game before you dig yourself deeper in the hole you're not even seeing," he said as he steered his big brother toward the poker game taking place down in the lab.

The three of them were just stepping into the elevator to go to the lab when K wrinkled up her nose at him. "You're following me now? That took no time at all. You want to meet the guys, grab a beer, or lose your money?"

"Not really, yes, and I plan on winning," Barney listed off, still with the unerring crooked smile.

"Well good luck with that," she said, though when the elevator stopped, she was sure to thread an arm through each of theirs to lead them to the guys.

The sound of the poker game was in full swing — and there was much laughter and slowly thickening smoke cloud coming from the lab as Clint opened the door and K pulled them both in. "Got a couple of suckers for you, sweetheart," she said as she released both of them and headed over to grab a beer.

"Hundred bucks to buy in," Logan told them.

"Not a problem," Barney said as he was already pulling out a beer. "You need me to spot you, Clint?"

"I'm  _fine_ ," Clint insisted, rolling his eyes.

"You playing too?" Hank asked K. "Because if you are, I'm out."

"Nope. Just needed a beer and a kiss - and to bring you fresh victims," K replied as she rushed over to give Hank a kiss on the cheek and then slide over to park herself on Logan's knee for a moment.

While Barney was settling into his chair with a beer, though, Clint caught Logan's gaze and signed out,  _He cheats. Have fun._

Logan smirked and nodded.  _I do too. Should I clean him out?_

 _Save some for me_. Clint smirked.  _I cheat too_.

 _Can't bluff to me though,_  Logan signed back before he tapped his nose once, though he agreed to give Clint first crack.

Barney, meanwhile, had thrown back the beer and looked around the group almost like he was waiting for something before he let out a sigh and leaned forward. "Barney Barton, since my baby brother here has forgotten his manners."

"How about you don't try for manners lessons in here," Logan replied. "Those tend to get a little bloody and bruised with this group." With a little smirk, he introduced himself using his code name and then continued suit with half the table.

With the pleasantries out of the way, Kurt dealt the first hand, and it wasn't long at all before Clint and Logan were sharing smirks at the increasing frown on Barney's face as he seemed suddenly to realize that his tricks and cheat weren't working when Clint won the first two hands.

"Nice little streak you got goin' there Hawkeye," Logan said around his cigar. "How long you think it'll run?"

"No idea. Guess I'm just lucky tonight," Clint said easily as Barney narrowed his eyes between the two of them.

"Oh, about that," K said as she set the empty beer bottle down. "This one's the  _real_ Chicken Hawk. I have decided."

Logan looked up at K for a moment, then over to Clint, and then he nodded a little. "Okay then. Hawkeye and big Chicken Hawk."

"That's a mouthful," Clint chuckled. "How 'bout, Hawkeye, Chicken Hawk, and Chicken Little."

"No, no," Logan said. "She can keep Squawkeye."

"Not bad," Clint laughed.

"Fits you better, Clint," Barney said. "Kate's got the Hawkeye title better handled."

K tutted. " _Förrädare_." She gave Logan a quick kiss before she made sure to tell him her thoughts low enough just for him to hear. "Destroy him." She gave Clint a little smirk and hopped up to head back upstairs. "Have fun boys. I'll be back for beer and to play the winner later."

"Don't get into too much trouble," Kurt teased her way as she left.


	7. Not All Family Reunions Are Good Ones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which siblings are the absolute worst sometimes.

 

Upstairs, the party was steadily growing. Storm had joined them with Amadi after the little girl finally woke up from her nap — both of them dressed as witches to the adoration of all — and America came bouncing in the door a little later dressed in a sexy nurse costume to Lucy's white lab coated doctor.

But when Billy and Teddy showed up with wide grins, they had half the adults laughing as they burst in and, in perfect unison, called out, "excell-ent!" — they were fully decked out as, well, Bill and Ted.

"You two are just adorable," Annie said as she shook her head at the pair of them. "You always have the cutest couples costumes."

"I just can't believe we didn't think of this one sooner," Teddy said with a grin as he wrapped her in a hug. "Love the Maleficent, by the way. Your raven is my favorite touch."

"He's a sweet little raven for sure," she agreed with a laugh. "You want to hold him?"

"Yes! Of course," Teddy said with a wide smile. "Gotta get some practice in."

When she handed Cody over to him, the little guy just looked up at him with wide eyes and a crooked smile for the longest time before he crunched up and buried his face in Teddy's shoulder with a giggle.

"He's been learning from James, I'm afraid," Annie said as a half-apology, half-explanation.

"Not surprised," Teddy said with a grin. "Seems like I never see those two apart, except when Kari's messing with James or Zoe is roping them all into mischief.

"That's the cutest thing I've seen all day," Billy called out as he joined the two of them. "Look at him, Annie — isn't that the cutest thing you've seen?"

"He really is darling with a baby in his arms," she agreed.

Billy leaned over with a twinkle in his eye. "Well, give us another few months and you'll get to see that look more often," he told her in a conspiratorial whisper.

Annie's eyes widened. "Really?"

Billy grinned. "Oh yeah. Got the call from the agency that they matched us with a mom. She's only a few months in, but she likes our profile… Gonna have a cute little boy of our own soon!"

Annie broke into a wide grin and flung her arms around Billy's neck before she made sure to do the same for Teddy too — while Cody relished the chance to be part of even more snuggles.

* * *

When K returned from the poker game, she made her way over to Kate and Storm with her arms crossed. "I think — outside of those that are in some way married into or related to a Summers — we should ban siblings from visiting unless they are tiny. Estranged adult siblings? Just say no."

"Barney being a pain?" Kate asked in a tone that said she was not at all surprised.

"I just don't like him," she said. "He's being nice, but he's doing the older sibling thing that makes me want to just … stab him in the mouth."

"Oh, so that thing older siblings always do forever," Kate said. "Susan does it too. Must be a curse of us younger siblings."

"Not all of us," she said through gritted teeth.

Kate patted K's shoulder. "Well at least Clint's has an adorable wife and kids that are fun. Come meet Simone and hang out. You'll like her  _much more_ than that ridiculous Barton boy."

"So many promises," K replied. "At least I had a couple beers and set off the time bomb."

"He … he can be nice when he wants to be," Kate said lamely. "It's just rare."

"I'm sure. Just not to Clint. He thinks he's being funny."

Kate rubbed the back of her neck. "Better'n I was when Clint was getting his butt handed to him by the tracksuits. So I have to give him that."

"Siblings are supposed to back you up first and pick on you later, not start out pissing you off. At least open with a hello that sounds like you halfway like them before diving into the sarcasm and picking. Come on."

"Yeah, well, you're the one who set off the time bomb. Give it an hour tops."

"I did," she said with a little smirk. "Clint seemed happy to see it too."

"Those two… are idiots," Kate said, shaking her head.

They were just starting to joke around a bit more freely when Tony and Pepper arrived — their slick entrance blown when Elin and James made their way over to give the two of them a gingerbread man each. Pepper was dressed as Captain America and enjoying the look Tony was giving her. Every time he took a moment to glance her way, he just had to shake his head and chuckle, but even that was blown when James pulled at her pants leg, held up his gingerbread man, and smiled widely.

Pepper matched his wide smile and scooped up the little guy to give him a big kiss on the cheek. "Is that for me?" she asked him when she was done.

"Mmmhmm," he said, nodding seriously with one eyebrow quirked up.

Pepper grinned even wider. "I don't have to share it with Tony, do I?" she asked in a teasing whisper.

"Nooooo," he said, scrunching up his nose as Elin shook her head at her little brother and held up the cookie for Tony.

"You should try to share with her anyhow," she advised Tony.

Tony couched down to her level with a sparkle in his eyes. "I don't know; I think I should share with the very pretty Gretel who gave me the cookie," he said. "Pep's got her own sugar daddy now."

Elin giggled at him and held her arms up. "Okay," she said.

He grinned and swept her up, tossing her in the air as he did so, before he very dramatically bit off the gingerbread man's head, complete with monster noises.

She giggled harder and followed suit, though she could actually pull off the growl the right way, even if it didn't sound very monster-like with the giggles.

"You're much scarier than me," Tony told her as he set her back down. "Too scary. I think I'm gonna have to hide," he added, glancing Pepper's way with a little smirk.

Elin grinned at him and nodded. "All the other boys are hiding in the lab," she said.

"Are they scared of you too?" he teased.

She shook her head, the long curls bouncing behind her as she laughed at them. "No … they're being party poopers."

"Shame on them," Tony said with a smirk. "Think I should send a few up here so you can scare them with your monster noises?"

She thought about it for a second then very slowly shook her head. "No. I can scare enough here," she said before she leaned toward him with big eyes to whisper, "but Gretel isn't supposed to be scary."

He leaned toward her and matched her wide-eyed expression. "She's pretty scary to the witch who tried to eat her little brother," he said with a significant look Pepper's way, and it took her a second to take the cue before she started to pretend to 'eat' James, blowing raspberries on his tummy as she did so.

James, of course, just leaned backward, giggling out 'stop' and then 'more' when Pepper would actually stop. It wasn't more than a couple of times, though, before she pulled him into a snuggle and he half-melted into her shoulder.

"It's probably a good thing Cap isn't a witch then," Elin said with a little smile before she waved at Tony and skipped off toward the other kids her age, leaving James to get his snuggles.

Of course, Tony didn't  _quite_ make it past the rest of the kids, because his biggest little half-Kree fan was fast enough to speed over to where he was and wrap his leg in a hug. "Tony!  _Guess what_! I am a  _JEDI!_ " he declared between happy, excited bounces.

"Oh, you're going to have to show me that before I go downstairs and clean out the poker game," Tony said as he bent down to pick him up.

Sying was beaming as he nodded and then scrunched up his face in concentration as he pointed at a plate of Annie's cookies - and sure enough, they came flying over to where the two boys were so that Sying could snatch one up and bite into it with a little cackle of delight.

Tony looked around the room until he spotted Tammy and just shook his head at her. "Something tells me that's only going to work today," Tony said with a little smirk.

"Cuz it's my  _birthday_ ," Sying informed him, nodding seriously. "And I'm short for a Stormtrooper," he added with a grin that looked very much like Jubilee. "You should dress up. Dad's friends Billy and Teddy dressed up and  _they_ are playing downstairs now!"

"I couldn't figure out who to dress up as," Tony told him, looking as serious as he could. "So instead, I just came as myself."

Sying scrunched up his face for a moment and looked thoughtful. "You … you can be… you can be a starpilot," he decided at last. "Cuz you make spaceships."

"Alright then," Tony said with a nod. "That's what I am."

"But you're a  _rebel_ ," Sying said, putting a finger to his lips. "So it's a secret. Shhhh."

"You got it buddy," he said as he set him down. "Happy Birthday. Have fun. I'm just going to go see what all the guys are doing."

"Grammy K put a bomb there," Sying told him conspiratorially. "I heard her tell Hawkeye."

"That does not surprise me one bit," Tony said with a little laugh.

"So be careful!" Sying told him, leveling an index finger at him before he grinned and ran off to go play with the other kids some more, helping James snuggle Pepper for a moment because he hadn't said hi to her yet.

* * *

The rest of the junior team was trickling in, and while everyone was finally settling in to the little games that Annie and Jubilee had planned out for the kids, Wade and his …  _date_ … made their dramatic and very late entrance.

K was with Natasha and Storm, trying to referee the kids, when Wade sidled up to Kate with a little blonde. "Whatcha think, Katie-bug? Jack Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe. Eh?" He gestured to himself, and it didn't take Kate long at all to catch that the blonde looked exactly like K — though a touch more fair-skinned.

She tried to cover for her surprise but couldn't quite stop the double take K's way before she said, "I don't think I've met Ms. Monroe yet."

"Sure you have; she goes by Storm ... oh," Wade laughed a little too hard at his own joke, shaking his head and wiping away a false tear before he caught his breath and cleared his throat. "Katie-bug, this … is Lisbet."

The blonde extended her arm and gave Kate a bit of a shy smile. "Hello. Nice to meet his friends finally."

"I didn't know he was dating anyone or I'd have pressured him to bring you by sooner," Kate said as she recovered herself a bit more. She tipped her head and took in a breath. "So, I'm Kate, as you can tell, and… you gotta be related to K somehow. Cousin? Aunt?"

"She's my little sister," Lisbet replied with a tight smile. "And she's been avoiding me forever."

"Ah, well…" Kate looked a bit sheepish. "I'm so not the one to ask about that. Haven't seen my own sister in years."

"I'd have to say she's beat you out for evasion," Lisbet replied slowly.

Kate cleared her throat. "So ... how long have you been dating my favorite mercenary?" she asked conversationally.

"We met at  _New Years,_ " Wade said excitedly. "At least ... face to face. I was talking to her before then on the phone. Email. Skype. All that."

Kate leaned toward Lisbet. "He means well," she said.

"I know," she said with a little smile in response. "He's got a good heart. He just can't control himself too well."

"Yeah, I know." Kate tilted her head. "How'd you meet, then? He seek you out?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact," she said with a nod. "He said you guys found my name in some old files of hers?"

"Umm." Kate looked toward Wade. "I guess? We weren't really looking for… That was with the whole… I mean, you saw JJ's whole spiel on TV a few years back, right?"

"I did," she said, nodding slowly. "And to be honest, I thought she was probably dead until that all started up, and you wouldn't believe the trouble I had when they started looking for her."

Kate winced in sympathy. "Ooh, remind me to introduce you to Tyler. He can totally relate to that."

"I managed," she said. "I don't like hiding out in the middle of nowhere, but that was my only option, really."

"Sorry to hear it," Kate said. "I didn't know there was someone out there who… well, I mean, we fixed it, but sorry about all the crap in the interim."

"Yeah, well. When most people's little sisters make a mess, it doesn't turn into a global catastrophe like Lilja does, apparently."

"Well, my big sister teamed up with the same guys who put a price on my head, so at least K's wasn't her own fault," Kate said with a shrug.

"If you say so," Lisbet said with a little shrug of her own.

Kate gave her a bit of a sideways glance. "It wasn't," she said flatly.

Lisbet looked her up and down and had the sense to at least look like she understood that she'd hit a nerve. "Alright."

Kate returned the once-over for a moment before she turned her shoulder a bit so she was better facing Wade and Eleanor. "Your Ms. America costume is amazing," she told Eleanor. "You should totally show America."

"Will you take me to find her?" Eleanor asked, catching on that there was an issue with Lisbet.

Kate grinned and took Eleanor by the hand to go find America and Lucy and inflict the adorable on the two of them, though of course Kate made it a point to pass by K and mutter "sisters suck" on her way past.

"What?" K asked, spinning on the spot to Kate before she looked the other way to see Wade conversing with Annie, Jess and … "Oh, crap." Now, it was a simple matter of what to do about her sister. She couldn't ditch and leave the kids behind. And considering how much fun they were having … nope.

"I suppose someone would care if I killed her, right?" K said to Natasha with a little tight, strained look. "It's not like Wade has too many dating opportunities."

"Well, killing is so  _final_ ," Natasha said with a raised eyebrow.

"She wouldn't  _really_ die," K said, rolling her head Natasha's way. "But it would wreck her dress."

"Then the healing is a family trait," Natasha surmised before she looked over at Wade and Lisbet. "You don't have to talk to her. I'll cover it."

"You're my favorite Avenger," K said, perfectly straight faced in an emotionless tone.

"Of  _course_ I am," Natasha replied without even blinking. "No competition, really."

"Well. You're my favorite  _girl_ Avenger. I got a thing for the little stabby one."

Natasha waved her hand. "I'm your favorite Avenger. Logan doesn't count in this equation when you're married to him," she said matter-of-factly.

"Oh, well, in that case, the title is yours." K just gave her a little smirk as the little ones started their attempts to bob for apples.

Krissy was cheating and using her tail when she stuck her face in to pull the apples closer, though when Sying pointed it out, she very quickly told him that he was just a sore loser. Elin and Chance cheated in entirely a different manner — trying to go at the same time so they could help each other corral their apples, giggling madly when they weren't half submerged.

"You gotta use re-courses," Zoe explained to Sying patiently when he tried to point out the cheating. "Mom says that  _all_ the time."

Still, the cheating little ones didn't get too far before Chance laughed and just picked his apple up. Elin gave him another kiss, and the two of them took their snitched apples over to Tammy and Tyler to turn them into caramel-covered apples.

Charlie had worked hard to get her apple without cheating, but when it was Gerry's turn, she broke into sudden and inexplicable giggles until he was halfway bent over and she just rushed over and dunked his head all the way under. When he came back up, he was wide-eyed for all of a second before he saw Charlie giggling madly, and then Jess had to pull him back because he tried to just straight up pick her up — super strength from his mom and all —and throw her in, all while she giggled and he told her, "Turnspouts, turnspouts" and Zoe was clearly encouraging him with her best cheers.

Krissy shook her head and her finger at Charlie with the hand that didn't have her caramel apple. "No dunking. That's mean."

"I don't mind," Gerry assured her. "It's silly."

"Because you li-i-ike her," Krissy sang out.

Gerry wrinkled his nose at her. "I li-i-i-i-i-ike silly," he said with his hands on his hips.

"But you wanna kiss  _that_ silly," Krissy giggled.

Gerry grinned at Krissy and ruffled her hair. "You're so little," he told her with a very big brotherly look before he headed off to go try again to bob for his apple, though Krissy was giggling madly when she noticed that he waited until he could see Charlie before he did so.

Meanwhile, Sying, with his caramel apple in hand, had slipped over to where Wade and Lisbet were so he could grin up at Lisbet. "It's my birthday," he told her importantly.

She turned his way with a surprised look on her face before she crouched down. "Well, happy birthday, handsome," Lisbet replied with a little smile. "How old are you today?"

"Three," he said happily, holding up the correct number of fingers.

She looked a little bit surprised at that. "You … are very tall and very smart for just being three," she said. "Are you sure it's three?"

He nodded and counted off one-two-three. "And next year I will be four, and maybe I will go to school. Dad thinks these schools are  _slow_."

"For a boy as smart as you, he might just be right," she replied.

He beamed at her and took a big bite of caramel apple before he continued. "You look like Grammy K but with different hair. Are you being her for your costume?"

Lisbet didn't quite know how to respond to that, but she gave it her best try. "No, I'm an old movie star for my costume. Did you say  _Grammy_? Where are your mom and dad?"

He giggled and nodded. "Dad is playing hide and drink things with allll the boys," he explained. "Mommy is  _Princess Leia._ "

Lisbet looked up at Princess Leia and shook her head. No way. She could hardly believe that it had been long enough since she'd seen her sister that there were  _two_ generations of little ones she didn't know about. "Is your daddy going to come up here so I can meet him?" she asked, then whispered, " _Your Granny is my little sister._ "

He went totally wide-eyed at that. " _Really?_ " he asked, all excitement and bounces.

"Really," she said, nodding a little bit. "But I've never met your mom and dad."

"No worries," he said, holding his hand up to indicate that she should stay put. "My dad  _loves_ people. I get him." With that, he skipped off, surprising Lisbet a bit more when he skirted around the adults who might have noticed him sneaking off to the men's party by climbing up to the ceiling and scooting along from there.

When he got down to the lab, he happily climbed into his dad's lap while they were all still playing cards as the men in the room looked bewildered by the sudden appearance of a tiny Stormtrooper. "Dad, did you know Grammy K has a  _sister_?" he asked without any introduction or fanfare. "She is a movie star!"

Logan slowly turned his head Sying's way but didn't say a word as he tried to figure out what exactly was going on. Noh, meanwhile, picked up his little boy a bit better and tipped his head at Sying. "Does she have a sister with her costumes?" he asked, since clearly that was the reasonable explanation.

"No!" Sying giggled. "Her costume is a  _movie star_. Being a sister's not a  _costume_ ," he said as if this was obvious.

Billy glanced up from his phone a second later. "Kate says her name's Lisbet."

Logan narrowed his eyes and tossed his cards down. "I fold," he said before he got up and started heading for the door.

"Dad, Dad, we gotta go too. You gotta meet Sister-Grammy K!" Sying insisted as he pushed Noh's cards down on the table with one hand — and since they were face-up, Noh folded anyway.

He scooped Sying up with a sigh and set him on his shoulders. "Alright. Let's go meet this person," he said.

"We'll deal you out for a few hands," Clint called out, knocking his boot against Barney's sleeping form — his brother was already passed out, his head tipped back in the chair next to him as he'd started drinking even more heavily than before when he realized that he was losing. "Getting short on players lately."

Noh chuckled at that before he headed up, and Sying wriggled to be let down so he could skip over to Lisbet and Wade — and Logan.

"Where'd you find her, Wade?" Logan asked, though he was more or less blocking their view of where K was with Natasha still.

"Tucked away in Miami," Wade said with a grin.

"And you were thinking — what? Happy family reunion that clearly neither of them were looking into?" he asked.

"Little bit? But also ... I was thinking nice stabby lady friend who didn't run away screaming from my face?" Wade shrugged openly.

"Well, I've had enough of this," Lisbet said, stepping quickly around both of them. "I've waited too long already, and I'm not going to stand around waiting for her to say hello even after I came  _this far_ to see her." Before she could take more than a step or two, Logan grabbed a hold of her arm and stopped all of her forward motion.

"Hold on a sec, lady," he said, keeping his tone low so that only someone with enhanced hearing could catch it. "If I find out you used Wade here just to get to  _my wife_ , you're gonna wish you didn't heal."

Lisbet goggled at him openly for a moment, her mouth opening and closing not unlike a fish before she let out a low sound from the back of her throat. "What … you've got to be kidding me," she said, her tone almost to a hiss. "You think I'd  _get involved_ with a man just to see her?"

Logan leaned closer to her for just a moment. "All the same? You better be here for the right reasons. I don't take too kindly to anyone screwin' with my friends."

As Lisbet looked insulted further, Wade couldn't have been happier and as soon as Logan let Lisbet's arm go, Wade nearly wrapped himself around Logan in a hug. "I knew you cared!" he mock-whispered even as Logan rolled his eyes and shoved him off.

Lisbet was taking the most direct route as the two men shared a look and both headed over — Wade taking the path of least resistance behind Lisbet and Logan darting off to cut around to K before they could get there.

"There a reason you're still avoiding her?" Logan asked as he stepped up next to K.

K took a second to look between him and the quickly-approaching, irritated sister. "I don't like her. At all. And she has shit taste in men."

"Then it's a good thing he has the same taste in women," Natasha said under her breath on the other side of K.

"It's nice to be introduced to your family secondhand," Lisbet said airily as she glared at K. "Your grandson's adorable, by the way."

"He really is," K replied quickly. "You're lucky you got in here. Usually, his father's security system weeds out the aggressive visitors."

"Wasn't feeling too aggressive when I  _first_ walked in the door," Lisbet pointed out. "Wade painted it like it would be a nice party — family and friends, that sort of thing. Didn't realize I'd be getting the cold shoulder all night just for existing."

"I … had no idea you were screwing around with Wade, or I'd have given it to you earlier," K said with her chin tipped up. "Though maybe if I had a little warning you were coming, I could have prepared."

"Why do you think I didn't call ahead?" Lisbet shook her head. "Apparently, the only way to see my sister is to just show up — forget playing nice."

"You're both doing a shit job of that," Logan said. "So what is it that's got you two still sniping after... what … seventy years or so?"

"Oh, I don't know. We could start with my thinking she was  _dead_  until a couple years ago when she was on national TV?" Lisbet said with a bit of heat. "The whole grieving process upended on itself? Family torn apart and I find out on  _television_ she wasn't even gone?"

"I'd ask if you tried to find her, but…." Logan put his arm around K's back gently. "Not like you could have."

"Of course not. She was always the sneakier one. And then I stop by to find out how she's been, and look at what I missed." Lisbet gestured at the ongoing party. "Nieces, nephews, grand-nieces and nephews — how long have you had this adorable family and I didn't know about it to spoil the kids?"

The descriptor took K off-guard by a fair bit, and she went for straight honesty instead of the pure snark she'd been dealing out. "Not that long, really. We've only been married for three years. You didn't miss that much."

"Three years, two kids from this marriage. What about Princess Leia over there and the little white-haired kid?"

"Mine by adoption," Logan said. "More or less."

Lisbet relaxed the slightest bit on hearing that at least it hadn't been a few decades of missing out on family, though she still looked annoyed. "If I'd  _known_ , I'd have asked you to my last wedding. You'd have liked him; he was a good soldier."

"Still stuck on soldiers, huh?" K asked. "Not terribly surprised."

"Like you're that much different. An Avenger and an X-Man? Come on."

"He's more durable than most soldiers," K teased as she elbowed Logan in the ribs a little.

"Which is  _perfect_ for you," Lisbet agreed. "I'd have liked to see you get settled down with someone like that. What happened — forget you had a sister to have at the wedding party?"

K took a deep breath and crossed her arms over her chest. "You couldn't have gone anyhow. We were kind of … it was a rough time. Security wise."

"So send me an announcement at least!"

"I thought you were dead, honestly, you old battle axe," she said with a little shrug. "How would I have known otherwise?"

Lisbet shook her head and glared for a moment before she pinched the bridge of her nose. "You and I both know it'd take a lot more than a few years' age gap to kill me."

"Yeah, but you've never been a fighter either. If you dealt with half the crap I've messed with … well." For the first time, K gave her a little bit of a crooked smirk and raised one eyebrow a little bit.

"Yeah, I gathered that from the book," Lisbet said. "I'm really sorry all that happened to you."

Both of the little ferals drooped a bit on hearing that, and Logan swore under his breath. "Frikkin'  _book_."

"What, you think I was honestly going to pass up a chance to find out what happened to my baby sister?" Lisbet raised an eyebrow at him. "And get pissed on her behalf? She's … her. But she's still my baby sister."

"I'm not the baby. Stop that," K half growled.

"You are  _now_ ," Lisbet said, though without any heat.

"Doesn't change the fact that you're wrong."

Lisbet rolled her eyes. "So, are you going to introduce me to the kids? I've already met the adorable Jedi grandson."

"Well, here I figured you knew everything," K said under her breath before she turned to Natasha and nodded so she could gather up the little ones. "What about you? Is it just you, or are there, like … forty kids wandering around with your hairline?"

Lisbet let out a sigh. "Just me," she said, sounding a bit resigned to it.

"That … sorry to hear that," K replied with a little sigh as the two little gingerbread dealers showed up. James had already attached himself to K's leg and was staring up at the stranger with a frown on his face, and Elin stood between her parents with a look of distrust on her face that was a little too familiar for Lisbet.

"James and Elin," K said. "This is your Aunt Lizzie."

Lisbet crouched down with a look on her face that was far warmer than  _anything_ she'd given K. "Are you having a good Halloween?" she asked sweetly.

James side-stepped around K's leg to hide a bit better as Elin nodded her head and held on to her father's hand.

"Well, it's very nice to meet you both. You look amazing in your costumes," Lisbet said.

" _Tack så mycket,_ " Elin said very clearly as James quietly muttered out the much shorter ' _tack'_.

"Oh, your Svenska is very good," Lisbet said with a delighted laugh.

Elin gave her a shy smile and tried to hide behind Logan's hand.

"You actually getting serious with Wade?" Logan asked, drawing her attention back.

"We've been dating long enough," Lisbet said with a little smile. "And… it  _is_ nice to have someone I won't outlive this time. So, yes, I think so."

Logan raised an eyebrow and looked up at Wade. "Well it's about damn time. Don't screw this one up. She might just stab you."

Wade put a hand on his heart and grinned. "I would  _never_."

"I'm not worried," Lisbet said with a small smile. "He's a good guy."

"He is," Logan agreed. "But most people can't get past the rest of his personality."

"Well, as Lilja likes to point out, I  _am_ older. I'd like to think I got patient with age."

"You sure got blonder," K said airily as she looked out to where the kids were roughhousing.

Lisbet followed her gaze for a moment and sighed as she took Wade's hand. "Sure."

"I don't suppose anyone's shown you around the general access part of the tour?" K asked as she excused the little ones in Swedish to let them play more with their friends.

"Not yet, no." Lisbet gave her sister a little smile. "I'd really like to see it, though."

K turned to Natasha for a moment. "Can you watch over Hansel and Gretel for a little bit, Mama Spider? I think I'll keep my sweetheart with me for this one."

"I'll try not to fatten them up too much."

"You'll play hell getting them to eat much more sugar anyhow," Logan said. "Saw her turn down Chance's cookie when I got up here."

"And you know she's done when she says no to  _Chance_." Natasha shook her head with a little smirk.

"It's a  _phase_ ," he replied, pointing a finger at her.

Natasha smiled sweetly. "You know that's what people said every time Clint and I got back together."

"Yeah? Maybe it still is," he countered before he gave her a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Don't stab anyone until after the kids are asleep," she whispered his way.

"I'm not makin' any promises," Logan called out as he and K led Wade and Lisbet out — away from the party.

* * *

While the not-quite-so-happy family reunion was going on in the corner of the party, Gerry and Chance were playing together and blissfully unaware of any drama. Gerry had let his best friend borrow his screwdriver, and Chance loved the noise it made every time he pressed the button as he went around "zapping" everything.

"My mom can zap things without screwdrivers," Gerry said proudly as the two boys played heroes together. "She says since I got her sticking to walls and strength and stuff maybe as I get bigger I'll get that too."

"My dad can zap things with his eyes," Chance responded without missing a beat.

"Yeah, I know," Gerry giggled.

"Your dad zaps things with arrows like Kate," Chance added as he pretended to shoot the sonic screwdriver like a bow.

"That's why they have the same name," Gerry agreed as he climbed onto the back of a chair to dramatically fall "victim" to one of Chance's shots. He hung upside down on the chair with his head over the edge for a while, grinning crookedly, before he asked suddenly, "How come you like Elin?"

"Cuz I do," Chance said with a shrug.

"Yeah, but how come?"

"I dunno." Chance shrugged again. "Cuz I  _do_."

Gerry wrinkled his nose at his best friend for a moment and then just shook his head. "O- _kay_. You're weird."

"Nu-uh," Chance said, shaking his head.

But Gerry just giggled and climbed back up onto the seat before he declared, "I'm a Cyberman! DELETE!" and started to chase Chance around the living room, screaming "delete" at him the whole time as Chance pulled out some of his best action hero moves in trying to take down his new foe.

Annie, meanwhile, had been caught up in games of pretend as well. Since Krissy, Kari, and Charlie were all princesses, Charlie had decided that Annie had to try to "capture" all of them. Cody was doing his level best to help, too, chasing after Kari and flapping his wings as Annie caught Krissy and tickled her mercilessly now that she had her "prisoner."

Of course, Kari solved her little raven problem by climbing up the wall to get away from Cody, but that had the little boy incredibly upset as he stared up at the ceiling with wide eyes. "No fair, no fair!" he called out at Kari as the pink elfling giggled impishly and stuck her tongue out.

James had been playing with Zoe as they traded candies that they didn't like for ones that they did when they heard Cody start to get upset, and Zoe frowned for a second before she looked over at James with a little smirk. "Watch," she instructed James with a wink before she skipped over to where Cody was. Once she got there, she grabbed Cody's hand and gave him a little squeeze before she squared her shoulders and looked up at Kari and very clearly called out, "Chicken Hawk!"

Kari gasped dramatically as if this was the worst possible insult as she looked over at Zoe. "Nu- _uh_ ," she said insistently, but Zoe just gave her a smug grin.

"Uh-huh," Zoe countered, one hand on her hip and the other holding Cody's. "Chicken Hawk on the ceiling!"

" _Nein_."

" _Da_." Zoe looked even more smug the more upset Kari looked. "Chicken Hawk, Chicken Hawk, Chicken Hawk," she sang out over and over again as James dissolved into little giggles.

"Am not!"

"Chicken Hawk, Chicken Hawk!" Zoe continued to sing as Cody scrubbed at his face to wipe his tears and looked at her in something like awe.

Kari pouted and crossed her arms over her chest, her tail switching angrily behind her, but she did start to climb down from the ceiling all the same — all while Kate, who had come over to help her fellow evil queen "capture" the princesses, just watched the whole display in something like shock.

"I blame Logan," Kate whispered to Annie, who couldn't help but laugh at the whole situation.

"Of course you do," she said, still laughing.

Of course, once Kari was down from the ceiling, it was a much fairer fight all around, as Annie and Kate had their little raven to help — and Kate had a small army of little bamf snowmen who seemed to be playing both sides, helping Kate capture anyone who wasn't an elfling but teleporting Kari and Krissy out of "danger" at the same time. But James and Zoe had also joined in on the side of the good guys — and it didn't take long for the rest of the kids to join in, too, with Chance and Gerry joining in from their own games.

Of course, once Cody found himself as the only kid on the "bad guy" side, he stopped in the middle of chasing Sying and frowned. "Inna be good," he whined.

Chance thought about it for a second before he rushed over to Elin. "Can I borrow my hat again?" he asked, and when Elin nodded, he beamed at her, took his hat back, and ran back to where his little brother was so he could put his Prince Philip hat on Cody's head. "There. Now you are a prince too!"

Cody  _beamed_ up at his brother and let out a delighted little giggle before he darted in and hugged Chance — and hurriedly joined in the fighting against the two evil queens.

It didn't take long before Annie and Kate were "vanquished" — though it was definitely the dramatic fake bamf deaths and their pretended mourning over their dead queen Kate that had the kids in hysterics of giggles and laughter.

Finally, though, the kids started to slow down, and the first sign that it was time to start putting everyone to bed was when Krissy and Sying started up with their usual arguing.

The kids were playing more pretend, this time playing superheroes — being X-Men or Avengers or whoever they wanted to be as they "fought" the bamfs by tackling them — and the fight started when Sying had valiantly chased after a bamf who was chasing Krissy across the ceiling, since he was one of the few who could get up there too.

Of course, as soon as Krissy noticed what he was doing, she spun on her heel to face him with her hands on her hips. "I don't  _need_ your help!"

"We're working together," Sying tried to explain diplomatically.

"I don't need it."

"Everybody need help," Sying shot back.

"I don't  _need_ it."

Kate and Annie glanced at each other before Kate let out a sigh and looked at one of the bamfs, who nodded and teleported over to grab Krissy and pulled her down off the ceiling, since Kate couldn't reach up there. Kate picked up her little purple elfling with a long sigh. "Honey, you have to play nice. When you work together, you help each other. You would help Sying too, wouldn't you?"

"That different."

"It's really not," Kate said patiently. She smiled up at Sying, who had his usual kicked puppy look when he got in a fight with Krissy, and she tipped her head to indicate the hurt little boy. "You hurt Sying's feelings, Krissy."

Krissy looked up at Sying for a moment, her tail switching behind her at just the tip before she let out a long and discontented sigh. " _Sorry_ ," she muttered out, sounding like she had been forced to apologize when Kate hadn't even asked her to yet.

"We keep playing?" Sying offered with both eyebrows raised.

"No, honey, it's time to go to bed," Jubilee said as she joined the other two ladies with the unruly "heroes."

Sying stuck his lower lip out a bit at that answer, and he crossed his arms over his chest for a moment and grumped. "Don't wanna."

But before Jubilee could even ask, the bamfs had teleported Sying down from off the ceiling as well — right into her arms. She pressed a little kiss to Sying's forehead as soon as she had hold of him, and though he squirmed a bit, it wasn't long at all before he and all the other kids were all headed in different directions, being shepherded by bamfs and parents alike — until everyone under the age of ten was well and truly either tucked into bed or on their way home. And the rest of the partygoers were either taking their kids home or making their way down to the lab to retrieve the drunken boys from their poker game.

Natasha wasn't surprised in the least to find that Clint was startlingly more sober than he would have been usually, as he was keeping half an eye on Barney — though he needn't have bothered, as Barney was pretty well zonked out, and Simone came to retrieve him after saying her goodbyes to Kate.

"You cleaned him out, didn't you?" Natasha asked Clint with a little smirk as she watched Barney and Simone head off.

"He needed a good cleaning," Clint defended. "And besides, I checked with Simone to make sure they had plenty to get back home."

"Of course you did," Natasha said with a fond smile as she kissed his cheek and hooked arms with him to pull him to his feet and bring him back upstairs to where Zoe was waiting for them, completely curled up asleep on the loveseat with a blanket Cody had given her that she had a death grip on.

"We'll bring it back in the morning if it's an issue," Clint decided when they realized they couldn't get to the blanket without waking Zoe — and with that, the little Romanoff family packed up and headed out.

The story was about the same for pretty much everyone else as, once the kids were out, the ladies headed down to grab the stragglers from the poker game — the ones that hadn't been retrieved by their designated costumed drivers while the kids were being wrestled into sleeping.

Annie and Kate, of course, shared little grins at the state of their boys — both of them wearing wide grins and very much snuggly now that they'd been liquored up. Annie was half giggling as Scott was leaning on her heavily, though Logan didn't miss the little look she shot him over Scott's shoulder with a mouthed out 'thank you' — clearly pleased to see her husband had such a good time and got to relax with his friends for a few hours.

As for Noh, Jubilee wasn't sure if she was disappointed or not that her little be-bopper wasn't having one of his "gravity-defying" moments that usually came with his drinking, though that probably had something to do with the fact that he was entirely wrapped up in conversation with Peter Quill. Which… was actually really helpful when a very, very pregnant Kitty popped in to see how things were going on, and it was clear Kitty did  _not_ want to have to drag Peter anywhere, so having Noh mostly upright and sober to help with that part was definitely a good thing.

Wade was in  _high_  spirits by the time he had gathered up Eleanor and Lisbet — who had simply fallen in love with Annie, deciding that the two of them could be good friends, especially when Annie made mention that they should come back for Thanksgiving if they didn't have other plans.

As soon as they left, K's shoulders dropped a bit, and she gathered up the little ones to head up, complaining that she really needed a shower after how the night had turned out.


	8. Birthday Buddy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there are more little ones and also Kate's sister is poking her nose in.

 

Kate's archery class had ended a bit early that afternoon when their outdoor shooting range got in the way of a snowstorm, so she was curled up with some hot chocolate and her phone catching up with Billy while she waited for Kurt's drama class to get out. She was in the back of the auditorium only half paying attention to the kids practicing soliloquies as she and Billy went back and forth.

"Tell me about the future Kaplan," she texted, knowing that was the best way to start off a flurry of excited texts.

"She sent us the latest ultrasound. OMG!" Billy texted back, and a few seconds later included the picture to go with it. "Little boy!" he added under the picture.

"Of course. Cutest Kaplan ever," Kate replied with a little grin, glad to see her best friend so happy.

"We're bouncing around names. Soooooo hard to choose."

"Yeah, I remember."

"And she wants some say in it, so getting three people to sign off on names is HARD."

"You doing an open adoption?"

"Yeah, letters and pictures and stuff too," Billy replied. "But she's down in Arizona, so we don't know how much she'll want to be part of things way up here."

"That's really great, Billy," Kate replied. "Seriously. That kid is so lucky."

"Thanks! Can't wait to spoil him!"

Kate smirked the slightest bit. "Me neither," she replied before her phone chirped and she had to frown when she saw that she had a new email. Flicking open the email app from her texts, she frowned harder when she saw the subject line: "Thanksgiving Plans."

It was from Susan.

She let out a sigh and opened it up, fully expecting another invitation to go yachting and "get away from that brainwashing school of yours" or whatever it was Susan was spouting off this time, but… it was actually relatively civil.

_I'm in New York for the holidays and thought maybe we could try and sit down for just the one meal together. I'll even go to that school. We just haven't talked face to face in so long, and I'm out of rehab, so it's time to make some new connections and fix old problems or whatever they tell you on the way out._

Kate rubbed her temples with both hands for a moment as she considered the email — and considered the last time Susan had come to the mansion.

But then again, if K and Clint could survive their siblings for one night, she definitely didn't need the Chicken Hawk label hanging over her head when for the first time in  _years_ , Susan was actually making an effort.

And the truth was, she did miss her big sister. The one before the second marriage and the drug and alcohol problems. The one who taught her everything she knew about fashion and made it a point to tear anyone to shreds if they made fun of Kate — verbally, of course.

It would be nice to get that Susan back ... so, with a sigh, Kate sent out a quick response.

_Yes, let's get together this year. I'll have to see what the plans are for the rest of the X-Men, though. I'll get back to you on a location._

There. That would at least buy her a little time to talk to Scott — since he was the one who got Susan on that DUI last time. And maybe prep the rest of the mansion… She almost wanted to keep Susan out of the school, but then again, it would be nice to have backup…

Kate sighed. Well, at least she had a couple weeks to decide. And since Kitty was due any day, she could always tell Susan Kitty didn't want too many people near the brand new baby. It was a ready-made excuse, right?

Her phone chirped again, and she raised her eyebrows as she checked it.

_I'd really like to come there. I haven't met your family yet._

That was it — that was the whole message. Kate tipped her head back and tried not to let out a long and loud groan. She really wanted to give Susan the benefit of the doubt here… She closed her eyes and sighed, deciding to respond  _after_ she talked with Kurt. After all, he was the one who'd have to deal with the hateful sister-in-law.

_Like I said, I don't know the plans. We might be gone. I'll let you know as soon as I know._

The timing worked out well, since as she hit the send button, Kurt's class ended, and the kids all were talking much louder and milling about on their way out the door.

"It wasn't too boring, I hope," Kurt said when he appeared next to her in a cloud of violet smoke. "They really are trying hard."

"You'll make movie stars out of them yet," she said with a wave, not really paying attention and still frowning at her phone. "Is it too late to run away to Germany for Thanksgiving instead of your birthday?"

He looked a bit surprised for a second but took the time to weigh it out. "I suppose if you felt the need to wait, we could do that … but if you did that, you may have Annie to contend with. And I know both K and Clint were hoping for a distraction a little less dark than what they could come up with on their own." He sat down next to her and kissed her temple. "Bad news?"

"Sorta. Susan wants to come by for Thanksgiving. She's out of rehab, I guess."

He nodded his head as he watched her carefully. "If that's true, then this could be part of her program," he said gently. "They need to atone for what they've done wrong, people they've mistreated, things like that. She may  _need_ to do this to heal."

Kate sighed. "Yeah, she said something like that." She handed him her phone as she added, "I'm just… I don't want her screwing with you. At all."

"I can assure you will total confidence that I can take care of myself against one possibly vindictive anti-mutant problem child," Kurt said with a smirk.

"Uh-huh." She rolled her eyes and kissed his cheek. "You know what I mean. It's stupid when it's  _family_."

"She can't possibly be worse than what you've had to deal with from  _my_ family," Kurt pointed out. "Unless you left something key out about her when you told me about her. Is she a succubus? Should we be stocking more holy water?"

She let out a little laugh and shook her head. "No, she's just normal stupid."

"So not even seventy odd years of ignoring the other's existence? Normal would be nice for a change, I think," Kurt decided.

"True. But you know I'm going to get saddled with Clint comparisons now. Big sibling being stupid, tried to kill me before ... though Clint's was  _way_ more personal. You know. Fun stuff."

"If she's terrible, we can lock her in the Danger Room with your program running. If she's truly awful, she'll pick one of the 'bros' up." Kurt was smirking as he said it. "Then you might be able to retain your crown of 'stuck with the worst in-laws ever'.

"This — this is why I love you," she said, shaking her head as she leaned in to kiss him. "You're just… so ridiculous."

"Whatever it is, we'll be fine," he replied with pure confidence.

Kate took a deep breath. "So I should let her come by, is what you're telling me. And not run away to Germany."

"You should let her come by," Kurt agreed with a nod. "And if it goes wrong, I'm sure that in a house full of superheroes, we can figure out how to deal with one rehabbed addict." He smiled wider. "In fact. I'd bet that your big brother Hawk and the resident intergalactic lawyer would handle it for you happily."

"If they're not knee-deep in their own nonsense," Kate grumbled good-naturedly as she put her head on his shoulder. "Honestly. So much easier when it's just us X-Men."

"It is, but then what would we do for entertainment on major holidays?"

"Set the kids loose in their spaceships and watch?" Kate pointed out.

"We do that every weekend anyhow," he countered. "Let's go tell Scott and Annie we have one — or two? — more for the big dinner."

"Just the one I think. Hold on." Kate held up a finger and quickly emailed her sister back:  _Alright, we'll be back from Germany by then. Just you, or are you bringing a plus-one?_

The response was almost instant:  _Just me. Not too many prospects right out of the program._

"Yeah, she's on her own," Kate said with a sigh as she typed out a quick acknowledgment. She threaded her arm through Kurt's and laid her head on his shoulder. "Okay. We'll just… we'll deal with that later. For now, it is time for fall in Germany so I can practice my language skills,  _ja_?"

" _Genau_ ," he agreed with a little smirk.

"I got distracted packing, but the girls should be set, anyway. Kari  _insisted_ she wanted to stay with Noh and Jubes this time, and you know Krissy's been giving her looks all morning."

"I'm sure that between Logan, K, Jubes, and Noh, it will be fine," Kurt said. "And I'd even put money on the whole group of them ending up on K and Logan's bed. Again."

"That's not a fair bet. It happens every time any one of us leaves — unless it's K and Logan. Then they all somehow end up in ours."

"They know where they like to be," Kurt said. "And they know where they can get away with the most."

"And they know where the bamfs will take them," Kate added. "Annie will  _not_ let them snuggle in her bed. The bamfs steal her pillow. Every. Time."

"And they're afraid to take Logan or K's pillows," Kurt agreed with a smile. "Let's finish up and get moving. I'm sure Annie will be thrilled to hear of another dinner guest on our way out the door."

"She does like to cook for a crowd. Weirdo," Kate agreed as the two of them headed out of the auditorium to go find Annie — and finish up their preparations.

"Well, knowing that there will be obnoxious siblings, I'm sure K will have that mulled wine of hers brewing away in some dark corner."

She kissed his cheek. "Well, with promises like that, at least I know I'll be getting cute hungover snuggles the morning after Thanksgiving," she teased him.

"I didn't even drink that much," he grumbled. "That stuff must have rocket fuel in it."

She kissed him again. "Yes, but you're so adorable when you're trying not to fall off the edge of the bed."

"You mean grabbing onto you," he said with a smirk.

"What? Of course not. That would be taking advantage," she said in mock horror, which just had Kurt chuckling to himself.

They found Annie sitting in the living room making her list already of what she'd need for the big day as Cody played near her feet with a toy train. "You two still here?" she called out when she saw them. "I thought for sure you'd have just … disappeared after class let out."

"We were planning on it, but it turns out we needed to stop by and let you know my dear big sis is coming by for Thanksgiving," Kate said with a sigh. "So, set out one extra plate just in case she makes it that far."

"Really?" Annie asked as she looked up at them with a tiny frown. "Are there any other missing siblings I should know about?"

"No, just the one more, I think," Kate said with a sigh, shaking her head. "She just got out of rehab. Trying to mend fences or something."

"Oh, that should be fun," Annie said. "You better tell K to leave that stuff she makes off until Christmas. Don't want to tempt an addict."

"Yeah, that's a good idea. Be better for everyone if she's sober," Kate agreed with a sigh.

"Which you know will only mean K and Logan will be hiding in his office and drinking as much as they can alone," Kurt said over her shoulder.

"And I'll miss out on the cute lost Elf look," she said with a pout.

"Well, maybe not," Kurt said with a little smirk. "I can get into his office without him."

"True. And if Susan is as obnoxious as I think she'll be… I might just join you."

"Join you for what?" K asked as she hung up her coat. She'd just found her way inside after taking care of the animals, and she had a wicked smear of what Annie genuinely hoped was mud all along her right side.

"Kate's sister is fresh out of rehab, and she's trying to mend fences," Annie explained brightly. "So no drinking — she's trying to stay sober."

"The  _hell_ you say — there will be drinking," K said with a frown. "If I have to put up with my sister and be halfway human, there must be alcohol."

"Then don't put it anywhere near Kate's sister," Annie insisted.

"No problem," K replied. "I'll take over part of Logan's office and set up the copper pot in there. We can keep it to ourselves — and you can all be miserable and sober."

"Just until Susan's gone," Kate muttered. "I give her an hour tops."

"Nope. This will be an invite-only booze fest," K decided.

"Well, invite me after she's gone. I'm  _joining_ you," Kate insisted.

"Hmmm," K mused, looking her up and down slowly. "I  _suppose_ if we haven't drunk it all by then…. I'd like to get him drunk and take advantage."

"You always want to do that," Kate pointed out with a bit of a snicker.

"Not in front of  _Dad_ ," K said, pulling a face. "Go get lost in Germany. Take advantage."

"And bring you back little siblings?" Kate teased.

K shrugged. "Not up to me what you give him for his birthday," she replied before she shooed them to go. "Kiss the babies and get out."

"Well, we can only  _try_ ," Kate said with a twinkle in her eye as she pulled Kurt into a kiss — and they would have teleported off then and there if it hadn't been for a very distressed-looking Peter Quill bursting in with wide eyes.

"Nightcrawler — do you know where Logan is?" he gasped out in more of a pant than anything else.

"I can find him," Kurt promised as he took a step away from Kate and toward Quill. "What's wrong?"

"Uh ... not wrong. Not … well, okay." Peter took a deep breath. "You and Logan just ... gotta get down to the med bay. Kitty's in labor, and she was really, really,  _really_ insistent on you two being there.

Kurt's eyes widened, and he looked at Kate before he teleported away in search of Logan. It didn't take him too long to locate him — and when he did, the two of them quickly made their way to Kitty, who was clearly not very happy in the least. She was arguing with Hank, trying to convince him that she could just phase the baby and be  _done_ with it.

"My darling Katherine, if you can explain to me how you can concentrate well enough to do that while in the amount of pain you are in, then I'd be happy to discuss it, but so far, your concentration is shaky at best," Hank argued.

"I've got it, really," Kitty insisted. "I'm very,  _very_ focused right now."

"You couldn't stay in solid form long enough for me to put in an IV," Hank said patiently.

"See? I've got to concentrate  _not_ to phase. Doesn't that work?"

Logan made his way over and offered her his hand. "You need to focus on something else," he said. "Anything else. Come on, kiddo. Go back to your training and block it out."

Kitty gave him a look for a moment before she took his hand and nodded. "Fine." She took a few deep breaths as Kurt and Peter sat down on her other side and just… watched and waited.

After a little while, Kitty's face relaxed, and she looked much more focused as she quietly told Hank to put the damn IV in. "Let's get this over with," she said, though she kept her eyes closed as she tried to keep herself calm and centered.

Hank worked quickly to get her settled in, and as soon as the line was set, he was sure to give her the meds she needed to take the edge off and calm her down. And once it was all doing the job, she opened her eyes and latched on to Peter's hand — and he almost immediately started to squirm as it was obvious he was trying not to tell her she was hurting him... but, yeah, he was definitely hurting.

Logan gave him a glare that clearly read 'suck it up' while Kitty tried to work through as best she could, and although it wasn't the most difficult birth … it wasn't the easiest by a stretch, either. After a good hard push, and a muted crunching sound that had Kurt glancing toward Quill for a moment, the room relaxed together as a squeaky, angry cry pierced the near silence of the lab.

"Well, doc?" Quill asked in a slightly strained voice. "What've we got?"

Hank was smiling to himself as he cleaned up the newborn and quickly brought the baby back to the couple. "Say hello to your bouncing baby boy," Hank told them as he handed him to Kitty. She released Logan and Peter in favor of meeting her new son, and where Logan looked incredibly proud of her hard work, Quill was trying very hard not to make a face as the blood flow returned to his newly broken hand.

"He's wonderful," Kurt said, half to cover the sound of Quill sucking in air.

"Of course he is," Logan said as he gave Kitty a kiss on the top of her head. "You did good, Punkin'."

"Thanks," Kitty said without really looking up at him as she settled into a good snuggle for a moment with the brand new baby boy. But as soon as she felt like she was back on planet earth, she didn't waste a second in getting Logan's attention. "Oh, don't go anywhere, mister."

"You want me to break Quill's other hand for you?" he asked with a smirk. "Or something bigger?"

Peter shook his head at Logan hard. "No, thanks," he said.

"No, I want you to help Peter hold Jayce while his hand is like that," Kitty said, sounding almost sheepish. "And then you have to hold him, because he's  _your_ godbaby."

"Both of those sound like jobs better suited to Kurt," Logan teased. "But I'll humor your drug-addled brain — since you broke your husband."

Kitty gave him a  _look_  before she very gently handed Jayce over to Logan so he could follow her instructions, and the little guy gave Logan a halfway appraising look and seemed to settle in almost warily. Though, of course, his eyes widened and he got downright excited on hearing Peter say hi, which just had Peter laughing in near disbelief and crying a bit as he got to hold the little boy.

"You've been talking to him," Logan said with a little smirk as he had Peter sit down and he wrangled the baby into his one good arm.

"Yeah, well, he seemed to like it when he was still in there," Peter said with a beaming grin as he tipped his head at Kitty. "She hated it."

"Because he  _kicked me_ when he got excited," Kitty pointed out, shaking her head.

"Seemed to have the opposite effect on ours," Logan told her. "K was mad they listened to me." He looked toward Kurt and tipped his head to get him to come closer.

"Well, ours didn't listen to either of us," Kurt said as he slipped over to look over Peter's shoulder. "And they still don't, for that matter," he added with a quiet grin before he couldn't help but reach down and run a careful finger over the full brown curls.

Kitty sat up a bit straighter for a moment and looked at the clock with a wide smile. "Ooh! Kurt!" she said in a loud whisper. "Kurt!" When he looked up at her, Kitty grinned wider at him. "Happy birthday!"

Kurt broke into a delighted grin and then simply started to laugh. "You didn't have to go to so much trouble for my present," he teased, though it was clear he was tickled to pieces.

"Well, what else can I get the Elf who has everything?" Kitty laughed as she laid back down with a contented smile.

"You want to hold him?" Peter offered, gesturing with his head — since he was still one-handed.

Kurt looked like his grin might split his face as he nodded, and he gently took the little boy from Peter and started to whisper a few German greetings that had Jayce staring at him intently.

While Peter was still distracted, Hank came over and gave him a shot to numb him up even before he gently guided the young man back for an X-Ray to assess the damage. "Tyler is already on his way. We'll have you back to new in no time," he promised as Kurt made friendly with the newborn and Logan pulled up the chair to Kitty's bed to sit with her.

"I don't really mind," Peter assured him with a crooked grin — his focus anywhere but his hand.

"Your fingers are turning blue," Hank pointed out. "Believe me; you'll mind."

Peter looked down at his hand and winced, then blew out his breath. "Yeah, okay. Fix me up." He was still half looking over his shoulder, though, and he had a little disbelieving smile on. "Isn't he perfect?"

"Just like his mother," Hank replied with a smirk as he didn't bother warning Quill before he set the fingers back to the way they needed to be.

Quill shouted out for a moment and snapped his focus back to Hank. "He-ey."

"Three," Hank said quietly before he gave the hand a twist that crunched and ground a bit — but almost immediately, the color started to go back to normal.

Peter shook his head out and just … "Ow." He looked down at his fingers and sighed out a little laugh, though. "She's got a killer grip."

"Ninja training," Hank explained. "Now, keep that elevated. As soon as Tyler comes in, you'll be without need of any further intervention."

"And then I can hold him again," Quill said, his gaze back on Kitty with Kurt and Logan.

"That is the plan," Hank replied with a little smirk.

"He's perfect, doc." Quill was clearly not coming down from his high anytime soon, so Hank had to smile and shake his head at the whole thing.

Not that Kitty was that far behind. She was completely wrapped up in her happiness — and in having her favorite people around her — until she realized… "Oh! Weren't you going to Germany?" Kitty asked Kurt.

Kurt glanced over at Kitty and blinked a couple of times before he had to nod. "We can wait if you want us to stay here and help—"

"Help with what? Cover Logan in glitter?" Kitty giggled as Logan gave her a look. "Pretty sure we can do that without you."

Kurt grinned Logan's way as well and had to shake his head before he crossed over to where Kitty was and gently tipped Jayce into her arms again. He gave her a little kiss on the cheek as he did so. "Congratulations,  _katzchen_."

"Have one of the demons kidnap K and Jubes down here while it's still fresh," Kitty said with a grin. "And have  _fun_ on your trip, you little imp."

Kurt chuckled at that and gave her another kiss on the cheek before he teleported away — arriving in the living room where Kate and K had been talking all of two seconds before one of the bamfs whisked K off to go heed Kitty's call to glitter.

"Well, you look all… glowy," Kate said with a giggle as she looked Kurt over.

"I got to hold Jayce," Kurt said with a broad smile. "My little birthday buddy."

"You're never going to ever not call him that, are you?" Kate asked with a teasing grin as she leaned over and started to kiss the line of his jaw.

"It's my duty now," he replied with a laugh.

"Clearly," she said, still smiling as she kept up with the kisses. "You're still dripping in glitter, you know. That look is  _dangerous_."

"I like danger," he said as he swept her off of her feet and returned the kisses.

"You know, I think I do too," she replied with a little giggle as she rearranged herself so she was properly situated with her arms around his neck. "What say we rush off to Germany and go make some danger of our own?"

"I'd be a fool to argue with that kind of logic," Kurt replied before he simply teleported off with her without so much as a backward glance.


	9. Sisters Invasion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Thanksgiving goes about as well as you'd think.
> 
> (I love that this chapter just HAPPENED to go up the week of Thanksgiving. Unplanned but wonderful timing)

 

It was mid-morning on Thanksgiving Day, and Kurt was in the enviable position of lead storyteller as far as the kids at Xaviers were concerned. He had every single one of the kids cuddled up around him as he told them the fable of the first-ever Thanksgiving.

"And when the Pilgrims landed in this new world," Kurt explained to his captivated audience, "they saw how beautiful it was, and they were so thankful to have made it this far."

"My papa came here from  _further_ away," Krissy whispered under her breath to Charlie, who shushed her and looked supremely upset that Krissy was interrupting the sanctity of storytime.

"And they were greeted by the people who already lived in America," Kurt added, though he was sure to skew Krissy's little headband on her head.

"And they brought  _food_ ," Chance added helpfully, and the other kids were pretty sure he was doing that mostly for the look his sister gave him for interrupting.

"Yes, they did," Kurt said with a warm smile. "They brought a special treat called maize. And they showed the Pilgrims the food and the warmth of America." As all the kids nodded their heads at the story, he leaned in close to them. "That's the important thing to remember about this story, little ones: these Pilgrims came from so far away, and they had such a long journey. But they came here to find hope. And that is what you must always remember. Your home, here, is where hope and love will always wait for you. So we say our thanks every year. Even those of us that aren't strictly American," he added with a little chuckle.

When his words were greeted by that same chorus of nodding heads, he smiled at his little audience. "So, I want you to think of something that you are thankful for today. Can you do that? We can all share with each other."

The little ones all began to nod their heads in unison, eyes bright and focused on him. But it was Chance who burst out with, "I'm thankful for everybody!  _All_ my family and my friends — because they are all  _here_ and not gone away."

Charlie giggled and patted her brother's arm as she said with a little, crooked smile, "I'm thankful for little brothers."

"And little sisters!" Krissy burst out, holding Kari's hand and looking supremely satisfied.

"Sissers!" was the almost immediate agreement from Kari.

Gerry grinned at the two little elflings before he settled his shoulders importantly. "I'm thankful for doctors and people who help put hurt people back together," he said. "I'm gonna be one someday," he added to Krissy, who giggled and nodded.

Elin waited a little while until Kurt looked her way, and she just grinned and said very clearly, "Cupcake kisses." Then, she broke out into giggles that were echoed by most of the other little ones, though Charlie didn't look nearly as amused as the rest of them did, even if her brother looked  _delighted_.

"Ooh I'm thankful for cookies!" Sying called out happily.

"And Mommy," Cody put in. "Mommy cookies."

"Elf," James muttered with a crooked smile as he snuggled up with Krissy and Kari.

"He loves them," Elin said in a whisper to Kurt with wide eyes.

"I think they love him very much too," Kurt whispered back with a little smile.

She grinned his way and threw her arms around his neck. "Snuggles?"

He smiled and swept her up for a kiss on the temple. "Yes. I am very, very grateful for snuggles," he replied with a little laugh — though of course, the kids seemed to take that as a cue to dogpile on him. Very soon, Kurt was entirely pinned down by a small army of giggling kids — and bamfs, who thought it was a  _grand_ idea to pile on their big brother.

K and Logan came out of his office a short while later, half stumbling, laughing quietly, and rather … involved.

"If you need a little something to warm up with, office is open to you," Logan muttered Kurt's way.

Kurt grinned at him from where he was still pinned on the floor. "When I have so many little cuddlers?" he teased. "Maybe later."

"Suit yourself," he replied, though the two little ferals didn't really look back as they headed off to find a quiet corner. They were just getting a bit distracted when the doorbell rang and Kate very clearly made it known that she thought one of them should have gotten it as she crossed the room to answer the door.

"Am I terribly early?" Lisbet asked when Kate opened the door with a wary smile, even though Wade was certainly enthusiastic on saying hello to her, picking her up and spinning her around with an almost girlish giggle.

Kate high-fived Wade, of course, then looked toward Lisbet. "We're all headed down to dinner in just a bit," she said before she turned her attention back to Wade. "You missed the part where Kurt was telling stories. Eleanor would have enjoyed it. I heard there was an Elfish snuggle pile."

"There should  _always_ be an Elfish snuggle pile," Wade said sagely before he turned his attention to where Kurt and the kids were. "Bamfmaster! Why didn't anyone tell me when the dogpile was? I am  _so there._ " He started toward them at a jog —clearly ready to just dive in with them.

Krissy giggled and shook her finger at Wade with one hand on her hips. "No, you too big! You squish the little kids!"

"But then who can I cuddle?" Wade asked, doing his best to look dejected.

Krissy laughed delightedly and rushed over to him to all but tackle him in her best snuggle. "I cuddle you!" she promised him, with Kari not far behind just wanting to be where her big sister was.

"Promise?" Wade asked as they started to pull on him to get him to the floor. When the girls nodded, it was all he was waiting for before he crumpled, making all kinds of noise as they 'defeated' him in combat. He was carrying on about biting off kneecaps — to the kids' delight — when Lisbet walked the rest of the way into the room to observe and also to give her sister a bit of flack for being too wrapped up in her husband rather than cooking or playing with the little ones.

"With this many mouths to feed, don't you think you should at least be  _helping_?" Lisbet asked, the disapproval clear in her tone, though before she could get too much further in razzing K, the ever-intrepid Chance came over with his head tipped to the side and Charlie's hand in his. It was clear the little Summers girl could just  _tell_ K was unhappy with the line of questioning her sister had dove into.

Charlie climbed up into K's lap to give her a kiss as soon as Logan slid her into the seat next to him on the couch. And Chance had apparently been assigned by his sister to Lisbet, because he tugged on the hem of her skirt. " _My_ mom is making dinner," he said in a proud tone.

"Well at least  _someone_ —"

"Nobody else is  _allowed_ in the kitchen," Chance continued with a sharp, stubborn sort of nod. " _Just_  Mommy."

Lisbet raised an eyebrow at that but let out a little, "Oh?" She glanced over at Logan and K with Charlie and had to smirk a bit. No longer wondering why K was taking the opportunity to assault her husband. Free time.

"Well," Charlie allowed, "Leslie Ann is helping, but only 'cause she growed the green beans."

At the twins' apparent insistence on setting her straight, Lisbet clearly didn't have much of a leg to stand on for teasing her sister, and she knew it — not when the little ones clearly loved K and Annie didn't  _want_ anyone else in the kitchen.

"She's a Southerner," K explained. "And cooking for a crowd was always  _your thing,_ not mine."

Lisbet had to agree as she settled into the seat on the couch next to her sister, more than happy to get the two ferals cornered for questions. She still had so so many about everything between them — and all the years she'd missed K — and to her relief, it looked as though Logan … was actually  _helping_ her. He kept a decent grip on his wife so she couldn't slip away, though that backfired when Wade came to squeeze in on Lisbet's opposite side.

"I see you're makin' nice with the in-laws," Wade said in a cheerful tone — there was no mistaking the smile in his voice as he reached past both women to grab a hold of Logan's arm. "Good to see. Good to see."

"Wilson..." Logan started to say, but Lisbet was quick to cut him off.

"He adores the two of you — talks about you all the time," she said with a smile and a look that was so much like K's when she was being perfectly reasonable that Logan had to just sit back and let the comment pass. K, however, was waiting for him to counter the commentary. But when it never came… she stared at him in disbelief.

He gave her a long kiss and Charlie let out a giggle when they heard Noh a few rooms over continuing Kurt's storytime.

The two ferals shared a look, and before Logan could snatch his wife up to disappear back into the office where the booze was, Lisbet got started with her line of questions. It was benign enough that neither of the men in attendance seemed bothered much. Lisbet was asking all about her family life, her kids, her grandkids, her adopted space boys… It was all stuff K wouldn't have minded too terribly to talk about if not for the fact that Lisbet seemed to find a way to ask all her questions as if they were accusations for holding out on her for so long.

And when Lisbet wasn't asking accusatory questions, Wade was interjecting his own questions to his 'brother' that were borderline not safe for any audiences.

So both K and Logan were in a grumpy mood already by the time Annie sent Leslie Ann out to tell everyone that dinner was ready — which was a direct contrast to how Kate seemed to be doing. The resident Hawkeye looked almost hopeful as she kept glancing at the door; her sister still hadn't come, and it was clear Kate was hoping Susan had just chickened out.

But as everyone took their seats at the dinner table — with the kids sitting at their own little table and with Storm wisely seating Wade and Lisbet on the opposite side of the table from K and Logan — there was a knock at the front door, and Kate visibly wilted.

When Kurt saw the expression on her face as she stood up to go get the door, he teleported in front of her and pulled her into a warm kiss first and foremost and then took her hand to teleport her to the entryway. "Remember: she is trying to mend fences," he whispered in her ear before he took the slightest of steps aside, just so that it would be easier for Kate to greet her sister without a half-demon at her side. No matter how much Kate insisted it was Susan's problem and not his, Kurt couldn't help but want to make things easier in any way he could.

Susan stood there in the doorway for a moment with an obvious frown on her face even after the door had opened, but as Kurt watched, he could see Kate almost melt with relief when Susan didn't immediately burst out with anything horrible and instead asked, "Can I come in?"

And despite everything, despite all the mean things Susan had said and all the trouble she'd caused, Kate ended up wrapping her big sister in a warm hug that lasted longer than she'd meant it to — especially because she hadn't even meant to hug her in the first place. But it had been ages since she'd seen Susan, and the last time they'd been in the same space had been on good terms. They hadn't actually  _seen_ each other since their feud started.

But Susan was still her big sister, and all at once, Kate simply melted into her. "Missed you, Susie," she muttered. It took Susan so entirely off-guard that she didn't have any response but to hug Kate back.

Kurt watched the reunion with a soft smile that somehow still stayed on his face as he offered his hand to Susan once the two Bishop sisters broke apart, despite the obvious disdainful glare that Susan gave him. " _Guten abend_ ," he said politely, the smile only slipping slightly when Susan didn't take the proffered hand.

Kate frowned at her sister for a long moment before she let out a sigh. "Susan, this is Kurt.  _My husband_ ," she said pointedly.

"I know," was the simple response before, grudgingly, she finally tipped her head at him. "I'm Susan."

"It's nice to meet you in person," Kurt said, and though his smile was genuine, Kate could see that his tail was still — not at all relaxed.

"I'm sure." Susan regarded Kurt warily and didn't take a step closer to him, keeping Kate between herself and Kurt. "Well. Let's just…."

"Dinner's ready," Kate supplied for her, and Susan looked relieved to hear it. "We were all sitting down when you got here."

"All?" Susan repeated.

"My team and their families," Kate said with a nod. "And some of the kids who don't have places to go. Come on; I'll introduce you."

"Oh, I don't—"

"Come on. It's  _way_ past time for you to meet my family."

But Susan stopped at that and pulled her hand free of Kate's. "Kate,  _I_ am your family. I'm the  _last_ one."

Kate turned to face her sister, her eyebrows up at her hairline. Neither of them realized it, but with Susan's dyed-black-and-red hair and Kate's black-with-purple-highlights as she grayed… they looked almost exactly alike as both of them gave each other clear once-overs.

"That's not how marriage works, Suze," Kate said at last, quietly.

"Oh, right. Are we counting spouses now?" Susan shook her head like she simply couldn't believe the idea. "Are you going to start inviting any of our ex-step-moms to stuff? Where's  _Heather_ , then?"

"That's not the same."

"Isn't it? Katie, do you even remember my second husband's name?" Susan shot back with a bite to her tone that had both Kate and Kurt a bit surprised.

"I thought it was Jim?"

Susan paused and then nodded. "Yeah."

"He was a jerk, Susan. You can do better," Kate said softly.

Susan looked like she was ready to retort with something like 'so can you,' the way she was drawing herself up, but Kate's soft tone had disarmed her. For a long moment, she just stared at her little sister before, at last, she waved her off. "Whatever, Katie. Are we doing this stupid dinner thing or not?"

Kate sighed and nodded before she led her big sister to the gathered group in the dining room — though faced with that many mutants in one place, it was clear that Susan didn't know what to do with herself, her entire body tense as Kate half pulled her into a seat.

K and Logan shared a look, and with a nearly inaudible whistle, both of them looked toward Lisbet, who had one eyebrow raised in question. " _I_ _nte tillförlitlig_?" Lisbet asked, not surprised in the least when both Logan and K confirmed it.

" _Goddag yxskaft,_ " K said very clearly, though Logan frowned at the expression and gave her a look that clearly read he had no idea what the hell she was talking about, even as Lisbet giggled and nodded. "I'll explain later," K promised before she gave her husband a kiss, though it just opened the door for the two sisters to begin very quickly chatting in Swedish, leaving both of their men a bit lost in translation.

Scott was seated a little ways from the Wagners and Susan, and he was giving Susan an appraising look, though it really spoke to how hammered Susan had been when they last saw each other that she looked at him and frowned, clearly not placing him. He shook his head and kept his comment to himself — though clearly not entirely, because Rachel Summers had to hide the little snicker behind her hand at whatever her dad was very clearly thinking.

Thankfully, by that time, most of the group had already dug into the meal and were in their own little groups chatting away. Storm had managed to intervene and was monopolizing most of Lisbet's attention with a curious question about her literature tastes, so K and Logan were even in better moods talking and not-so-subtly stealing kisses with their heads together. So there wasn't too much attention on the newcomer, and Susan seemed to be genuinely relieved by it.

"I didn't realize there would be… so many," she muttered to Kate, looking like she was terrified sitting at a table with so many 'terrorists' in one place.

"I guess you were used to a much smaller family gathering, hon?" Annie asked with a sweet smile as she leaned over to pass Susan some of the food. It was obvious that she was trying to be nice, and Kate appreciated the effort, though Susan looked mortally offended by being called 'hon' by anyone at the school.

"No, we used to have huge parties at the house. Not family, just ... parties," Susan said with a bit of a snooty tone, though she took the potatoes and scooped some out onto her plate all the same.

"Families're better," Kate muttered, which got Susan to glance her way for a moment and glare at Kate as if it was a betrayal.

"They  _should_ be," she muttered.

"Hey. You're here, aren't you?" Kate shot back.

"Took you long enough."

Kate's eyes flashed. "Now, listen—" But before she could really get started, Kurt's tail had wrapped around her wrist to pull back the pointed finger she was about to stick in her sister's face, and she glanced over to look at Kurt, who quietly shook his head.

"This is a family gathering," he told her quietly, and she let out all her breath.

" _Sie nervt mich_ ," Kate whispered under her breath, though that only got Kurt to give her a little kiss on the temple.

"Can you two  _not_ do that while I'm around?" Susan asked, frowning at the obvious display of affection ... or possibly at the fact that Kurt's tail was around her sister's wrist ... or possibly at the German. It was hard to tell what she was mad at in that moment, with so many things to choose from.

"Yeah, no. No, we can't," Kate said with a glare her sister's way. "If you hate it that much, you can always just leave."

"I think I will," Susan said, starting to get up, though she was only partially standing when Kari came running into the dining room, tearing streaming down her cheeks, with Zoe hot on her heels looking ready to defend her best friend against … whatever it was that had her so upset.

Kari went straight to her dad, snuggling right into him and still crying as both Kurt and Kate shared looks. Kate immediately defused as she pressed a little kiss to Kari's forehead, trying to figure out what it was that had their little girl so upset, while Kurt held her close and muttered out comforting things in German — but that seemed to put Susan over the edge.

"What… what is  _that_?" Susan asked, her voice shrill as she pointed a shaky finger at Kari. Her expression was somewhere between terror and pure loathing, and while Kate and Kurt were occupied with the very upset little one — and Zoe, who kept trying to help but didn't quite have the vocabulary to communicate what was wrong just yet outside of "Kari scared" — that wasn't the case for K, who had clearly had it with the older Bishop sister.

A hush fell over the table as everyone gathered was watching carefully to see how this was going to play out, but they should have known. The moment that Susan had  _screeched,_ the ferals in the room had stiffened — and Logan, K, and even Lisbet were all glaring Susans' way.

"That," K said in a tone filled with just as much loathing as Susan had been using, "is my goddaughter." She stood up quickly, and Logan didn't even try to stop her. K didn't give Susan any warning before she'd picked her up by the back of her jeans and bodily carried her out of the dining room, all goodwill gone the moment Susan had seen Kari.

Susan was shaking with rage and terror in K's hands, but that didn't slow K down in the least as she carried her past the others, through the entryway, and kicked open the front door, winding back to see how much distance she could get as she threw Susan out, literally.

"If you can't say anything nice," K said as she heaved her backward for the throw. "Shut the hell up,  _dumbom_." With all her effort, K let Susan fly.

Susan made it about thirty yards before she landed in a snowbank. She stood up with a huff, dusting the snow off of her designer jacket, though she couldn't hold the glare at all with K growling low at her the way she was.

For all the stupidity she had caused thus far, Susan was at least smart enough to realize when it was time to turn tail, and she simply strode off down the driveway, her nose in the air as she muttered to herself about mutants the whole way.

K glared as she watched Susan leave, though when she turned back around, it was to find Logan smirking at her. "Nice air, sweetheart."

K took a couple steps forward and stole a kiss. "I would have gotten her further if she hadn't been wiggling so much," she said, and Logan grinned at her for that one.

"I guess we can break out the booze with the addict gone," Logan said with a little smile as he pulled her further into the house, half wrapped up with her as they went. "Might make the rest of this easier."

"Please," K said — and the two of them slipped off to his office to bring out the  _glögg_ that K had stashed there ... though Lisbet's entire attitude shifted when she smelled it.

"Papa's recipe?" she asked with wide eyes and a growing smile. K nodded and set her up with a mug before she sat down with her husband.

Just like that, the whole mood of the room shifted, and everyone started to loosen up just a bit — though they were all slightly more cautious after their last encounter with K's warm wine concoction.

* * *

Translations:

From Swedish:

 _I_ _nte tillförlitlig_? - not good/reliable

 _Goddag yxskaft_ \- God damned ax shaft (stupid person)

 _Dumbom_ \- roughly, an idiot

… _.._

From German:

 _Sie nervt mich_ \- She's getting on my nerves


	10. What Scared Kari

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a few different storylines are starting to converge...

 

While the adults had been putting up with obnoxious siblings and holiday drama, the kids had their own table in the next room over, and they were definitely not having any such problems.

Gerry spent most of the dinner regaling all the kids with stories of his adventures at school. He absolutely loved Kindergarten, and since the twins would be starting school next fall, they were eating up his every word, eyes wide with their little chins in their hands as Gerry imparted his wisdom.

"And I'm not big enough to play in the other half of the playground. You gotta be in third grade or older to play there, but sometimes some of the kids in my class try to sneak off, and they're not very good at being sneaky, because they keep getting caught," Gerry told his captive audience.

"Do  _you_ sneak there?" Charlie asked, one eyebrow raised, though when Gerry gave her a sideways grin, it was clear she was having a hard time looking severe.

"That's a secret," Gerry said importantly, which had Chance laughing, especially when Charlie couldn't even come up with a good response for that.

"Gerry gonna show us how to do stuff when we get to school," Krissy agreed, looking very proud of her fellow Hawk.

Gerry nodded his fervent agreement. "Mmhmm," he said. "'Cause that's what big brothers do."

"Big brother, big head," Zoe whispered to Kari, who giggled madly, especially when the bamfs — who had more or less been designated the babysitters for this group and were taking their duties as seriously as could be expected of the group — started miming bigger and bigger heads, pretending to tip over from the weight of their own imaginary, huge heads.

Gerry glanced over at the bamfs and started to laugh when he saw what they were up to. "You gotta do it  _right_ ," he informed the nearest bamf as he started to dramatically pretend that his head was growing, falling sideways with a look of terror as the bamfs fell apart in little giggles at the little boy's antics.

"Big brother, big head," Zoe said in a tone that said Gerry was only proving her earlier pronouncement right, and both Kari and the bamfs fell apart in little giggles all over again.

"You gonna go to school with us, Sying?" Krissy asked curiously while most of the group of little ones was still distracted with the 'big head' silliness.

"Mommy says so," Sying said with a sage little nod. "She wants me to make lots of friends."

"But  _I'm_ your friend," Krissy said, frowning.

"Uh-huh," Sying agreed, nodding seriously. "You can make friends too."

"I don't wanna make  _new_ ones. I like  _these_ ones," Krissy said, still frowning at the prospect.

"We'll go together," Elin broke in when it looked like Krissy was starting to get herself nice and worked up. "All of us — okay?"

Krissy thought about it for a second, her little face scrunched up in concentration, before she just let out all her breath. "I  _guess_ ," she allowed, and Elin smiled and patted her hand.

"No worrying, Krissy," Sying said earnestly. "We go together, so you have friends — even if nobody else is very nice."

Krissy shot him a sort of look for that one, and Gerry shook his head hard enough that his blond curls bounced. " _Everybody_ will wanna be friends with Krissy. I mean, she's  _purple_. How can you  _not_ wanna be friends with Krissy?" he said in a tone that clearly said the whole idea of Krissy not having friends was simply ridiculous.

Chance grinned and nodded along with his best friend. "Yeah, we like Krissy."

"See?" Gerry climbed out of his seat so he could scoot around the table and wrap up the little purple elfling in a big hug. "Nothing is scary about school, I promise!"

"Besides," Charlie said, trying to join in the reassuring efforts, "you don't have to go for a  _while_. You got lots of time here with everybody else first!"

Krissy looked mollified by the efforts of all her friends to reassure her, though it was when Sying assured her, "If you don't go, I don't go; I can learn all my school things from Dad's ship anyway," that she broke into a little giggle and kissed his cheek, which started a whole new conversation as everyone started to tease the two of them.

The whole thing was entirely too adorable, but while the kids were teasing each other back and forth, they were completely oblivious to the fact that there was a new player on the stage, a blue-skinned assassin who had managed to slip past the outer security and was watching the small children with one eyebrow quirked up and a frown pushing at her expression as Mystique considered the best way to make her approach.

She knew it was a desperate move, but Kurt had been absolutely no help in telling her where he'd hidden his father. And she simply  _had_ to find him, or she would go insane.

The real trick here would be getting in undetected. While the children were more or less separate from their parents, the door connecting that room to the living room was open, and Mystique had noticed several of the adults — as well as a few of the junior team members — peeking in at regular intervals to make sure all was well. Then there was the fact that those little blue rats were looking after their playmates…

Then again, maybe she didn't want to make a subtle entrance. Better that Kurt knew she was there, knew what the stakes were, so that he would fold to her demands at last and just  _tell her_ where he was keeping Azazel. He was really so easy to manipulate when it came to his little family; it was a weakness.

So, Mystique set to work on the window. She would at least disable the security so her entrance would be a surprise — but once she was in, she wouldn't worry too much over whether anyone knew she was there. Besides, surely they would all come running when they heard the kids.

* * *

Mistral had settled into a good spot to watch the holiday goings on long before the day even started. The security at the mansion was top notch, and she really wanted to get a second crack at it, to come back when they were on higher alert and not in the more festive, relaxed mood they were now. There were really no settings in place to stop a breeze from blowing across the lawn, which was how she found herself in the branches of a tree, binoculars trained on the window as she observed Susan Bishop's interactions with the people there.

When Mistral had seen that Miss Bishop wanted her to break into the X-Men's mansion, she had been a little wary. Every mutant on the planet knew the X-Men, knew the good they had done, knew them as heroes.

Even Mistral wasn't above some starry-eyed admiration, though since meeting Gambit, she wasn't quite so doe-eyed as she had been when she was younger. Not because he didn't live up to the hype — quite the opposite — but because it was one thing to admire from afar and another to  _know_ the object of admiration.

So Mistral had tried to come into this job with a grain of salt; there were black sheep in every organization, so it was entirely possible that one of the famed X-Men had simply married wrong. That kind of thing was common enough in Mistral's line of work, after all.

But still, Mistral had a feeling that it was more likely that Susan Bishop was simply overselling the matter and that she would have to teach her a lesson later for wasting her time. But she also wasn't going to turn down a job that took her to the famous institute. Every mutant she knew would have killed for a chance to be this close; she wasn't going to squander an opportunity like this when it was dropped in her lap!

So, Mistral relaxed in her hiding spot as she watched Miss Bishop knock on the door to the mansion — and she wasn't too surprised to find that Nightcrawler and Hawkeye greeted her cordially, even if it was clear there was some tension between the two sisters… right up until the younger Bishop girl wrapped her sister in a hug.

A slight smile touched Mistral's expression as she dissolved for a moment into the wind so that she could get closer, breezing across the doorway with the fall air to see the awkward family reunion a bit closer up before she returned to a hiding spot inside the mansion, hiding in the duct work.

It was always harder to hold her gaseous form for long periods of time, but Mistral managed it all the same, watching as the Bishop girl tried her best to be polite to the Wagner family. But thus far… there was nothing to suggest the kind of treatment that Susan had suggested was happening.

Mistral had just decided to do a little investigating of her own when she noticed something that only another thief would have seen — the dangling wire that meant someone had cut a security system.

Mistral breezed through the small room where all the little ones were gathered, curious. She had been through the security workup of the mansion several times over, and she hadn't been able to get her hands on anything like blueprints. Cutting a system like this meant that whoever did it had to know what  _kind_ of system it was as well as how to disable it, and all Mistral had been able to find out about this place was that its systems simply didn't exist anywhere else on earth.

So more than likely, this new player had been inside the house before, and that, more than anything else, had Mistral's curiosity piqued.

But there was something else, too, a flash of anger, as she took her attention from the security wiring to the occupants of the room — and she realized that not a one of them could have been older than elementary school age.

Mistral's attention to the intruder turned from curiosity to anger. What thief with  _any_ honor would break into the room full of children?

A couple of the little ones — one with Nightcrawler's distinctive tail, though with pink fur, and one who looked strikingly like Wolverine — were playing near the window, and when it cracked open the slightest bit, the fact that the two babies (they couldn't possible have been two years old yet) were so close to whoever this was decided it for Mistral.

Instead of the usual light breeze that kept her from being detected, Mistral turned up her powers to nearly gale force as, before the blue-skinned woman could even open the window all the way, Mistral bowled her over.

Mystique jumped to her feet, obviously surprised and completely clueless as to what had just hit her. She thought at first that it might have been another alien security measure, but that was about as far as she got before the hurricane-force wind picked her up.

Mystique shapeshifted in the air, straining to fight against the force that had her in its grasp, but no matter what form she took, she just kept going up, up, up…

And then, at tremendous speed, the wind plowed her into the ground. She was knocked out almost instantly before she could even come up with a solid defense against this formless adversary, and the sound of the impact was enough to scare some of the kids, who heard it through the cracked open window.

* * *

It had actually been the wind that had scared Kari, since she was closest to the window when Mistral blew past her on her way to Mystique, and the sight of Mystique flying up into the air had only sent more of the kids into a panic.

Kari and Zoe had run to Kari's parents, while the bamfs had quickly teleported several of the kids to the safety of the Danger Room. Dani had nearly torn the door handle off in a mad rush to go find her dad — and so it was Dani that Remy ran into as he was bringing over a pumpkin pie for the kids to eat for dessert.

"What's de rush,  _petit_?" he asked with a little frown as the little girl very nearly bowled him over.

She looked up at him, wide-eyed, for only a moment before she simply seized his hand. "There's a strange lady outside!"

Remy stopped short, reaching into his coat pocket for his bo staff as he said, "Go get your dad,  _petit_. He gon' wanna know if there's trouble." He paused only long enough to make sure Dani was following his instructions before he ran into the room that the kids had been playing in.

The first thing he saw was the open window, and he rushed toward it, sure that it meant someone had managed to get  _into_ the mansion — until he saw the two unconscious women just outside the window.

He didn't immediately understand it, but he knew better than to question it when he saw that Mystique had been knocked out, and he reached for his comm to call for backup. "Nightcrawler, you gon' wanna come out here," he said even as he climbed out of the window to approach the blonde sneak thief that he had been flirting with for the past few months. "And bring a few friends," he added on seeing the large purple bruise on Mystique's forehead.

The familiar  _bamf_ echoed just behind Remy as Kurt arrived on the scene, though the blue-furred X-Man took an obvious step back on seeing his mother knocked out in the grass on the lawn … and on seeing Remy with a young blonde pulled up in his arms.

"I'm tinkin' you gon' need to keep her somewhere," Remy said as he adjusted his hold on the little blonde thief.

"Right," Kurt said, frowning at the blonde for a moment longer before he simply teleported away with Mystique to take her to the cell that had once held Sabretooth — grabbing Henry along the way to let him know what was going on so that Henry could keep an eye on things and provide backup if necessary.

Remy, meanwhile, readjusted his grip on the blonde sneak thief before he brought her around the side of the mansion. He didn't want to take her inside just yet. She was fun to flirt with, but he didn't know if he could trust her in the house. But he also wasn't going to let anyone cross examine her before he spoke with her.

He had intended to take her all the way to Storm's gardens, but she started to stir awake halfway through the trip, and when he eyes started to flutter open, she leaned into him for just a moment before she gasped, realized what she was doing, and pushed away from him, nearly tumbling out of his arms. But she didn't turn into a light breeze, and he caught her again before she could fall.

"Woah now, where you goin',  _cher_?" Remy asked, and for a moment — he might have imagined it — he thought she might have relaxed when she heard his voice.

"There was… a woman," she said in a voice heavy with exhaustion. "She wanted to come in to your home — which would not be so bad eef not for those darleeng leetle ones."

"You knocked her out; she got a bruise on her head somethin' fierce," Remy assured her, and she relaxed just that much more.

"Oooh," she moaned as she readjusted herself, her eyebrows drawn together. "I do not like to do zat; I do not like becoming a storm."

"If Mystique been comin' after de kids, you did de right ting,  _cher_ ," he promised her with fire in his gaze and his tone.

She laughed lightly at the expression on his face. "Are any of zem yours?" she asked.

"Dey all mine,  _cher_ ," he couldn't help but tease. "Uncle Gambit gettin' mobbed every year by all his friends' little ones."

"You know what I meant, " she said, shaking her head at him.

"You askin' if ol' Gambit got any attachments? 'Cause if you are, you ain't been paying close enough attention," he said, the smile broadening as he reached the swing in Ororo's garden that he had intended to set her down on in the first place.

He didn't  _really_ set her down, of course, not in any real sense. He simply sat down with her, still holding her gently as she recovered from the exhaustion of pushing her powers to that point. And for her part, she didn't seem to be trying to get away from him.

Still, he knew that the other X-Men would want answers, and they wouldn't take his pretty sneak thief's presence at the mansion with Mystique the way he wanted them to. "Whatchu doin' sneakin' round de school,  _cher_?" he asked gently, and she glanced up at him with a small frown for a moment, as if she was sizing up what to tell him.

"Someone ... zey were telling lies about one of your teammates," she said at last. "But luckily for you, I always do my re-search before I take a job." She let out a long breath and shook her head. "I had my suspicions already, but I am not so naive to think even zee X-Men do not have a bad apple or two, no?"

"Dat depend on how you pickin' de apples," Remy said with the slightest of smirks, and she just responded with a single quirked eyebrow his way.

"At anee rate," she said slowly, "ze accusations, zey were unfounded. And where I was investigating, I saw zat you had an unexpected visitor."

"Yeah," Remy had to agreed, nodding along to every word she said. "You knocked her out real good,  _cher_ ," he added, this time with a smile creeping its way over his face. "You musta hit her real hard."

"Zat," she said, sitting up a little taller and rearranging her shoulders, "is what happens when you hit zee ground at zee speed of an hurricane."

Remy let out a low whistle and raised both eyebrows. "You gon' do dat to everybody what crossed you sideways?"

She shook her head and waved away his concern. "She made me angry, breaking into a room full of  _les enfants_." Her eyes flashed for a moment before she arranged her expression into a far more pleasant one. "Usually, I simply remove such an offender. Or put electricity through them." She gave him a knowing sort of smile at that, and he couldn't help but chuckle.

"You know de X-Men gon' wanna know 'bout dis," he pointed out to her.

"Can't you just… tell zem what I 'ave told you?" she asked, her pink lips poked out in a perfect pout.

"'Fraid not,  _cher_ ," he told her, and he honestly tried to look sorry about it.

"I t'ink perhaps I am starting to regret my involvement," she said softly, but he just laughed.

"If you did, you sure 'nough wouldn't be talkin' wit me right now," he pointed out. "You gon' be jus' fine. Ol' Gambit ain't gon' let anybody make you do nothin' you don' want."

She gave him an appraising look for a good long time, clearly working out whether or not she could trust him, before she gave him a single nod. "This is fair," she decided. "But you 'ave no way to introduce me to your team," she added, though this time her tone had slipped into something far more playful.

"They gon' love you anyway," he assured her, but she waved off his promise with a little laugh.

"Of course zey will," she said. "I just mean zat you do not have a name with which to introduce me."

"True," he said, nodding thoughtfully. "You do have de advantage dere,  _cher_."

"You may call me Mistral," she told him, and his eyes lit up with a smile.

"Dat's jus' your workin' name," he told her, and he had to grin even wider at the surprised smile tugging at her mouth as she realized that he had really done his homework on her.

" _Oui_ ," she agreed, matching her smile to his but not giving anything else away.

He chuckled and shook his head as he gently shifted out from underneath her. "We gon' go see de X-Men now, and if you real nice, you can hit Mystique again for angerin' you so."


	11. Broken Spells and Christmas Trees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Doc Strange shows up to help and Scott takes his godfather duties very seriously.

 

Meanwhile, Kurt had taken Mystique to the cell underneath the mansion, and Henry arrived just a few moments later to help him make sure it was secure. The last thing they needed was to let her slip away again, though Henry couldn't help but shoot a sideways glance at Kurt as the fuzzy blue X-Man was fairly  _livid_ with his mother.

"Why are you  _here_?" Kurt started out with a growl. "Stalking the children? Do you have a death wish? Because I'm sure it could be granted by any number of the parents you just crossed."

But Mystique returned the glare with as much heat as she could. "Where are you hiding him?" she returned, not answering the question at all when she clearly had a much more important mission in mind.

"Hiding who?" Kurt asked with a glare.

"Azazel. I  _know_  he's here," she said.

"What makes you so certain?" Kurt asked.

She let out a noise of frustration and shook her head. "I can't even stray far from this  _ridiculous_ school anymore. He has to be here someplace. Tell me so I can just be done with it!" she demanded, looking and sounding almost desperate, which was not something he was accustomed to seeing from her.

He let out a breath and shook his head. "No. I won't help you to find him."

She glared at him for a moment before she broke into a small laugh. "Darling, don't make this difficult. I know you don't want him around any more than I do."

"I couldn't help you if I wanted to," he replied. "And he's fine where he is."

"Where  _is_ he?" she pressed again, this time even more insistent.

"Away from anyone that he would use or harm. That's all you need to know."

She let out a cry as she hit the other side of the door in pure frustration. "That's not good enough."

"You have no right to know any more," he said calmly. "But if you're being bothered by him that badly, you can take solace in knowing that Dr. Strange and Illyana will be by soon enough to break whatever enchantment he has on you." He shook his head and backed away from the cell. "If you attempt to bother the children again, however ... you will not leave this place breathing."

He left, only to slow and give Logan — who had come down to see what was up — and Hank a little smirk. And for their part, they both looked like they approved wholeheartedly of his handling of Mystique.

"Does she need anything else said to her, or would it perhaps be kinder to simply drug her for the time being?" Hank asked. "Until Strange and Illyana get here, of course."

"If she's desperate enough that she's been slinking around the children…" Kurt shook his head. "I would feel better knowing she was knocked out until we get whatever spell my father has on her off of her."

"It's the big blue button on the left," Logan said as he tipped his chin up. "Mighta used it once or twice."

Kurt had to smirk the slightest bit. "And I'm sure there's no special reason you know that,  _mein Freund_."

"Nope," Logan replied easily as he kicked off from where he was leaning on Hank's desk. "No reason at all. Just know it shuts up stupid real quick."

Kurt nodded at his friend and stuck around only long enough to see that Mystique was, in fact, out before he put a hand on Logan's shoulder. "Shall we check in on the rest of the family? I think there are still desserts to be eaten."

"I'll bet they'd like an update," Logan agreed.

In a puff of smoke, Kurt had taken them both back upstairs, where half the adults had at least one kid getting their full attention and talking about the day's adventures — the scary wind, the blue lady, all of it being dramatically retold with varying vocabulary levels.

Kari looked much less scared than she had been before, curled up with Kate with her pink tail wrapped tightly around her mom's arm as Kate gently bounced her.

James and Elin were curled up on the couch with their mother, snuggled in and watching — and listening to the kids telling their tales. Neither of them had said a word, but Elin was very gently brushing James' hair out of his eyes as Logan made his way over to pick James up and check on his very quiet little ones.

Kurt of course went to Kari to kiss her forehead and make sure she was okay, though on seeing her dad, Krissy hopped down from Scott's lap — where she had been helpfully adding in details to Chance's retelling — to go tug on her father's pant leg until he picked her up, snuggling right into his neck.

As much as he was able, Kurt tried to give the best kid-friendly rundown of why Mystique was there that he could — though almost as soon as he'd explained it, Remy came simply strolling into the room with a woman none of them had met before: blonde and blue-eyed and wearing a coat that looked exactly like his.

"That's who I've been smelling," Logan muttered out low and K nodded along with him for a moment.

Remy tipped his head Logan's way before he smirked and looked at the group as a whole. "Everyone, dis here's Mistral. She de one took exception to Mystique climbin' in our window," he explained, the smirk only widening with every word — though Mistral, for her part, looked like she was ready to run at a moment's notice if the X-Men decided she was trouble.

Annie waved at Mistral with a kind sort of smile, and Scott didn't miss the way Remy had his arm draped over Mistral's shoulders, so he made sure to go around the room, giving codenames for those that had them.

"Yes, yes," Mistral said with a little smile. "I know ze X-Men. Everyone does."

"Looks like you know Gambit better than the rest of us, though," Bobby said just loud enough that she could hear it, smirking to himself.

"What were you doing here that you saw Mystique anyhow?" K asked, watching the girl closely.

"Observing," Mistral told her with a little wave, but on hearing it, Logan and K were falling into their quiet glares.

"We're just glad nothing too serious happened. Thanks for stepping in before she could do any harm," Scott said quickly, already seeing the look on Logan and K's face. "We're just breaking out Annie's pies and cupcakes if you want…" he said, steering them both toward the table.

"I would not intrude," Mistral said with a small frown, but that just got Remy to shake his head at her.

"You gon' have Miss Annie tinkin' you rude if you turn her down,  _cher_ ," he told her.

She raised a single eyebrow at that but allowed Remy to lead her with a quiet ' _merci_ ' as he grinned that much wider.

With the adults talking a bit more freely, Elin slipped from her mother's lap and headed off ahead of the crowd — only to return to Remy and Mistral a few moments later with a cupcake in each hand for them. She didn't say a word as she held them up to the adults with a little smirk on her face.

Remy was already chuckling as he took the cupcake and rested his hand on the top of her hair, though Mistral wasn't in on the joke and simply smiled as kindly as she could as she took hers. " _Merci_ , little one. Aren't you sweet?"

" _De rien,_ " Elin replied softly before she slipped back to where Chance was with the other kids, giggling wildly.

Mistral watched her skip off and absently moved to take a bite from the present, but Remy laughed, and that had her stopping in mid-motion. "What? What ees so funny?" she had to ask when he just kept on laughing.

It became more apparent what the story was, though, when Elin and the other kids all headed over to bring sweets to the other grown ups and Elin waited while her parents gave her a  _look._  But she didn't move until they at least kissed.

Mistral watched as Kate lightly decorated Kurt's nose with her fingertip full of frosting, and she glanced toward Remy with a look that was nearly unamused. "You 'ave done zis on purpose," she accused him.

"Believe it or not, dis ain't Gambit's fault," Remy said, still laughing and seemingly unable to stop.

"Then who taught these children to do such a thing?" she asked, clearly not believing him.

"Dey learnin' from all their parents," he pointed out, gesturing at some of the adults. Kate in particular was apparently on Elin's side and was more enthusiastic than usual about painting Kurt with icing, not that he was complaining. Remy broke into a cheeky grin as he added, "Why you tink dere so many little ones round here,  _petit_?"

The evidence was hard to argue with — particularly with half the adults already falling into what was now the usual cupcake-handling procedure and with the kids giggling wildly over their parents — though Scott was trying valiantly to maintain some semblance of professionalism despite both the twins and Cody whining at him that he wasn't playing right.

"But you have cupcake kisses  _all the time_ ," Chance whined, clearly unable to understand why now was any different than any other time Annie made cupcakes and fed their ridiculous games.

"Maybe later," Scott told Chance, who mightily and dramatically rolled his eyes to make it clear that 'later' was not an acceptable answer.

Mistral watched the interaction in almost disbelief before she just had to laugh. "And this ... this is ze team striking terror into the 'earts of villains everywhere," she said.

"Gotta have somthin' worth fightin' for," Remy replied with a wink.

Mistral smirked his way and shook her head at him before she set aside the cupcake she'd been given and leaned in to kiss him with a whispered, "I do not need ze help."

"Dat may be the case, but that lil' angel that handed it to you gon' be back to make sure you had enough sweets."

"You are encouraging and spoiling these little ..." She paused, trying to find the right word. "Little matchmakers."

"When de lil' matchmakers gon' grow up to have claws, you learn to get them on your side first," he teased.

"You may 'ave a point," she agreed with a thoughtful sort of smirk. She let out a long sigh as if it was an imposition before she plucked the cupcake back from the table and took a dainty bite, the frosting just barely touching her lips.

"You're doing it  _wrong_ ," Krissy said from the end of the table, her hands on her hips.

"I was not aware there was a  _wrong_ way to kiss," Mistral said, making her point by pressing a little kiss to Remy's cheek that left a very, very fine pink mark.

"You're s'posed to get it on your  _face_ so he can fix it."

Mistral laughed at the determined expression on Krissy's face. "You are helping your friend cause trouble," she accused the little elfling.

" _Ja_ ," Krissy agreed, nodding fervently. "Trouble  _all_ the time. So do it right!"

Logan and K were just chuckling at the little Elf's insistence. "Maybe you should have Sying help show her," K suggested.

Krissy's eyes widened, and she shook her head hard. "Nu-uh. No way."

"But then  _you're_ not doing it right," Logan teased.

Krissy seemed to consider this for a moment before she just scrunched up her whole face with determination. "CH-A-A-NCE," she bellowed, running over to the older boy. "Chance, I gotta borrow you for show-and-tellnin."

"Nuh-uh!" Chance called back. "I already  _got_ a Valnentime."

"It's just for  _shownin_ ," Krissy said.

"Then shownin with Sying!" he shot back. "Or Gerry!"

Krissy threw her whole head back and let out a groan of frustration. "I don't  _wanna_ shownin with Sying or Gerry. Sying is bossy, and Gerry is a Hawk-boy!"

"Hawks can kiss!" Chance said with a smile, as if he just realized it.

Krissy stuck her tongue out at him. "Nu-uh. Not  _each other_."

"Why not?" he asked with his nose scrunched up.

"Cause Momma say it's  _gross_."

Chance frowned and half hid behind Elin. "Don't wanna."

Krissy blew out all her breath and glared his way before she rolled her eyes and stormed over to where Sying was to half shove a cupcake into his cheek and give him a very quick kiss there. The whole thing took maybe a few seconds, and she spun on her heel to face Mistral and see if she had been paying attention — but Remy and Mistral had long ago gotten wrapped up in each other.

"You  _miss_ it!" Krissy looked totally betrayed and crushed.

But she didn't have much time to get upset as Logan came up behind her and picked her up to toss her in the air. "You got the job done, kiddo," he told her.

"I not doing it again," Krissy told him once he'd caught her, her arms crossed grumpily.

"You don't have to," Logan promised as he tickled her under the chin. "If they're too dumb to figure that out, they don't need you to show them."

"I guess so," she agreed. "I trynin to help Ellie, though."

"Elin is causin' enough trouble, don't you think?" he asked before he nuzzled her neck with a growl that went with the tickles.

She squealed with laughter, trying to fight him off, though when she did get a chance to breathe, the only thing she did was grin at him even wider and say, "Exactly!" as if that explained everything.

He let her climb up on his shoulders to carry her back to where all the fun was going down with the other kids. "Try not to kiss too many boys yet, alright? Your dad'll turn pure white if you do."

"Boys are bossy," Krissy told him fervently.

"You don't wanna play with bossy boys," he agreed as he set her down.

"Well, you can play with them if they stop being bossy," she allowed. "But  _no-o-o-o-o_ kissing."

"Keep to that plan, sweetheart," he told her before he picked up James and tossed him in the air to give him the same treatment on the way back to K.

* * *

After Thanksgiving dinner was over, everyone invited helped with the cleanup and profusely congratulated Annie on another spectacular job before they started to go their separate ways. K had relaxed substantially after Lisbet and Wade left, and Remy was  _more_ than happy to offer to drive Mistral home, though they all knew that was just an excuse for him to get another goodbye kiss that he knew for sure wasn't just because there was a small army of kids encouraging all kinds of sweets.

But the day wasn't quite over yet. The Summers twins started to chant their excitement over putting up Christmas decorations now that Thanksgiving was over. Christmas was by far their favorite holiday, especially because it was so close to their birthdays, and while the X-Men didn't decorate the  _entire_ house on Thanksgiving night, they did at least humor the twins and put up the tree.

Kurt had his hands full of requests from the little ones to take them up on the ceiling so that they could place ornaments up high on the tree, while Scott also made it a point to pick up any kids that Kurt didn't have and put them on his shoulders. The twins took turns directing everyone on where to put their ornaments, and Charlie stood in front of the tree with her hands up in a square and one eye closed in her best serious expression to call out directions.

Cody was of course no help to his big brother and sister as he got hold of a few of the round, plastic ornaments and just started to giggle delightedly. "Ball!" he declared, rolling the red, round ornament across the floor and absolutely  _refusing_ to let anyone hang it.

"No — for the tree," Charlie tried to explain to him, but he simply giggled at her and continued on in his contented play with his 'ball,' and she let out a long sigh and looked over at Elin. "Little brothers," she sighed out in annoyance, and Elin giggled at her for it.

"It's okay. He's still little," Chance assured Charlie, scrambling to be let down from Scott's shoulders so that he could sit down with Cody.

"Ball," Cody told him seriously, and Chance nodded along.

"Uh-huh. Yep. That's round and red just like a ball, good job," Chance said in his most encouraging voice.

Cody beamed and rolled the ornament Chance's way, and when Chance rolled it back to him, he started laughing hysterically.

Chance glanced up at Scott, who was just watching the whole thing with a huge grin on his face, and shrugged. "He's still little," he said as he went back to rolling the 'ball' with his baby brother.

"Oh, and Peter's with his aunt for the holidays," Annie said in a voice filled with disappointment.

But just then, one of the little bamfs teleported over to her, a cheeky grin on his face as he tapped her on the shoulder and showed her Kate's phone, which he had been using to take pictures of the two little Summers boys. "Bamf," said the little guy, and Annie laughed and ruffled his hair.

"Oh, you're just trouble," she told him affectionately, and he giggled and put his 1920s reporter hat back on as he went around looking for more things to document.

And there certainly were plenty of things for the little guy to choose from. There was, for example, the fact that Magda had climbed into Erik's lap and refused to climb back down, grinning delightedly as he used his powers to hook the ornaments and hang them from afar.

"Higher, grandpapa," she giggled, and Erik beamed with delight as he did just that.

"Where should we put one next?" he asked, and Magda pursed out her lower lip as she thought about it.

"On the bottom," she decided with a little nod. "There's no as many there cuz all the kids want to go up high."

"The bottom it is," Erik agreed, threading the hook through the ornament as Magda giggled delightedly.

The little photographer bamf giggled as he captured the perfectly melting expression on Erik's face before he teleported over to the ceiling. Kurt had Kari up there with him, using his tail to lower her where she wanted to go relative to the tree — but both Krissy and Sying were up on the ceiling with him, giggling and clamoring for their turn next. Noh had gone downstairs with Forge to look over the security system to find out how both Mistral and Mystique had breached them in the first place, so they only had one wall-crawling father to pester between all of them.

"My turn," Kari sang out to them, drawing her shoulders up importantly, though the look was married by the fact that she was hanging upside down, and all her hair fell in front of her face when she tried to turn to give Krissy and Sying a properly triumphant look.

"Your turn is taking  _forever_ ," Krissy complained loudly.

"My-y-y-y turn," Kari insisted even louder.

"Kari," Kate called up from the ground level, a mug of hot chocolate in her hand and a stern expression on her face. "You've been taking your turn for a long time. It's Krissy's turn."

Kari pouted dramatically. "My-y-y-y turn," she insisted.

Kate kept up her stern look until Kari sighed and placed her ornament — and Kurt was able to set her down on the ceiling again, though she just crouched there and pouted for a while as Kate shook her head.

"Those are your genes," she told Kurt.

"Yes, of course," Kurt said with a little chuckle, though the ever-helpful Sying wrinkled his nose at both of them.

"No," he broke in, very slowly, like he was weighing out the argument he wanted to make. "Mommy says babies need a mommy  _and_ daddy."

Kurt and Kate both glanced at each other for that one, though Kurt broke into a little chuckle and had to ruffle Sying's long white hair. "Your mother is completely right," he agreed, and Sying nodded triumphantly.

"I thought so," he said, then crooked one little finger to get Kurt to bend down closer to him. "That's how come I don't have a little sister yet. Mommy gets all funny when I ask her."

Neither Kurt nor Kate was quite able to hide the smile at that one as Kurt diplomatically nodded. "You are a very smart young man," he told Sying.

"That's what Mommy says too," he agreed happily.

Krissy watched the entire interaction somewhat warily, not sure what Sying was on about, but once it seemed like there was a lull in the conversation, she pulled on her dad's shirt. "Papa, my turn. My turn."

"Of course,  _Prinzessin_ ," he said with a little smile as he lowered her down to the tree.

And, of course, the little photographer bamf caught the entire thing.

By that time, the tree had been more or less decorated, and all the kids finally came down from ceilings and shoulders to admire their good work, giggling delightedly to themselves the whole time.

Chance and Charlie had just declared the whole thing 'perfect' when Scott spotted James running right toward him, and he scooped up the little guy to get him to break into delighted belly laughs. "What's your hurry, little man?" he teased as James just kept laughing.

But as soon as James had calmed down from all the laughing, he more or less latched onto Scott shirt and turned his attention curiously to the tree, pointing with one finger at the nearest ornament. "What's that?"

Scott readjusted his grip on James so the little boy wouldn't fall over trying to point at the ornament, though James did insist on getting close enough that he could put one little finger on the round, red ornament so that Scott couldn't possibly mistake which one he was pointing at. "That one's red, buddy," Scott told him.

James nodded seriously, clearly thinking it over before he leaned  _way_ far over, and Scott moved with him so the little guy could point at the next one. "What's that?"

"Green."

"What's that?"

"Gold."

"What's that?"

"Red."

After every single answer, James would fall apart in little laughs, which turned into belly laughs any time he was able to steer Scott around the Christmas tree by practically falling out of his godfather's arms trying to reach the next ornament.

They went around and around the Christmas tree like that, with James trying to touch every single ornament so he could ask Scott what color it was, falling apart in belly laughs once it was clear that they'd already been around the tree twice and he wasn't about to let up anytime soon.

"What's  _that_?" James asked, barely getting it out before he dissolved into laughter once more as Scott shook his head.

"That's red, buddy," he said, his tone patient even if it was clear he was getting tired of going around and around the Christmas tree. Not, of course, of spending time with James - that much was obvious from the huge grin on his face, even if it was a repetitive game.

"I'm just happy you can even  _play_ this game," K said quietly. "He'd have to correct you if you got one wrong wearing the ruby quartz."

Scott shot a grin K's way and had to nod his agreement. It  _was_ nice to be able to see colors again.

As Scott made his third pass around the Christmas tree, though, Kurt stepped in to try to rescue him. He dropped from the ceiling in front of Scott and James and smiled at the little boy. "Why don't you play with me for a while?" he offered, already holding his arms out to take James.

But the little boy just wasn't having it. He shook his head vehemently and even put his little hand right in Kurt's face. " _No_ , Elf," he said with such a tone of finality that Kurt had to laugh.

"Well, alright," Kurt said, shaking his head and laughing even more when James turned right around and snuggled Scott hard, melting into him in a hug and kissing his cheek just so it was absolutely clear who his first pick was for silly Christmas ornament games.

"Sorry, Scott. The baby has spoken," Kate teased.

But Scott shook his head, grinning down at the little boy in his arms. "I really don't mind," he promised.

"Careful, Annie, that look's trouble," Kate said, turning her teasing toward the other Summers, since clearly, Scott was too content with the little baby Howlett to be bothered by her jabs.

"Don't I know it," Annie said with a little smile, though she seemed completely unbothered, playing with Cody and Chance while the two boys were still rolling around one of the ornaments.

"I'm just saying: watch out," Kate said.

"Honey, we've got three little troublemakers already. Scott can play with James all he wants if he ever gets the urge," Annie said easily, clearly not worried at all. She glanced up at Kate with a little troublemaking smile of her own. "Now you, on the other hand, only have two."

" _And_ they're Catholic," Jubilee called out helpfully, cackling when Kate shot her a look.

"Oh no —  _you_ of all people don't get to tease about this," Kate said, leveling her finger at Jubilee. "Not when poor Sying is just  _pining_ for a little sister."

"She has a point, honey," Annie laughed, and Jubilee stuck her tongue out at both of them.

"Glass houses, Jubes," Kate giggled.

Jubilee huffed at her, hands on her hips, before she tossed her hair over her shoulder in a clear sign that she was done with both of them.

"C'mon, Jubes," Kate said, this time a little more consolingly. "I could give you the name of the adoption agency Billy and Teddy are using. You don't  _have_ to have a half-Kree. Sying wouldn't care as long as he got to be a big brother."

"And my sister has adopted two of her own. She knows her way around the system," Annie agreed.

Thankfully for Jubilee, right about that time, Noh had reemerged from his tinkering with Forge, and she skipped over to Noh with a dramatic look of annoyance. "Come on, cutie," she told Noh, who grinned at being addressed that way. "Let's blow this popsicle stand."

Annie and Kate caught each other's gazes and both hid smiles as Noh, not really knowing what was going on but never one to miss a chance to sweep Jubilee off her feet, picked her up to carry her off.

"Those two…" Annie trailed off and shook her head.

"I know. They're ridiculous," Kate agreed.

"They're darling," Annie corrected her.

"Yep. The whole family."

By that time, the kids were starting to slow down, and even James' belly laughs were getting a little more tired. Not that he was going to let up on his game with Scott any time soon; he was just slowing down. But it was as good an indication as any as to how tired the kids were getting, and that meant it was time to start breaking up the party and sending kids to bed — though Kurt, Logan, and a few others stayed down in the living room to wait for Strange and Ilyanna to arrive to take care of the Mystique problem they still had.

* * *

When Strange and Ilyanna arrived some time later, the mansion was the quietest it had been all day. Most of the kids were asleep or on their way out — and half their parents were asleep as well, zonked out from all the excitement of the day and trying to keep up with both kids and normal superhero nonsense.

The two magic-makers kept as quiet as possible so as not to disturb the peace settling over the whole mansion as they followed Hank down to where the X-Men had locked Mystique away, and Kurt quickly filled them both in on the day's events — as well as what Mystique had told him when she pulled him aside during his lunch with Kamala and Miles.

"I'm sure he's done something to her, but I don't know what it is," Kurt finished, gesturing to the cell where Mystique was still unconscious. "And it's finally reached the point where if we don't deal with it…" He let out a breath and let the sentence hang in the air, clearly just… annoyed with his family.

"I will see what we can do," Strange promised Kurt, already nodding. "It shouldn't be too hard to find out what the spell  _is_ , at any rate. Breaking it — or perhaps bending it — will just take a bit more time. Your father is partial to blood magic, and that is vexingly difficult to deal with."

"Yes," Kurt said with a sigh. "I'm aware."

Strange gave Kurt a look a sympathy for just a moment before he set to work, his eyes narrowed as the air around him seemed to grow colder the more he probed into the spell. But as he did so, his look of concentration seemed to grow more and more into one of annoyance.

Finally, he looked Kurt's way and readjusted the cape around his shoulders as he thought over his options. "This spell is years old," Strange told him. "Which makes its hold on her stronger."

"But you can break it?" Kurt prompted.

"Of course," Strange said, sounding almost insulted before he turned back toward the door between them and Mystique. "It will just take me longer than I anticipated. I'd suggest you all make yourselves comfortable."

"This will give us a chance to catch up anyway," Ilyanna told Kurt and Hank with a little grin as she followed both of them back to seats in Hank's lab.

The three friends chatted easily, catching up on each other's lives — though part of the way through Ilyanna's grinning recollection of the fact that Billy was so excited about the upcoming adoption that Strange was actually trying to  _avoid_ him whenever he brought out his phone to show off the same pictures for the thirty-ninth time, Strange asked Ilyanna to join him for the spell, and she shook her head, sure to kiss both Hank and Kurt on the cheek before she left.

It was another twenty minutes of waiting before both magic-makers emerged again, though both of them looked satisfied as they did so.

"Mystique should no longer be feeling the effects of that particular spell," Strange told Kurt, who looked relieved to hear it. "She won't be drawn to Azazel any longer — but just to be sure, I asked Ilyanna to aid me in a second spell."

"Oh?" Kurt asked, one eyebrow raised.

Ilyanna nodded, smiling softly at Kurt. "I remember what you told me about that horrible timeline you and Kate visited," she said. "And it seemed to both of us that the best thing to do? Is keep  _both_ of your parents away from your kids."

"It's a variation of the spell we placed on your father," Strange explained. "Far more powerful, because Mystique does not have the ability to simply appear at important intervals in your family's life." He smirked slightly and nodded to himself. "Should she come within sight of any member of your family, she will find herself unable to resist the urge to remove herself from the premises immediately."

"And if she doesn't leave, we gave her the same treatment as Azazel — frozen to the spot the second she touches any of them," Ilyanna promised. "She's not getting anywhere near your kids. Ever."

Kurt's relief showed in the way his shoulders — and his entire body — relaxed before he rushed over to wrap Ilyanna in a hug and then shake Strange's hand. "Thank you. For the peace of mind," he said warmly.

"Anytime," Strange said with a smile of his own.


	12. A Gathering of Grief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which this chapter hurts.

 

It was about a week before Christmas when Kate and Kurt returned from their usual anniversary trip, completely wrapped up in each other as usual.

When they did return, it wasn't to anywhere public but to their own bedroom, in the middle of a long and lingering kiss that pulled on Kate's lip when they broke apart for a breath. Neither of them were quite ready to come home, but they knew if they didn't at least  _arrive_ at the mansion, they might never leave.

Kate didn't release her grip on Kurt even after the kiss broke, her arms around his neck and his around her waist, his tail tangled around one of her legs. "We should have locked up your parents ages ago," she teased. "You haven't been this relaxed in years."

"You certainly help me to relax,  _Vögelchen_ ," he teased right back before he stole another long, lingering, passionate kiss. "Don't discount your contributions here."

She was already slipping her hands up into his curls as she kissed him back. "Oh, never."

They were just starting to get really involved — again — when there was a little cough, drawing both of their attention.

Neither of them had been expecting to see the tall, thin, dark-haired Asgardian standing in their room, leaned casually against the dresser as if he had simply been waiting there for ages. And while Kurt immediately tensed on seeing Loki, of all people, in their bedroom, Kate was only wary, frowning at him for a long moment.

"What are you doing here?" she asked him, since he didn't seem to be exactly  _up_ to anything, though she knew that was impossible with her old teammate.

"It's nice to see you too, Kate," Loki said with one eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, hello, long time no see — what're you doing here?" Kate said, matching his raised-eyebrow expression with one of her own and a clear tone that said she wasn't about to be deterred.

Loki sighed, clearly put out that he wasn't getting a better hello, but he shrugged with the palms of both hands turned outward all the same. "Your friends needs you," he said simply, but before Kate or Kurt could ask for any further clarification, they heard Loki mutter an Asgardian word that Kate recognize but Kurt didn't — and a moment later, they were in Billy and Teddy's apartment, with no sign of the green-clad Asgardian.

But any questions or complaints they might have had at being so suddenly transported quickly died when they saw the state that Billy and Teddy were both in.

Kate and Kurt weren't the first to have been brought to the scene. Most of Kate's friends had already arrived, and Teddy was halfway melted into America's shoulder, his own shoulders shaking with emotion, while America looked unusually upset. Both Tommy and Cassie were halfway wrapped around Billy, who was an absolute puddle.

The two newcomers were there in an instant, concern etched all over their expressions. They had no idea what was wrong or how they could help — but they would certainly try.

"What happened?" Kurt asked Cassie gently, and the young blonde pulled herself away from Billy for a moment to fill them in — though the moment she opened her mouth to explain the situation, that same Asgardian word echoed around them, and Jubilee and Noh arrived as well.

"Loki?" Noh asked Kate as Jubilee clapped a hand over her mouth on seeing the boys so upset.

"Loki," Kate said with a little nod, then tipped her head to Cassie as a signal for her to go on with the explanation.

Cassie took a deep breath and glanced over at Billy and Teddy before she pulled them all to the far corner. "They just heard from the birth mother they were going to adopt from," she explained in a low tone, and already, the four listeners were visibly wilting. They could guess what the problem was already.

"She said all that time with her family at the holidays… it's got her rethinking her decision," Cassie explained, still in that same low tone. "So… she's decided to keep the baby."

Kate glanced over to where Billy and Teddy were a wreck, and she felt her heart shatter on their behalf. They had been hoping so hard ... they'd filled out all the paperwork, done everything right. And to have it all ripped out from underneath them when they were  _this_ close…

And it would make sense that Loki would be keeping an eye out for this, too. Besides being a quietly good friend to the Young Avengers on occasion, adoptive families were a cause dear to him...

Kate rushed over to wrap both of her friends up in the warmest hug that she could manage. She knew that nothing she said would be able to take away the hurt, so she didn't try to say anything. Instead, she just pulled them tighter and shushed Billy when he apologized for getting her shirt wet.

Loki's spell echoed the room a few more times after that. Tammy and Tyler; Annie and Scott; Natasha and Clint; Miles and Kamala. Even Tony and Pepper came, though they hadn't come by way of the magic express. Pepper had heard on her own and insisted on coming, and between her and Annie, they quickly had made arrangements for food and for transportation to get Billy and Teddy out of the house if they didn't want to be alone.

Tony and Kate had already both promised to make up for any money they'd lost in paying the fees to the adoption agency so far, and even though Billy and Teddy insisted they didn't need the help, Tony went right ahead and pulled some funds so that they could go international with their next attempt if they wanted — because Natasha had a few places that she promised could use loving parents like the two of them.

And as for everyone else ... there was plenty of hugging and comforting. Because as much as it was nice to have people around to plan ahead, what the two of them  _really_ needed, at that moment, was a sympathetic ear and a shoulder so that they could both just … soak in the unfairness of it all.

"When did you find out?" Kamala asked Teddy at last.

"About five minutes before Tommy showed up," Teddy replied, glancing at Tommy, who shrugged openly.

"Hey, all I know is I got magicked here. If I'd have known sooner, I'd have been here faster than any stupid spell," he said, both hands held up.

"Wonder why he didn't stay," Teddy mused, starting to sit up a little straighter and try to get a better handle on himself.

"Like he ever stays," Kate said, rolling her eyes.

"Good point," Teddy said with a little smirk before he reached over to steal Billy from where he was still half leaning on Cassie for support and to wrap his arms around his husband.

"It's just… not fair," Billy whispered to Teddy, and as Teddy patted Billy's hair and shushed him, the assembled Avengers and X-Men just had to agree. Seeing them this crushed…

"You would be amazing parents," Kamala told them both, very sincerely, a tremor in her voice. She had been crying almost as hard as they had — though that might have been the hormones as well.

"We  _will_ be," Teddy corrected her gently.

"That's right you will," Tommy agreed fervently. "And they'll be the best niece or nephew of all time."

"Just look at the way you are with our little ones," Kurt said gently. "They absolutely adore both of you. I have no doubt it will be the same with your own."

Billy let out a little breath at that. "I know," he muttered, almost bitterly. "But knowing that is not the  _same_ as actually getting to have it."

Kurt's expression softened even more, and he put a hand on Billy's shoulder. "I know," he said, still in that same gentle tone, and Billy closed his eyes as he tried not to turn into a puddle again.

Billy leaned into Teddy with a barely restrained sigh. The truth of the matter was simply that their friends didn't know. They didn't know what it was like to want kids so badly and to watch all their friends have exactly what they had been hoping for — and in many cases on  _accident_.

The girl with a demon for a father-in-law had a kid before they did, for crying out loud. She had two. And while she was also Billy's best friend, there was a part of him, a very selfish part, that was just so tired of it.

They had families, and his stayed stagnant. He loved Teddy — of course he did — but years of saving, of paperwork, of waiting to be matched … all of it was lost in an instant. So he felt like he was justified in a little selfishness. He could hardly even look Kamala in the eye, and the rest of them… the nasty, jealous part of him could only look and see the families they had and  _could_ have.

That image was sticking in his mind more than anything else, and there was nothing that he could do to soften it. So yes, while he was grateful that they were there, while he was grateful to have so much support from his friends… he really just wanted them to leave. To go back to their  _families_ and leave him to his.

Slowly, everyone did, in fact, leave — though not until after Tommy made it clear that Billy and Teddy would be expected at the mansion to join their cousin, aunt and uncle, and grandfather. "You know — after you say hi to your mom and dad," Tommy said. "Grandfather was really hoping you two would come by."

That, more than anything else that had happened so far, got Billy to smile. Tommy had never been really big on the family thing. It had taken him forever to accept the fact that Billy was his twin brother, even with the obvious resemblance. So to hear him talking about family get-togethers and talking about Magneto with obvious fondness… Billy couldn't help but smile at that. It meant his brother was happy — how could he  _not_ smile at that?

"Yeah, okay," Billy promised. "We'll be there."

"Good." Tommy grinned and wrapped his brother up. "It's not a party without you guys around, you know."

"Yeah, yeah, don't lay it on too thick. You're no good at it," Billy teased.

"Got you to smile, though," Tommy pointed out.

Teddy had to smirk at that as he wrapped an arm around Billy's shoulders. "He's got you there," he said, which just had Billy making a face at him.

"Just…" Billy sighed and shook his head, knowing it was pointless to argue with Tommy. "See you at Christmas."

"See you then," Teddy agreed. "And stay for a while; we're doing a Hannukah thing with Grandfather and Kitty and Star Lord and Spiderman…"

"I'll be there," Billy promised.

Tommy grinned, and with that, he was the last to leave Billy and Teddy's apartment.

* * *

Teddy somehow wasn't surprised to see Loki out in the hallway after everyone was gone, his arms crossed and one leg propped against the wall, looking as casual as it was possible for an Asgardian who had just magicked all their friends there to be.

"Thanks," Teddy said, his own arms crossed as he leaned against the wall with his shoulder.

For a moment, Loki looked like he might try to deny any involvement — but then he thought better of it. "If you decide to look into it," he said instead, "there are spells…"

"Yeah, we thought we'd try this way first," Teddy said, holding up one hand. "No offense."

"Absolutely none taken," Loki said. "I've been a mother before. I know how it can be. Anticipation is itself a terrible torture."

Teddy nodded quietly at that. He wasn't entirely sure how to respond, if he was honest. He was still shaken himself.

"Mind you, my charity has its limits," Loki continued, without even looking Teddy's way — though he was wearing a quiet smirk. "If you find yourself yearning for an Asgardian, for example, I'm not so willing to go through another pregnancy without massive compensation."

Teddy blinked at Loki for a moment before he let out an honest laugh. "We'll keep that in mind," he said, unable to hide his grin. He'd really needed that.

Loki smirked before he kicked off from the wall. "I'm sure I'll be in touch," he said before he simply disappeared in a flash of light.

* * *

When Christmas did come around, Billy and Teddy, of course, showed up, true to their word, with presents for friends and family floating behind them thanks to a handy little spell of Billy's.

It was almost overwhelming for the two of them when they were greeted by hugs all around, as word had long ago spread about what had happened, and everyone in the mansion wanted to express their condolences and hopes that next time would be a little better.

It was honestly hard, since the hurt was still so new. They knew that everyone there meant well, of course, but so many people rushing them at once, repeating the same things over and over — it was a little draining.

 _Hey,_ Rachel Summers called out telepathically when Billy found himself very nearly upset when Kitty hugged him with her barely-a-month-old little star prince in her arms.  _If you need an escape, just think it really, really hard._

Billy glanced over to where Rachel was sitting with her little brothers and sister and managed a weak little smile her way.  _Thanks_.

 _I can hear you from here,_ Rachel replied.

_Sorry._

_Don't be_. Rachel shook her head the slightest bit so that he could see it even from the doorway.  _If I was hurting that badly, I'd be doing the same thing._

_Yeah, but you shouldn't have to listen to it._

Rachel's telepathic voice rang with laughter.  _Hazards of the job, Wiccan. But seriously. If you need an out, I am not above telling your brother to kidnap you somewhere. Maybe you can run that stupid program of Kate's. It always cheers everyone right up._

Billy had to smile at that.  _She's ridiculous._

_Yeah, she really is._

But the truth was ... now that Rachel had given them an out, it was a little easier to get through everyone. It was totally a mental thing, but just the knowledge that they  _could_ leave if they wanted meant a lot. And besides, it was just that first initial mob that was hard. Everything after that was a whole lot of presents and laughter, especially at some of the littlest X-Men, who were far more interested in the shiny wrapping paper than  _any_ of the actual gifts.

As was quickly becoming tradition, Charlie and Chance ran the whole thing, divvying out presents so that everyone could unwrap them under the direction of the two Summerses. The pair of them were trying to catch up to Gerry in reading, too, so they very carefully sounded out everyone's name on the gift tags — those that were legible, anyway.

Teddy was the one to notice the little beaded bracelet that Chance was wearing, and he leaned over to Jubilee. "Let me guess," he said with a little smile. "That's from Elin?"

Jubilee giggled with delight and nodded. "They've been doing that every year," she explained. "Chance  _insists_ on giving Elin his present before they do anything else."

"So what did Elin get?" Teddy asked curiously.

In response, Jubilee just gestured over at the little girl, who had a little card clenched in one small fist. It was clearly hand-drawn, with painstaking letters, and Teddy had to grin.

"Those two are too cute for words," he whispered to Jubilee.

"I know, right?" She giggled. "You should see Logan and Scott's faces every time it happens, too. I think they thought they'd have grown out of it by now."

"I almost hope they never do," Teddy told her.

"Almost?" Jubilee arched an eyebrow at him.

Teddy had to laugh. "Well, you never know who they're going to fall for in the end. I didn't even meet Billy until I was, like, fifteen."

"True," Jubilee said, nodding along. "But they are so …." She gestured to where Logan and K were half wrapped up and clearly snuggling and then to Scott and Annie were leaning their heads together side by side "...so much like their parents."

"Both parents, both sets," Teddy said. "I still maintain that Charlie's more like her dad than Chance is, though."

"That's only because you don't know the  _real_ Scott Summers," she countered before she gave him a little squeeze. "He's a snuggle puss. Just like Chance."

Teddy laughed at that. "If you say so. I guess you'd know better, since you're on the team."

"I've known him since I was thirteen," Jubilee replied with a laugh. "Yeah. I'd know."

Teddy just grinned at her before he slipped off to find Billy — and some hot chocolate.

The rest of the day went off more or less without a hitch, with the tiniest X-Men playing outside with Bobby building snowmen and having snowball fights, as was traditional. Which, of course, meant that all the kids, the bamfs, and Bobby were ready for bed by the time Annie called them all in for the huge Christmas dinner.

Sying, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, climbed up into Billy's lap and nestled his face into Billy's shirt, rubbing his nose into his chest. When he had rubbed his whole face into Billy a few times, he settled in with a tired explanation of, "Grammy K says that's how you get glitter, and you need lots of it."

"He's not wrong," K told Billy before she grabbed the little Wiccan by both sides of his face and kissed both cheeks. "And it can't hurt, right?"

Billy smiled at her and shook his head. "I guess every little bit counts," he said as Sying made himself comfortable and seemed to be all set to drift off right there in Billy's lap.

"I sure does," she agreed before Elin made her way over, rubbing her eyes, before she held her arms up to Billy.

"Love you," she said when he picked her up and she gave him a bear hug.

Billy looked like he was about to just keel over, so Teddy reached across him and scooped up the little girl for a hug too when Billy let go. "Me too?" he teased.

"Yep," she said before she gave him a smile and then the same treatment — in time for James and Kari to get to Billy and each hug him around the knees.

"Night," James said with a yawn.

"G'night," Billy said in a strained voice, though he couldn't stop the smile at the tiny invasion, especially when he noticed that Kari had her tail wrapped around his ankle as part of the hug.

Both of the boys were treated to hugs and kisses from not only every single one of the kids but all of the ladies on their way to take the kids to bed, and by the time they were through, Billy looked like he was going to fall over, and Teddy was unable to stop shaking his head at the whole situation.

"They all planned that, didn't they?" he accused Tommy, who was one of the few left after everyone with little ones had gone upstairs.

"They jus' like dat," Remy said with a little chuckle from his spot near the fireplace. "We call Elin de Emotional Assassin. She stone cold, too. Gets it from her mama."

"And the elflings just like to hug," Cassie said with a little grin. "They'll hug  _anyone_. Kari especially. Krissy must like you, though — she doesn't like to hug  _boys._ "

"She'll grow out of that fast," Teddy laughed.

"Hopefully not too fast, or Kurt might keel over," Cassie said, still grinning.

"Yeah, he gon' be outta luck on dat one," Remy said with a laugh.

"Well, as long as she keeps on believing in cooties," Billy said with a little smile, shaking his head as he got to his feet.

"You've seen her parents. That's just not gonna happen," Teddy chuckled, taking the hand Billy offered him to get to his feet as well. "We're headed home," he told the remaining X-Men. "Got a few presents to unwrap just the two of us."

"Before you go, I'd like a word," Erik said in a weary tone.

Billy and Teddy glanced at each other before they both nodded in unison. "Sure," Billy said, and both followed Erik out into the hallway.

"I know that I haven't been as … available as I should have been all these years," Erik said once they were in a much more private setting. "But I wanted to tell you — so you heard it from me — that I'm very proud of what the two of you are trying to do." He gave them a warm smile and rested a hand on each of their shoulders. "But also I thought it wise to make sure that you knew that family is what you make of it, and in spite of how you must be feeling right now ... you do have family here. Far more than the little bit of blood that you share with me." He chuckled slightly and took a few steps to the door. "As if little Elin hadn't made that point already."

For a moment, both of the boys looked simply stunned — touched, but surprised — before Billy ran to close the few steps between them and wrap Erik in a wordless hug, with Teddy over his shoulder beaming at the two of them as he mouthed out a silent 'thanks' Erik's way.

Erik returned the hug, one hand on the back of Billy's head, a bit too choked up to respond more than to just nod his head and give him a squeeze.

When Billy finally let go, wiping at his eyes, he managed to mutter out a little, "We'll, um, we'll let you know when we can get another application started, okay?" When Erik started to nod, Billy just did the same, and Teddy had to hide behind one hand as he could finally start to see the family resemblance between Billy and Erik.

"C'mon, Billy. I'll fly," Teddy said, taking his husband by the arm as they finally headed out. "Merry Christmas!" he called over his shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, those of you that know anything about mags' issues (five years infertility, two doctors, one failed adoption, and a miscarriage) know this chapter? Was a rough one to write.


	13. Too Sexy For My House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which that last chapter was way too sad, so HERE HAVE A HAPPIER ONE. STAT.

 

With how many families were settling into the mansion, it seemed crowded even around the holidays, but when the students all came back from breaks, it was just that much moreso. Half of them were buzzing with news about what they'd been up to over the break, and the other half were speculating on the primaries in a few weeks. Senator Cleary, who had fought alongside Scott and Storm back when they were trying to defeat the tracking bill, was on the ballot, and the kids who were old enough to remember all that had gone down were excited about it — especially those that were old enough to vote.

And of course, there were the kids like Leslie Ann and Jana, who were thrilled at the prospect of another semester with a new training schedule with the junior squad. Already a few weeks in, they were practically plotting how best to take over the team for themselves; the two of them were trouble together.

Logan was in a particularly good mood and had left K in bed — though the little ones had elected to join him at breakfast early to give K a little break from the wildness that feeding James could be on any given day. Even though he was getting bigger, he was still a handful — only because he thought it was hilarious, though, and he didn't push nearly as hard with Logan on troublemaking than when K and Kate gave him breakfast. Mostly because they would play along with him.

Of course, K had just given Logan a dirty look the week before when he woke her up with a smile that she dubbed 'entirely too smug' before she pushed him out of bed. It would be at least a month before she'd let the rest of the mansion in on their little secret — a third tiny heartbreaker to add to their little family — but Logan had been enjoying himself just pouring on the attention to her, particularly when they were alone, positively tickled with how it was coming together.

He was watching over the top of his paper as James ate his eggs and played with his toast when Jubilee came bopping over and landed a little kiss on both of their temples. And when she'd turned from James to go to the kitchen, Logan had to stop and simply… watch her go, the minute scent shift something that was unmistakable and completely unexpected. Especially considering her stance on half-Kree number two. He watched her for a moment with the tiniest of frowns until she turned back to smile his way, and he was quick to just go back to his paper, intent on ignoring the scent that seemed a helluva lot thicker than it  _should_ have been.

He put it out of his mind as, almost as soon as James and Elin were finished with their breakfasts, Annie and Scott came in with their little crowd. Chance rushed over to hug Elin in their regular morning greeting, and she stayed at the table to keep him company for breakfast. Logan was trying to get James together to head out when Annie came over and took over.

"I've got him," she said with a warm smile, and Logan found himself tipping his head a bit to the side with a little frown that Annie misread entirely. "It's fine, really! I have time before class to read to the little ones anyhow."

Logan shook his head lightly. "That's not..." He drew in a little breath and frowned deeper for a moment. "Alright. Thanks." He pushed back from the table and ruffled James' hair as he made a quick exit from the kitchen. He was probably just wrapped up in that scent wrapped around K… he rubbed his nose with the back of his hand hard, snuffling a bit to try and clear his head. There was no way all three of them were having babies at once. That was just … no.

He made his way up to his class and more or less got the whole subject of babies out of his mind as the lecture of the day had taken the kids through the beginnings of World War Two — for all the deep dark, bloody bits that got the United States involved. So when he left the class to head back to check on how K was feeling and he nearly ran into Kate …

"Watch where you're goin', Hawkeye," he said, and he was ready to add a little snark when he just … stopped.

"What — you break a hip, old man?" she teased him right back.

"Must have," he replied with a little frown as he gave her a clear once over. "Or something."

She tipped her head to the side. "What?"

Logan shook his head and side-stepped her, waving her off with one hand. "Nothin'."

She shook her head and stuck her tongue out. "What — the purple highlights too much? Kurt likes 'em."

"Good for him," Logan called over his shoulder. "Smells awful." He made a beeline to his room and scooped up K to carry her over and snuggle up with her as she gave him a clear look of questioning.

"Okay. Who broke you?" she asked, but he simply chuckled and kissed her back into the pillows to reorient himself.

"You would not believe the crazy going on out there right now," he told her with a smirk. "Something is definitely  _wrong_."

* * *

But while Logan had gone to K, Kate had gone to Kurt, a little frown on her face as she caught him at the end of his drama class. He grinned when he saw her leaned against the doorway then teleported over to wrap her in a kiss, though when he saw the slight frown, he tipped his head to the side. " _Was is los_?"

"Logan's being weird," Kate said, her lips pursed together. "I don't know ... he said my hair smelled awful, but this is  _not_ the first time I've used this dye."

Kurt frowned and shook his head. "That doesn't sound right. I'm sure he'd have told you before if it smelled that bad."

"So something else, then," Kate said.

"Where was he going?" Kurt asked.

"Looked like he was headed back to his room," Kate said. "Probably hiding out. Grumpy grampa today."

Kurt raised one shoulder to his ear. "Could be," he said thoughtfully. "It does seem like the two of them have spent a lot of time hiding, though, doesn't it?"

Kate nodded. "We could always send Krissy to make them come play," she teased. "Or Sying. Can't send Chance, or he'll get stuck in there forever."

"Or ... we could just let them have a bit of privacy," Kurt replied.

"Where's your private eye spirit?" she laughed.

"It just makes me wonder if they're alright with all the political talk going on," Kurt said. "And an election year to boot …"

"Ah." Kate nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah, that would be… I dunno. Maybe. It's just no fun when the hug magnet isn't his usual grumpy-but-loveable self."

"What's to say he's not going for  _more_ hugs?" Kurt asked with a growing smile. "Just ... one of three targets."

Kate had to laugh at that. "True. And adorable kiddie hugs  _are_ the best kind on him. He collects them."

"It makes me wonder if that's all he's collecting," Kurt said airily.

Kate chuckled at that and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Jealous?" she teased. "Do you need more attention, oh dramatic Elf of mine?"

"Always," he replied with a grin, which just got her to wrap him up in a deep kiss that elicited a few whistles from the students in the halls.

* * *

Meanwhile, Tyler had been having a strange morning himself. It had started out with what he thought was  _great_ news when he woke up next to Tammy and could tell that her scent had changed ... and considering how many kids had been through the mansion, he thought he recognized it. He hadn't told her yet, because he'd had to go to class and didn't want to wake her, but by the time he came home, he was starting to wonder if he  _should_.

Because the first thing that happened when he got home was that he passed Lorna and Annie chatting together in the living room and got a whiff… and it was the same scent from this morning.

Maybe he was off. It wouldn't be too unbelievable ... he wasn't exactly a pro at scents or tracking and never had been. But there was no way all  _three_  of them were pregnant on the same day, right? It had to be something else. Maybe they were sick…? Maybe he wasn't identifying the scent right?

"Hey, where's Logan?" he called out to the two women with a little frown.

"Oh, he's out fiddlin' with that silly motorcycle of his," Annie called back. "Out there with a smelly old cigar, I'm  _sure._ "

Tyler nodded at that before he headed back to the garage, that same frown still on his face when he poked his head in. "Hey, you got a minute?" he called out.

Logan looked up — a cigar between his teeth — and grumbled out a quiet "What's wrong?"

"I'm having a hard time identifying a scent," he admitted. "I thought I knew what it was this morning, but…"

Logan stopped what he was doing and kept his gaze on Tyler for a few moments, then took a deep pull off his cigar and exhaled the smoke out of his nose. "Gonna have to be more specific."

Tyler shook his head. "It might just be I've got babies on the mind, hanging out with Billy and Teddy after all that happened," he tried to shrug off.

"Who'd you scent it on?" Logan asked.

"Tammy, this morning," he said. "I was going to tell her when I got home, but it's on Annie and Lorna too."

Logan dropped the socket wrench he had and pushed back from the motorcycle. "Lorna too?" He scrubbed one hand over his face and shook his head. "Somethin's wrong alright. But I don't think your nose is off."

"Then all three of them? I mean, at the same time?"

"Six," Logan replied in a flat tone.

Tyler gaped at him. "Six?"

"So far, yeah," Logan said. "So somethin' has to be up."

"We could ask my dad," Tyler offered.

"Your dad is hiding in the med bay waiting for one of them to come down and ask about it. He's caught it too — believe me. He's trying to make himself available."

"Yeah, but ... six at once? That's not … that doesn't track."

"Well. He knew about  _one_."

"Which one?" Tyler asked.

"K."

Tyler broke into a huge grin at that. "Hey, that's great news. Congrats."

Logan smirked a bit. "Same to you," he said. "She's been telling me this is not what she meant when she said to pick my own Christmas present."

"Yeah, I'm sure Tammy would've preferred we wait until I was done with med school," Tyler said with a rueful grin.

"She'll be fine," Logan said with a little wave. "If she was that worried about it, she'd have put the wedding off."

Tyler grinned a little wider at that. "Well, I'll have to track her down and tell her now."

"No, no, no, no, no," Logan said shaking his head. "Let 'em figure it out on their own."

"She'd want to know," Tyler argued. "Probably be mad I know first, too."

"Yours is fine — but don't say a word about any of the others," Logan clarified. "I know K wants to wait. You'd figure it out if you got too close to either one of us; that's how Hank figured it out anyhow. She's been avoiding him like the plague."

Tyler smirked at that and shook his head. "Well, I won't ruin it for anyone else. But we should probably figure out what's going on that it's hitting  _six_ women in the house at once."

"More or less. Probably closer to five, since K's a little ahead of the curve. I think," he frowned. "I've got my doubts on one other …"

"Still."

"Yeah, I'm workin' on it. So's Hank. Anyone else is gonna have to come into it on their own. With that many of 'em at once, we don't want 'em takin' it out on anyone with a big mouth."

"So we should definitely  _not_ tell Tommy. Or Annie. Or Leslie Ann."

"No," Logan agreed. "Talk about it with Hank — alone. But I'm not talking about it with anyone at all. Outside of K."

"Well, if you find out anything — if it's dangerous or something — let me know, would you?" Tyler said. "If there's something unnatural…" He shifted. "Really don't want to screw this up."

"Just relax," Logan said. "So far, everyone's smelled ... well. As normal as can be, considering."

Tyler had to smirk and hold out his hands, palms up in a shrug. "Hey, can't blame me for being a little nervous. First-time dad."

"No, I expect it from you," Logan said with a smirk. "Go take care of your family."

Tyler broke into a grin and nodded, already halfway out the door by then, and headed down to Hank to tell him he was going to be a grandfather.

* * *

It was nearly the beginning of February when Clint showed up on the mansion steps with a rueful smile and a request to stay the night. "Nat's pissed."

"What'd you do?" K asked when she led him to the living room. "Because you had to have done something."

"Well, okay, this time, it was something we were  _both clearly involved in_ ," Clint defended. "But I think she's just blowing steam."

"Probably," K agreed as she pulled her feet underneath herself on the couch. "So, what'd you do?"

Clint leaned forward with a little excited spark behind his eyes. "Got her pregnant," he said. "I knocked up the Black Widow — again."

The smile K had been wearing simply fell. "Oh." She frowned and bit her lip before she shook her head quickly. "Well. Congratulations, of course."

But Clint wasn't about to let that pass. "Woah, hey, thought there would be a little more well to the well-wishing. What's up?"

"I'm not sure," K admitted. "But something is definitely up." She looked down the hall and stood up to take Clint by the hand and lead him down to Logan's office, where she closed the door behind her. "She's not the only one. And by 'one,' I mean we're up to seven now."

"Wait, what?" He gaped at her and then made a show of taking out, checking, and replacing his aide. "Alright go again. I must have misheard. There's no way I got that right."

She let out a breath and instead of saying it signed very carefully to relay the message again.

He stared at her hands, then glanced up at her, the excitement replaced very quickly by worry and confusion. "No way… there's just… that's just not possible," he muttered.

"Can't be coincidence, but … so far, pretty much all of them look like it happened at the same time." She gave him a tight smile.

Clint shook his head. "Well ... who's on the list? Maybe we can figure out the common thread."

"Okay,  _no_. First of all," she said, shaking her head, "I could tell you who's figured it out but not who's ready to share yet." She looked to the door and put her hands in her back pockets. "Now ... I'm about a week or so ahead of the pack. Ish."

He gaped at her for a second before he couldn't help the grin and wrapped her up in a hug. "Weird coincidences aside? That's  _great_! Congrats."

"Never letting him pick out his own Christmas present again," she muttered once the hug had ended.

Clint chuckled. "Oh that's a good one. Nat just kicked me out and told me to stop grinning before she'd let me back in. Which… isn't gonna happen."

"She and I … I kicked Logan out of bed for smiling too hard when he figured it out —  _first._ "

"How very rude of him," Clint said with a crooked grin.

"Well, come on, extra husband," she said as she laced her arm with his. "Let's find you a room until Nat decides she needs you for bringing her what she's craving. Which … is probably you anyhow."

"Yeah, well, she kept Zoe, so she's got snuggles," Clint laughed. "You should've seen her face when we told her she'd be a big sister. She was so  _mad_."

"If she was ready to tell Zoe, you'll be back soon enough," K said. "If she meant to do it alone, you wouldn't have seen that little exchange."

"Yeah, I know. Like I said, she's just blowing steam."

The two of them made their way upstairs, and K found him a room just across the hall from Kurt and Kate. "You know where everyone is, right? And if you need a break, Logan has cigars in the garage. I think you earned one." She popped up on her toes and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

He gave her a quick squeeze in return. "I didn't really do anything — just the fun part. Nat's gotta do the rest."

"Sure you didn't," she said before she poked him in the chest. "But I'm gonna disagree. You did something alright."

He chuckled. "Yeah, yeah, I was awake for that class."

"What'd he do now?" Kate asked, poking her head out of her room.

"He's too sexy for his house," K replied offhandedly before she breezed down the hall to her own room.

Clint was just  _laughing_ by that point, so it took Kate a minute to get his attention. "Hey — seriously. What's up?"

"What K said," he said, still laughing.

Kate crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "Really."

"Really, really. It's a surprisingly accurate description," he said. He kept grinning, but Kate still had her arms crossed, so he crossed the span to pick her up and spin her in a hug. "Zoe's gonna be a big sister," he told her when he set her down.

Kate gaped at him for a long moment and then broke into a little laugh. "No way," she said, throwing her arms around his neck in a hug. "Congratulations — that's great!"

He grinned and spun her around once more. "Nat kicked me out. She's taking it semi-well."

Kate laughed and hit him in the arm. "You'll be back before bedtime, you goof," she told him, her eyes sparkling as she pulled him into her and Kurt's room. Once the door was closed behind them both, she leaned forward. "So we were going to wait until after we do the song and dance with Kurt's dad in a couple weeks — you know, hit him, freeze him, stick him back under the house — but you're not the only one with a little hawkeye on the way."

Clint did his best impression of surprised as he wrapped her up in a hug. "Aww, Katie — that's great! What're you hoping for? Another little girl to kill Kurt dead with the nonstop flirting?"

"It's only Kari that does that."

"For now."

Kate rolled her eyes and shook her head at him. "You can't tell anyone yet, alright?"

"Hey, I don't spill your secrets. Mine? Sure. Yours?" He grinned and pulled her into another hug. "Not the ones you tell me not to, anyway." He hugged her tighter for a second before he said, "You know they're gonna be best friends, right? It's a given. Two hawks this close to each other?"

"Oh, for sure," Kate giggled.

"And you haven't told anyone yet?" Clint asked, grinning.

"Like I said, we'll wait until after we do the stupid demon spell dance," Kate said. "Stick the evil grandpa back underground,  _then_ tell everyone. No need to scare the girls even  _more_ when he shows, right?"

"Well, see if you can get it on video when you tell 'em. Zoe was so  _mad_. She made Nat swear up and down that she wouldn't have to share her room," Clint chuckled.

"She takes after her mom," Kate teased.

"Oh yeah. They run the place," Clint agreed without a moment's hesitation.

Kurt came in via poof of indigo smoke and startled for just an instant at finding Clint there with Kate. "Two hawks for one today?"

"Clint got kicked out of the house," Kate explained with a grin.

"What was the charge?" Kurt asked.

"I'm too sexy for my house," Clint said, and Kate just started  _giggling_.

Kurt looked between Clint's proud grin and Kate's giggles. "I'm not sure i want to know."

"Nat's pregnant," Clint explained. "We were just celebrating the fact that we'll have two baby hawks around the same time. Best friends already in the making, right?"

"I made him swear not to tell anyone until we're ready," Kate said with a smile. "But news like this is too good not to share. Me and Nat can be miserable together."

Kurt smiled Clint's way. "Congratulations; it looks like we're all in this together."

"So," Clint said with a grin. "What's for dinner, Big Daddy Elf?"

Kurt levelled a finger at Clint. "You cannot call me that. Ever again."

Clint laughed and held up both hands. "Yeah, got it. Wrong Hawkeye," he said, which earned him a punch in the arm from Kate that had him rubbing his shoulder. "Ow."

"Don't be stupid or we'll kick you out of this house too," she warned.

"Have to run it past my other wife first," Clint replied. "I'll bet she'd disagree."

"On you being stupid? No, no. She'd back me up," Kate countered.

"On kicking me out," he clarified. "Is this pizza night or is someone outside of Bobby cooking?"

"Chinese tonight," Kate told him. "Jubes came down with something horrible and hasn't been feeling good for, like, a week, so Noh is using his turn for dinner to get noodles and dumplings to cheer her up."

Clint tried very hard to look sympathetic instead of counting off in his head. "That's too bad. I hope she feels better."

"I need to tell Logan and K what the plan is tonight," Kurt said on his way to the door. "He was thinking of taking K out for something just the two of them."

"We'll meet you down there," Kate said.

"I'll take care of the girls," Clint said with a grin — and soon enough, he was, in fact, downstairs with the rest of the X-Men, with two little elflings in his lap, getting them both to dissolve into giggles at the faces he was making.

When K and Logan showed up with their little ones, they sat almost directly across from Clint, and Elin waved at him with a huge smile before she very carefully signed 'hello'. It was clear that she was just starting to learn, and being such a little perfectionist, she was slow to show anyone until they were nearly perfect.

He positively  _beamed_ at her and signed 'hello' right back along with the sign for 'beautiful' just to see if she knew it.

She giggled in response and pulled her shoulders up to her ears before she said very quietly, "Silly."

"No, no, it's true," he said. "You're a beautiful little girl. Just like your mom."

"Very silly," K replied as she put an arm around Elin so she could snuggle in.

"So, what's got you down here with us instead of with  _your_ beautiful little girl?" Forge asked across the table.

"Oh," Clint said in an offhanded tone. "I'm too sexy for my house."

"You sure are," K agreed, smirking at him and shaking her head.

"What's that supposed to  _mean,_ though?" Bobby asked. "Aside from getting that song in my head now, thanks."

"It means Nat kicked me out while she's processing the fact that she'll be down and out for, oh, nine months or so," Clint said with a huge grin spread all over his face.

Several of the couples around the table raised an eyebrow, but there was a hearty chorus of 'Congratulations' that made the rounds.

"Well, that's great news," Tammy said quietly, halfway leaned against Tyler. "That means ours will have someone to play with."

"Dis place gon' be fillin' up quick," Remy said with an eyebrow raised.

"Plenty to play with, Uncle Swamprat," K said with a teasing smile. "I'm sure one of them will like you."

He chuckled. "Don' be so hurtful, Miss K. You know dey all gon' like ol' Remy."

"Probably," she agreed with a little laugh. "Everyone else does."

"That's 'cause Gambles is  _silly_ ," Krissy explained matter-of-factly. "And he turns things Kari's favorite color."

"Yeah, right before they explode —  _boom_ ," Chance said helpfully with a huge grin that Krissy shot right back his way.

"And his  _gi-i-i-irlfriend_ is silly too," Krissy sang out, and Remy chuckled at her.

"She like you too,  _petit_."

"That's 'cause everybody likes me."

"Das right,  _petit._ Ain't nobody in de world like Miss Krissy."

Krissy giggled delightedly at that as she and the other little kids launched into all the fun things they did with Uncle Gambit — until Clint got a call from Natasha and Zoe telling him to come back.

"You should bring her some noodles," K suggested.

"Yeah, I should," Clint agreed. "If they work for cheering up Jubes, maybe they work on Nat too," he added with a crooked smirk.

"Always good for a sour stomach no matter what the cause," Henry agreed.

Clint grinned even wider at that and gave Henry a little two-fingered salute. "Good to know," he said before he slipped off, still chuckling to himself.


	14. William the Strong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the mystery of the magic babies is solved ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter of this volume, but don't worry! Volume 19, "Stars in Your Eyes," will be coming at you in no time!

 

It was nearly Valentine's Day when Hank had an unexpected visitor to his lab. It was Pepper Potts, and she looked somewhere between livid, terrified, and honestly upset as she simply dropped a file onto his desk, along with a small box full of positive pregnancy tests.

"Can you please explain this to me?" Pepper said with a flush to her cheeks. "Because in spite of everything that I've been told my whole life … this … is entirely contrary." She looked serious as she crossed her arms and stared at him as if he could figure it out just that quickly.

Henry blinked at her over the top of his glasses for a moment before he reached for her file to look through it, the surprise and curiosity turning to more honest confusion as he read over the diagnoses in her medical file and looked up at her, then back at the positive tests now littering his desk. He let out a little sigh. "I don't know what to tell you, my dear, other than that you're not the first to be more than a little confused by all this."

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked with a frown.

"It means, Miss Potts, you are not the only one with such happy news — nor are you the only one who thought it unlikely at the least."

She deflated slightly and blinked a few times. "Well … who else … is  _expecting_?"

"I can't tell you the names of anyone who isn't ready to tell, but I'm  _sure_ if you spend five minutes around Mr. Barton, you'll know at least one of them," Hank said with a soft sort of smile as he gestured for her to take a seat.

"Oh," she said, her eyebrows high on her head as she absently sunk into the chair. "I just … I didn't think this could happen."

Hank nodded at that. "Understandable, considering your file," he said.

"When would it be safe to tell Tony?" she asked, looking concerned as one hand flitted to her stomach. "I hate to get his hopes up."

"If you're truly concerned, I can check a few things for you," Hank offered. "But I'm sure he'll want to know as soon as you're comfortable telling him."

"I think I'd feel better if you did check me over," she said. "In case I'm... wrong."

Hank smiled at her gently. "That many tests would suggest that's just not the case."

"Henry," she said, her chin tipped down. "Please."

He nodded at that and led her over to begin some of the basic tests. If she was following the pattern of the others, there might even be a heartbeat. Jubilee was the exception — she had a heartbeat at six weeks after that horrible bout of nausea — but the others would likely be able to hear their little ones within the next few days.

"If you're as far along as I suspect," Hank said, "we could find a heartbeat for you ... unless you prefer to wait for Tony."

She looked surprised at that and began to shake her head as she said "yes."

"Perhaps we'll wait for Tony," Hank said with a gentle smile.

"Right," she said. "I'll … I'll call him... He should be between meetings. He was worried …"

"Why don't you come upstairs and have some lunch first?" Henry suggested. "You can tell him in person, but my dear, you've had a great shock, and I wouldn't have you going off on your own just yet."

"Yes, of course," she said, one hand to her temple. "I don't mean to concern you. Perhaps some tea."

Henry smiled at her and gently led her up to where a few of the other staff members were grabbing a bite between classes as well, guiding her to a seat before he put the kettle on for them both.

While Pepper and Hank quietly drank their tea, the rest of the staff was in and out of the room. Erik asked if he could have some of what they had made as well, and when Hank had poured him a cup, he took it over to where K was seated with a gentle smile and a twinkle in his eye.

"I suppose you are waiting to share your good news until after the fervor of everyone else's has died down," he told her with that same warm smile. "Congratulations, by the way."

The little feral allowed a surprised expression to show as he took a seat next to her. "That … really wasn't a consideration," K admitted before she thanked him for the tea. "What, may I ask, gave me away?"

"My dear," he said with a little smile, "I've been around long enough to recognize the signs. And between you and I, yours are not so very different from my daughter's."

"No, I suppose not," K admitted. "Though I like to think that most people don't really consider me on the list of possibilities until the cat's out of the bag."

"You certainly aren't as easy to consider as Jubilation, for one," Erik said.

"No, that was a blazing neon sign... that I'm a little ashamed to say I was grateful for. Great distraction."

Erik smiled at that and nodded. "Well, all the same, I wanted to offer my congratulations so that you didn't feel forgotten in this recent… deluge of news," he said.

"I'm perfectly fine with being forgotten," K told him before she covered his hand with hers. "As long as Logan can take the time to hide with me — all the better."

"Then let me offer my congratulations on behalf of the little one. He or she won't be forgotten in the least," Erik said with a smile. "I'm sure the little one will be just as delightful as the two you already have."

"Thank you," she replied with a little smile. "I know they love being near you."

"Well, they are young," Erik said with a little laugh. "It helps not to have known me in the past. And I adore them, of course."

"Well, I didn't know you in the past either," she replied. "Though I read all about it when it all happened." She leaned his way. "It hasn't colored my opinion in the least."

Erik laughed lightly. "And you are one of the few," he said. "It means more to me than you know."

* * *

Valentine's Day had been interesting around the mansion with as many announcements as there were being made. The families involved were now on more or less the same page, now that it was clearer and clearer that something more than just the usual good news was going on.

But it was happy news all the same, and since no one could find a single thing wrong with any of them or the babies, they chose to celebrate anyway. Kamala was particularly delighted to hear that, with Jubilee's sped-up Kree time frame, they were due at about the same time. "That way I won't be the odd woman out!" she'd said, which got a smile out of the very grumpy Jubilee at least.

Still, it had been an interesting Valentine's Day. There was the traditional cupcake sharing, of course — though Annie had  _not_ been feeling up to actually eating the frosting. Making it, sure, but not eating it. Chance thought this was a sign that his mom was horribly ill and spent the whole day fussing over her, only stopping for a  _little_ bit to share a cupcake with Elin, as was traditional.

And Jubilee had been sick the whole day (again), to the point that Hank had all but moved her into the med bay to keep her from dehydrating. Which meant Noh spent all of Valentine's Day in Hank's lab with her looking appropriately apologetic (though Sying was just pleased as punch, having overheard K telling Logan about his 'Christmas present' and deciding for himself that Santa had brought him the little sister he'd been asking for).

But mostly, it was just a day full of the ladies feeling crummy, their men taking care of them, the kids being excited and getting frosting everywhere ... and anyone who  _wasn't_ dealing with morning sickness batting cleanups on sugar-high kids.

Which meant everyone was fairly tired the day after Valentine's when Doctor Strange, of all people, showed up. Billy came trailing behind him looking slightly red-faced, but Strange gave him an almost sympathetic look as the two of them stepped in from the mid-February chill.

Storm was there to greet both of them with her usual warm smile as she motioned them inside. "What can we do for you two?" she asked.

"It's my understanding that there was a bit of accidental magic," Strange said, though he didn't glance Billy's way. "I simply needed to find out how permanent it is."

Storm glanced over at the red-faced Billy, and her lips parted in understanding before she simply nodded. "I'll make sure everyone who needs to speak with you gets to the living room," she said, gesturing to the nearby room so the men could wait while she did just that.

It took a little doing and a few bamfs, since Jubilee wasn't feeling up to  _moving_ , but they all got there eventually, with Billy looking redder and redder as time went on, especially when he saw how miserable Jubilee was.

"Alright, you've got us all in one place— what's the story?" Lorna asked as she settled in with Annie.

"Well… I am," Billy said, staring at his hands clasped in front of him and looking the very image of sorry. He took a deep breath. "Do you guys remember forever ago when I accidentally turned Kate into a four-year-old?"

" _No,_ " K said, sounding as if she'd been robbed of something wonderful. "Can you do it again?"

" _No,_ " Kate, Kurt, and Billy all said at once.

Billy cleared his throat and looked even more sheepish. "It was an accident when I did it then. I was thinking too hard about something Logan had said and… I sorta did that again here. Only I was thinking about kids."

"So it's Logan's fault," Jubilee teased. "Again."

"What did you do exactly?" K asked with a little frown. "Because I don't follow."

Billy took a deep breath and looked to Strange, but the older magic user seemed to think he should do the explaining here. He let out all his breath and kept his gaze on his hands. "See, my powers work based purely on what I want. What I ask for. I change reality by wanting it to be changed. And… I was so upset a couple months ago that I wasn't focusing or meditating or keeping myself in check like I should, and my powers bled through to change reality on accident again." He looked totally miserable. "I'm so sorry. I wasn't  _trying_ to change anything. I was just jealous that you all had families…."

"So you … think you got all eight of us pregnant?" K asked. "That's impressive. If it's a boy, I'm naming him William the Strong."

Billy turned a tremendous purple color at that and seemed to be unable to form words, so Strange stepped in at last. "That's what we're here to find out, at any rate. And to check to veracity of the spell," he said with a little smile Billy's way. "The last time this happened, it was fairly permanent and would have remained if we hadn't interfered. We just want to make sure that's the case here as well — to prevent any undue trauma if we can."

The gathered women all shared a look, though it was clear that Pepper and Annie in particular were more than a little nervous about the prospect of the spell  _not_ remaining permanent. "Well, what do you need us to do?" Pepper asked as she straightened up. "I'm still not very used to dealing with magic, but I'm up to … whatever you need."

"For the moment, we simply require your presence," Strange assured her. "Wiccan and I will perform an exploratory spell. It won't affect any of you or the spell you're all under in the least; it will only identify who is affected and what kind of magic — temporary or otherwise — we are dealing with." He paused and smiled her way. "If you are concerned, if the spell is temporary, it should be possible for Wiccan to simply strengthen it and make it permanent instead. It is his reality, after all."

"Go ahead then," Annie said, waving her hands as if to shoo him to it.

Strange nodded and then looked to Billy, who still looked fairly purple, but both magic users got to work. Strange's light show was familiar to those who had been through this with tiny Katie the first time around, though this time, there was the addition of Billy checking on not just the spell but the people in it as he went through each of the women's names to chant under his breath as he scanned them.

"Well?" Jubilee asked when the lights returned to normal.

"Well," Strange said with a smile at the corner of his mouth, "it seems congratulations are in order for all eight of you. Unless you would like Wiccan to break the spell, this  _is_ reality now; no changing it." He paused and added, "And you  _all_  seem perfectly healthy."

"And everyone was hit by the spell?" Natasha asked with one perfect eyebrow arched high.

"Not everyone," Strange admitted, though he looked past her at K.

"Well. There it is, Billy," K said as she got to her feet and crossed over to give him a little kiss on the cheek. "Some of us had to do it the old-fashioned way with lots and lots of fun hard work." She leaned over his shoulder and had to pick. "But I'm still leaning to William if it's a boy. Too good to pass up."

Billy was still red-faced but couldn't help the little smirk at that. "Well, considering the family history... who knows if he'll even use the name."

"I sincerely hope he would," she said. "Considering the family history."

Billy nodded, though he still looked very sheepish and guilty, as that still meant there were seven women who had him to blame for their current state.

" _No one_  is upset," Annie told him when she stepped forward to give him a hug and a kiss too. "Not even Jubilee."

"Are ... you sure about that?" he asked. "She looks pretty miserable."

"Well, yeah, I'm miserable," Jubilee replied as she picked her head up off her arm. "But … I kinda … sorta … don't hate the idea. I mean…. Can you imagine a little girl to give Noh a hard time? Come on."

"Does that mean you're on board with Sying's little sister campaign?" Kate had to tease.

"Seeing as I have a fifty-fifty shot at that? Yes. I so totally am," Jubes replied. "What about you? Are you on team purple elf or are you looking for one that's fuzzy and blue?"

"I'm really kind of hoping for another girl," Kate admitted. "They destroy Kurt already, and Krissy's not even four yet. Can you imagine the three of them all grown up and  _dating_?"

"Yes, but imagine the fits he'd have trying to rein in a tiny version of himself?"

"This is true. And Krissy would like a little brother. She likes playing with James and Elin," Kate admitted.

"I'm happy either way," Tammy said with a little smile.

"Yeah, because it'll be blonde-haired and blue eyed either way," Lorna teased. "Little cutie pie."

"Oh, absolutely," Tammy said, the smile growing. "And you? Are you hoping for another girl to make your dad melt all over again?"

"He'll melt either way," Kate pointed out with a little laugh.

"Then ... nobody's mad," Billy said, still sounding like he didn't quite believe that.

"If it makes you feel better, we can get mad if you keep asking that," K offered.

Billy laughed and shook his head, his hands up. "No, no. I just… was expecting… I mean…"

"You know what you're missing, sweetheart?" K asked. "You didn't get any of Annie's baking yesterday. Come on. Isn't that what you troublemakers do? Sugar up when you're done dragging yourself through the mud?"

Billy had to laugh again as he let K pull him toward the kitchen. "Yeah, I guess that's true."

* * *

And while the rest of the group was teasing Billy, Bobby had someone else in mind entirely for teasing.

He hadn't even reached Rachel, though, before she said, without turning around, "If you say one word, I'm going to make you think you're the Little Mermaid."

Bobby couldn't help but laugh. "Seriously?"

"I know what you're thinking, and it's nowhere close to being as funny as you think it is."

Bobby let out his breath and then rested his chin over her shoulder so she could see how hard he was smirking. "Come on. You know you were thinking it too." And just so he couldn't be misunderstood, he was sure to project out to her,  _It's a good thing you didn't get magicked over to Billy and Teddy's, or we'd have to come up with a quick explanation._

Rachel pushed him away from her, though he couldn't stop grinning when she saw that she couldn't be that mad at him when she was smirking to herself.  _If you want to keep crashing into each other, you will_ not  _say things like that in front of my dad._

_What, are you nuts? I actually like the guy. I've known him since we were kids. I don't want him to keel over!_

_Yeah, it's not him I'm worried about,_ Rachel said, though she couldn't help but laugh.

Bobby smirked and then stole a very quick kiss. "But that sounds like you wouldn't mind a few more nights like—"

"I'm  _considering_ it," she said, one eyebrow raised.

He grinned. "Saturday night work for you?"

Rachel turned to face him, holding the raised-eyebrow expression for a moment longer before she finally cracked into a smile. "Alright. You're buying."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Editor's Note: Just to give you a sense of how long we've been working on this thing (and how MUCH we have written out ahead of time)... this part was written long before we knew Bobby and Daken were a thing. And we actually kinda like them in the comics? But when we wrote this, he didn't have much in the way of attachments, and we were squicked by the whole "Young Jean forcibly outing someone" storyline so we thought… who do we know who could benefit from a hilarious Iceman and who could temper him I KNOW A HILARIOUS SASSY SUMMERS COULD DO IT and, well… this is where it went :)


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